So here are some photos of Katie Holmes in a very mediocre bathing suit, chilling out with her daughter. The girls were photographed sunning themselves and hanging out at a hotel in Miami while daddy Tom was at some kind of mind-control convention or Vulcan death grip practice or something. While she looks great, Katie still kind of strikes me as not exactly being thrilled with the way her life’s turned out (with the obvious exception of her little doll, Suri – you can tell she loves that kid more than life). I’m still going to say that’s all got to do with coming off second best in Tom’s ‘marry-an-up-and-coming-celebrity-and-then-squash-her-down’ contest.
Just imagine what a different world it would be if Katie Holmes never took the bait and took those vows with Cruise. She might have married Chris Klein ffs, and then he might not have turned into such a dweeb. He might have actually stayed relevant. And not fat. Crazy. The speculation could go on and on.
Also, it looks like she’s missing an eyetooth or something in one of the photos. I’m also going to attribute that to being married to Tom Cruise for too long, because he’s probably behind everything else that’s ill in the world as well.