Oh man. This is so over-the-top and ridiculous that it’s actually funny, unlike many of the other ‘Funny or Die’ videos that we’ve ran here. Remember Vanessa Hudgen’s FOD? God. The worst. Rachel Bilson‘s? Equally bad, if not slightly worse. The only one that ever really made me chuckle even a little bit was the one that featured Courtney Stodden. That one was alright, I suppose. At least when you compare it to Vanessa’s and Rachel’s and, of course, we can’t forget

The thing about this “trailer,” however, is that it’s completely believable. I mean, I could honestly see this movie being made. All they have to do is build around the preview. It’s all there, right in front of them. It’s like ‘Battleship’ meets ‘Independence Day’ meets horrible, craptastic SyFy made-for-TV movies THAT I LOVE like ‘Seattle Superstorm‘.

Can we get a hold of someone who can really make this happen? Please?

Yes, guys, we’ve got Tot Mom, Tanning Mom, and now there’s Barbie Mom. If you don’t know who Barbie Mom is, consider yourself one of the lucky, because she’s a big gigantic asshole, too, and chances are, you probably know too many assholes as it were.

Barbie Mom’s name is Sarah Burge, and she … well, she looks like a Barbie due to tons of plastic surgery. She’s purchased vouchers for her daughter to get plastic surgery when she’s legally able to, and she fully endorses Botox for her fifteen-year-old pageant daughter so as to avoid sweating during pageants.

During the show, Anderson asked Barbie Mom a question about her daughter’s Botox use, and after she gave up some kind of lame explanation as to how she’d much rather take her daughter for Botox than to find out her daughter’s buying black market Botox and injecting herself (… people actually do that?), Anderson fell silent and told the woman that he had nothing else to say to her because she was, and I quote, “dreadful.” There was a moment of awkward quiet, to which Burge emitted several high-pitched “That’s fine”s and excused herself from the set during the middle of taping.

Can I tell you—once more—how much I absolutely love and adore this man?

Will Smith was on last night’s ‘Late Show’, where he was, predictably, asked about the reporter face-slapping incident. The bottom line? Will said it was awkward, and the reporter, though acting out his “schtick,” as other media sources put it, the attempted kiss was why he got “schtuck.” So unfunny, Will. So. unfunny.

A lot of you guys weighed in after seeing the video of Will decking the dude who attempted to kiss him—which you can watch below—but I’m still sticking to my guns in that I think his initial behavior of pushing the guy away was impulsive (though you can’t really blame someone too much for acting on their first impulse, especially when they feel a line has been crossed), but his second action—the one where he backhanded the guy—was most definitely bang out of order.

I don’t care how many cutesy interviews you do where you rap the theme song to ‘Fresh Prince’, Will, or how many self-deprecating comments you make about your big-ass ears in 3D, I think we saw a side of you that you probably didn’t want us to, and because of that, things kind of change a little bit, y’know?

Let’s revisit this again, shall we?

John Mayer uses 50 Shades of Grey to pick up chicks. [The Superficial]

Tracy Morgan is Khloe Kardashian’s father. [The Superficial]

Why Bar Refaeli is number one with Maxim. [Yeeeah]

Megan Fox is having a girl! [IDLYITW]

Gisele is knocked up again, too. [Hollywood Backwash]

Tara Reid is dating a sixty-year-old dude. [Cele|bitchy]

Selena Gomez‘s Facebook was hacked and all of her private messages, too. [Hollywood PQ]

The search for Kim Kardashian’s sex tape. [Huff Po]

Kristen Stewart‘s ‘On the Road’ photo call. [Cele|bitchy]

Adam Levine has a “beautiful” life with reality TV. [I'm Not Obsessed]

Disney shuts down ‘Order of the Seven‘. [Pajiba]

PHOTO: Amanda Seyfried looks unbelievable. [theBERRY]

Eva Mendes is poor. [Celebslam]

A felt kitten brooch? [The Frisky]

Steve Harvey squals like a teenage girl. [Seriously OMG]

Zac Efron‘s man-bags. [Socialite Life]

… If Gwyneth ranked her friends. [Lainey Gossip]

Kim Kardashian is seeking the friendship of the aforementioned Tara Reid. Winners. Both of them. [TMZ]

And her problem is “looking like this when she drinks,” and not necessarily having an actual issue with alcohol like, you know, being unable to stop consuming it. No, I think the biggest problem we’re dealing with here is Cammy’s big old drunkface, because it’s WOW. It’s all up in there; it’s all over the place. And why is the bottom of her hair wet? Is it puke? Is it just backsplash from vomiting in the john? Because if her hair were as short as it used to be, that might not have happened, but then again, she’d probably be drinking so heavily in that case that she’d be passed out in the toilet and not even out and about and able to make this epic drunkface. I guess we should probably be thanking our lucky stars in one way or another.

Anyway. This is Cameron Diaz leaving a club at three o’clock this morning, and if you check out the photos in the gallery, you’ll see that she gets a little help walking to her car. And in light of that, what I want to know is why all of these celebrities feel it a necessity to have handlers escorting them out of a club, putting their hands on them and steadying them and making sure that they get into their waiting vehicles OK. Because you see it all of the time. Celebrities drunk and falling out of clubs while burly men grasp their elbows and occasionally their waists if they’re really loaded, and you hardly ever see any of these celebrities bite it and land on the ground.

I mean, when I was in my very, very early twenties (and OK, my late, late teens), I was leaving bars without the help of any burly men, and if and when I bit it and landed on the ground on my way out, you know what happened? Well. Let’s just say that I didn’t have any “friends” there to steady me or pick me up, because they were all too busy pointing and laughing at my silly ass on the ground. These celebrities, guys, I just don’t know. It’s like they have no sense of reality or something.

Looking good, girl!

Wow. This is almost nothing like I envisioned it to be, but then again, we are talking Baz Luhrmann, who did ’96′s ‘Romeo+Juliet’, which was like an acid trip in a movie theater. Honestly, I’m kind of disappointed, because I think a lot could have been done with a ‘Great Gatsby‘ reboot, but now we won’t actually see my grand vision for at least another two decades when they decide to to a remake of the remake of the remake of the original once more.

I’m kidding. This movie and everything it entails looks absolutely amazing. Not amazing enough, you know, to go out and see it on Christmas Day or anything (who actually does that? Do you, or someone you know, go out and hit up the movie theater on Christmas Day or Christmas Night? Because I know that I’m usually cuddled up on the couch all day long eating and opening presents and drinking wine and watching fabulous movies that are hardly ever on network television and the last thing—the absolute last thing—I want to be doing is leaving the house for any particular reason whatsoever), but it looks pretty f-cking fabulous nevertheless.

Thoughts on that and, of course, thoughts on ‘The Great Gatsby’? Aside from how Leonardo DiCaprio was a brilliant choice for Jay Gatsby, and how Tobey Maguire still makes people want to slit their wrists because he sucks so hard?