Willow Smith, you are talented. Your music pairs whimsy with sass. Even if you did not have two extremely famous, wealthy parents, I would still like you. That is why I am very disappointed in you right now.
You do not need to go the way of the Cyruses.
Am I making myself clear, young lady? You do not need to work a stripper pole—or so much as strike a pose anywhere near one—to further your career, little miss. Not even if you think it’s sort of funny. Maybe you can crack these jokes when you are 12. But you are still 11. Eleven.
And according to gossip blog NecoleBitchie (heh, clever), this cell phone snap appeared on your own personal Instagram, for every pre-teen girl to see. Willow! No!
OK: I’m sure you thought you were being cute and precocious at the time. But just, no. Oh, kid. No. Because, while the photo has since disappeared from your Instagram account—which was the right decision—I have it now. Me. I do. Because the Internet is very fast to jump on this sort of thing. I am, after all, a celebrity gossip blogger, and it is my job to look for little trip-ups like this.
And I am not going to make a joke at your expense, because you’re 11 and I like you, but I am a childless, grown woman who nonetheless feels entitled to put you through the wringer. Consider this your first warning, young lady.
This sort of behavior won’t be “cute” when you’re 17 and, frankly, if I were your mother, we would have a long talk about What Goes Up Onto the Internet and Why an 11-Year-Old Girl on a Stripper Pole is a Bad Idea. Then, if you were properly and duly repentant, I might think about giving your cell phone back to you.
January 10, 2012 at 12:30 pm by Jenn
Well, it turns out that it has something to do with the fact that her parents are both millionaires and push-overs. Jada, her mom, recently did an interview in which she confessed that Willow doesn’t just decide what she likes when it comes to her own clothes, she decides what her mother wears, too.
The actress, when asked about her style, told PopDash.com, “Willow goes in my closet and tells me the things to get rid of that are old. So I pretty much listen to that. She says, ‘You should let me have this and I can cut it up,’ and I just go, ‘OK! Go ahead, take it, do what you want.’ So she pretty much takes my stuff and sees what it can do for her. So she doesn’t do anything for me besides just taking it.”
Uhhh, maybe I was raised in a super strict household, but I’m pretty sure that any time I so much as LOOKED at my mother’s closet I was told to get real and go clean my bedroom. That’s one of the shitty parts of being a kid: Not understanding why you can’t have everything you want and dealing with it anyway. Then again, being the family’s breadwinner these days, it’s kind of unclear whether or not Willow can even be classified as a child.
Is it just me? Was anyone else out there allowed to rummage through their mom’s closet, taking the good stuff and deciding what was too embarrassing to wear? And if you were allowed to do that, are you a functioning adult?
March 18, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Molls
Well. OK. The song itself, predictably, makes me want to cut my ears off and bury them in the sand next to girlfriend’s guitar, in hopes that her raucous unearthing of said guitar doesn’t disturb my poor, severed ears so that they may rot in peace and solitude for all eternity. I also want to die quite a bit every time I hear little Willow say ‘I like to rock the beat,’ because THEN all I can think of that stupid-assed lilty-voiced yodel that Ke$ha does in ALL OF HER FUCKING SONGS.
On the positive side, I do know that I’d totally love the video and song both if I was eight again, and then I feel bad for bashing it to begin with. ‘The little girl’s ten years old, Sarah, ffs.’ I KNOW, alright?
And lastly? I don’t get the old lady in the beginning. Can someone with a deeper intellect than I apparently possess explain it to me?
March 7, 2011 at 3:30 pm by Sarah
People I’ve spoken to about Willow Smith usually have one of two opinions: 1) She was trained to be a mini-diva by her famous parents and she’s not all that great, or 2) Total amazement. I fall into the second group of people.
The photos and video from her Teen Vogue shoot are a prime example of how good she is at this whole showbiz thing. Her interview was smart and funny, she has a great grip on her personal style and she makes the camera her bitch.
We’ve seen a lot of celebrities have kids over the years, but few have produced a child with this much natural swagger, ambition and talent. It’s kind of scary to think that this ten year old girl is already so confident in her own skin. Whether she glides through puberty this effortlessly remains to be seen, but she still has the next two years or so to pad a nice little college fund for herself and burn the image of her face onto our brains.
What do you think of Willow Smith now that “Whip My Hair” fever has ceased? Do you think that she has what it takes to stick around?
February 4, 2011 at 1:00 pm by Molls
Oh snap, you guys. If this is true, fuck … I’ll be so disappointed in the Fresh Prince that I won’t be able to watch reruns at 2 AM anymore when I’m having fits of insomnia and the desire for shitty takeout Chinese food and that? Is bad.
According to author Terry McMillan, Will and wife Jada are pushing their kids to succeed in the entertainment field in order to capitalize off of their fame, because apparently they don’t have enough money or something. McMillan took to her Twitter earlier in the week saying:
February 1, 2011 at 9:00 am by Sarah
If you were one of the biggest jokes in your industry, would you wait months and months to share that you were responsible for one of the biggest pop hits of the year? That’s what Soulja Boy supposedly did.
While the “Pretty Boy Swag” singer’s own album “DeAndre’s Way” was considered to be a flop by most, Soulja is claiming on his Twitter that he was behind Willow Smith’s hit, “Whip My Hair”. If this is true, then SB definitely has a reason to harbor all that swag. The dude (who is not credited anywhere on Willow’s album) should have pulled in some serious cash for his lyrics.
I’m guessing that this is not true, just a joke that’s as awkward as the rest of his career. I’m guessing we’ll hear the truth from Willow’s camp sooner rather than later. If Soulja Boy’s not responsible for this song, I’m pretty sure no one who was actually involved would want him taking credit.