“I’ve always been the type to fall in love fast and, with every boyfriend, I plan out my wedding in my head.”
Oh god, of course Kim Kardashian is That Girl. I bet she goes into business meetings and doodles hearts and rainbows and writes “Mrs. Kim West” or “Mrs. Kim Bush” or “Mrs. Kim Bieber” (don’t tell me she’s never thought about it). I bet she gets home from first dates and calls up a friend to talk about how “no seriously, I think this guy is The One” and “we would make totally cute babies!” And I bet that when she says that she plans out weddings “in my head,” she actually means that she plans out weddings with a wedding planner and speaks to florists and bakeries and books a venue, just in case.
And don’t think for one minute that I was going to post that terrifying picture of Kim without commenting on it. What’s with that greasy hair look she’s been rocking lately? And that dress? Ugh. If Kanye is going to style her, he should at least make her look nice. And hey, didn’t Kim used to not be a soulless, heartless monster? She at least never looked like one, until now, that is. Look at those eyes. But look away quickly, I don’t want anyone else to lose their soul.
July 5, 2012 at 5:30 am by Emily
Remember how Emily told you guys in yesterday’s very last post that Kanye‘s controlling pretty much everything Kim’s doing with her look lately? Because it’s true, and he’s definitely rubbing off on her (and I mean that in every sense conceivable). See this photo? This is actually Kim Kardashian on her way to the gym without makeup, and For Real No Makeup, not “Teehee! No makeup!” like she blows her Twitter feed all up with.
Also, it’s been brought to my attention that—aww, poor baby—Kim’s not exactly comfortable in her own skin. Nope, during a recent interview, she claims that she’s not always comfortable. From People, Kim Kardashian when asked if she feels comfortable in her own skin:
“… No, I’m such a perfectionist. I don’t think I’m ever really comfortable.”
Which is, you know, a complete and utter departure from her People interview back in 2009, where she said she’s always comfortable in her own skin. Yeah, I don’t know either. From the 2009 interview:
“I realized I felt good. I wasn’t as insecure as I’ve always been. I’m comfortable in my own skin.”
I don’t know, friends. I mean, she just sounds so unsure. And that makes me feel unsure, too. Because the only thing that holds full with absolute certainty in this situation is that Kim Kardashian is a tool. And so is her boyfriend. Case closed.
June 30, 2012 at 7:00 am by Sarah
Do you see that situation happening on top of Kim Kardashian‘s head right there? That’s supposed to be her real hair. No extensions. You can also see that Kim’s makeup looks a little lighter than it usually does. So what’s the deal? Has Kim turned over a new leaf? Did she just feel like being a little more laid back? Nah, the deal is that Kanye wants her to be more natural. Cool, I guess.
Kanye West has told his girlfriend, Kim Kardashian, to ditch her signature hair extensions because he likes the E! reality star, au naturale, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.
During Kim’s sit-down interview with Oprah Winfrey, which delivered blockbuster ratings to the fledgling OWN channel, she revealed her feelings about new boyfriend, Kanye West.
“Is Kanye West your new fairy tale?” Oprah asked the reality star.
“We met almost a decade ago, we’ve known each other for a very long time, we’ve been friends for six or seven years,” the 31-year-old beauty said, beaming. “I don’t know why it took us so long to get together: I think we’ve always had an attraction to each other, but we’ve always been in other relationships or it wasn’t the right timing.
Noticeably absent during the interview with Oprah, and in subsequent days, Kim’s hair extensions, which makes her locks appear longer and fuller. Kanye has told Kim “he doesn’t like the hair extensions, he thinks she is beautiful without out them. Kim’s natural hair is past her shoulders, and Kanye has told Kim she is a natural beauty and doesn’t need to do anything to alter her looks. Kim is following is advice, and as the cameras are still filming Keeping Up With The Kardashians, viewers will see a much different looking Kim this fall on the show,” a source close to the situation tells us.
There’s a big, big difference between telling your girlfriend “hey, you’re beautiful without all this extra stuff,” or even “I like it when you wear less makeup,” and “get rid of those hair extensions.” If you think about this story along with the one from last month about how Kanye is taking control of Kim’s fashion choices, then I’m going to go ahead and guess it’s the latter. And then seems a little shady to me.
But hey, isn’t it so weird to see Kim like this?
June 29, 2012 at 5:30 pm by Emily
But is this shit for real enough to be deserving of another televised fairy tale wedding?
Kim Kardashian is no stranger to walking down the aisle — she already has two marriages under her belt. But the next time she gets married, if it is to Kanye West, the cameras may be capturing her third wedding!
“Kanye wouldn’t be opposed to having a huge TV wedding,” a source close to the rapper explains to HollywoodLife.com. “He’d do it just to prove his wedding to Kim would get more way more viewers than Prince Williams’ wedding.” Hmm, we haven’t heard that before — cough, last August, cough, cough — right?
But even though Kanye, 35 , would want his wedding to his love Kim, 31, televised, that doesn’t mean he’s already picking out rings. “That’s so not on his mind right now,” our insider reveals. “He’s just enjoying dating her. [But], yes, he would marry on TV, why not? What better way to get married to the love of your life and get paid at the same time? Kanye don’t [put] nothing down but his collar. So I think he’d do it.”
Kim almost spilled that she wanted to marry Kanye on Oprah Winfrey‘s recent OWN special on June 24, but caught herself just as she was about to say she’d like to do it. She admitted to Oprah that she and Kanye have been mutually attracted to each other “for a long time.” Meanwhile, another source close to Kanye reveals that the singer is madly in love with Kim. “I don’t think people understand how much he’s into Kim. Like this s–t is for real. He’s always wanted her and now that he has her, it’s a wrap! I never knew my boy Kanye to be the marrying type — but once Kim gets untangled from that p—y she of a dude she married, she and Kanye just may go there.”
He may have a little work to do with Kim, convincing her to marry in front of a TV crew. “When I saw Khloé and Lamar get married — and they had their wedding on TV — I thought, ‘Oh, my gosh, that’s so exciting! That’s what I want,’” Kardashian recently told Allure magazine. “If you were to ask me now, that’s not what I want … I would just want it to be so special, with our family and close friends, and that’s it. Somewhere on a deserted island, very private. No cameras.” Hmm- we think Kim could have a change of heart especially if her mom, Kris Jenner, has her way!
Please, as if Kim would even be capable of having a private wedding with no cameras. She’s a hopeless romantic, remember? And, as we all know, spending millions of dollars so that your wedding can be viewed by as many strangers as possible is, like, the definition of romance.
Can’t wait for y’all’s E! special!
June 27, 2012 at 5:30 am by Emily
Look, I know that this is the third story about Kim Kardashian that we’ve told you today. I know that, and I’m sorry. But listen … this bitch …
“I think if I’m 40, and I don’t have any kids,and I’m not married, I would have a baby artificially inseminated,” she said. “I would feel like Mary, like Jesus is my baby.”
Sorry, Kimmy, but I’m pretty sure that no situation that could possibly happen in reality would be capable of making you anything like the Virgin Mary. I don’t really need to explain that to you any further, do I? Because it could get embarrassing. I mean, it involves urine. Don’t make me explain that Jesus’ mom never got peed on on camera, all right?
Oh, and here’s another reason why Kim Kardashian and the Virgin Mary are different: Mary never got married while she was still sleeping with another dude, but Kim did. Yes, according to Kris Humphries, Kanye wasn’t at the wedding because he was sleeping with Kim, and, you know, awkward.
Kris Humphries told his ex, Myla Sinanaj … he KNEW Kim Kardashian hooked up with Kanye West because he was mysteriously absent from the big wedding … sources close to Myla tell TMZ.
We’re told Kris groused to Myla about how Kris Jenner suspiciously referred to Kanye as “a close family friend” — someone Kim knew for a long time. Kris H told Myla, “If he was such a close family friend, why wasn’t he invited to the wedding?”
We’re told Kris confided in Myla he “felt played” by the whole thing and was genuinely devastated when news of Kim’s new relationship broke.
Our sources say Kris was with Myla the day Kanye’s song about dating Kim (and dissing Kris) was released — and Kris was “visibly upset.”
But hey, can’t wait to meet your baby Jesus, Kim!
June 25, 2012 at 3:30 pm by Emily
“No … It’s your heart you’re playing with. I couldn’t sacrifice my heart for a publicity stunt. … I have to first get divorced. But to have him in my life this way, I think, says a lot about us.”
Here’s the thing: Kim’s got something 100% right today. It does say a lot about the two of them that they’re in each others’ lives like this.
And Kim could never “sacrifice” her “heart” for a “publicity stunt”? First, Kim doesn’t have a heart, guys. It’s harsh, but it’s just truth. Second? If you don’t have a heart, you can’t sacrifice one. And Kim doesn’t even know the meaning of the word ‘sacrifice’. To even know the definition of the word ‘sacrifice’, one would realize that you get nothing in return for sacrificing something. I don’t think Kim is a shrewd enough to realize that the more you sacrifice, the more you get back in the long run. No, Kim is only concerned with the here and now and what she can get her grubby little hands on.
Finally, Kim saying that she’d never do anything off-the-cuff for the sake of a publicity stunt, and then in the same breath, saying that it says a lot about Kanye in her life at this time in her life (and by “this time in her life,” I mean “before her divorce is even final”). And none of it’s good.
You know, I completely abhor writing different things about Kim Kardashian day in and day out, but guys, it’s so hard not to. So, so hard.
Last, yes, I know that Emily already talked about this interview in a general way this morning, dropping gems on you guys left and right like how Bruce Jenner regrets Kim’s wedding, and how Scott Disick is totally moved by Kourtney’s crying, and of course, Kim telling everyone just how beautiful she is, but I wanted to really, really delve into Kim’s publicity stunt comments, because they just got me so, so much today. Like, right here. Right in the heart.