Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Who Is Suri’s Biological Father?

A photo of Suri Cruise

The idea that Tom Cruise is not the biological father of Suri isn’t new, not by a long shot. Way back when Suri was born, there were conspiracies about the paternity. Here’s a quick summary, since 2006 was a long time ago: Katie broke up with Chris Klein in March of 2005, and she began dating Tom just a few weeks later. Suri was born in April of 2006. BUT the public didn’t get a glimpse of Suri until months later, and her birth certificate wasn’t issued until three weeks after she was actually born, so was she really born in April? There were a lot of suspicious things happening surrounding Katie’s pregnancy and Suri’s birth, which could either be chalked up to those wacky Scientologists or a different story of conception than the one we heard. So basically, a lot of people think that Chris Klein could have fathered Suri right before that breakup.

But it’s not 2005 anymore, and Katie is no longer under the spell of Tom Cruise and Tom Cruise’s cult. She is her own woman now, and it looks like she’s raising Suri to be her own woman as well. So naturally, Tom is horrified. He’s pissed that these rumors are still coming up, and he’s upset that the rumors could one day cause Suri to request a paternity test. Then, of course, there’s the possibility that Tom’s “unyielding need for control” would potentially cause him to refuse to take the paternity test that may or may not ever come up at all, and then what would happen to his relationship with Suri?

Look, I know this is sort of a silly story – it’s from the Enquirer, after all – but I think it’s interesting. The original story mentions rumors that Suri’s biological dad could be the aforementioned Chris Klein, or Katie’s Dawson’s Creek lover, Joshua Jackson, or possibly Josh Hartnett. There’s also the super fun thought that Katie could have been inseminated with the frozen sperm of L. Ron Hubbard, which is my personal favorite. But what do you think?

If Tom isn’t Suri’s father – I’m bad at babies, remember? – then I’d say Chris Klein is the only other possibility. It’s not that I think Suri doesn’t look anything like Tom, but I could definitely see where the Chris Klein rumors come from. Take a look at that punk:

A photo of Chris Klein

He and Suri have similar eyes, right? Yeah, I’d say that’s a solid possibility.

13 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I don’t know who this bloke is but his nose tip fucking freaks me out. I mean, what’s up with it?? It’s like a little ball inside his nose.

  • Another twist to the Cruise “rumor mill” is that he was never able to have children (i.e. shooting blanks). When she remarried, Nicole Kidman was able to have two babies right away. Even if Suri was concieved via sperm donor, those clinics (and you can be sure that Tom can afford the best of the best) have advanced their “matching” capabilities so that the child will have features that are very close to the parents. Suri does have Tom’s complexion but otherwise doesn’t look very much like him. Children will most always look like the natural father, while at the same time having some resemblance the mother (good example: Whitney Houston’s daugher…sadly). Suri’s eyes are Katie’s but her nose is different from Chris Klein’s.

    • yes, but Nicole kidman was pregnant (and miscarried) when Tom filed his surprise divorce papers, and she has said something to the effect of “well, the adoptions are a whole story that may someday be told”…. whatever that means!!!!

  • I always thought Suri looked like Tom Cruise’s cousin…that actor from In The Bedroom….maybe he was the sperm donor?

  • Why don’t u report on something important like how many meds was Holmes on before he killed everyone?

    • Because it’s a celebrity gossip site. The topics on here aren’t really intended to be “important”. There is a different thread on here with comments on the shooting.

    • If you’re coming here for “something important” you are doing the internet wrong.

      There are plenty of news sites. This is a gossip website.

      I can’t believe anyone has to take time out of their day to explain this to you.

    • Because giving Holmes a lot of attention is what he wants. He should go through his case, go to jail, and that be it. It shouldn’t even be televised. I suggest you read Roger Ebert’s recent post on mass shootings and the interview he did that the news purposely didn’t air after Columbine.

  • I have an inside source that has told me that Jackie Chan is Suri’s dad. Cruise allegedly purchased the girl from Chan during a rough patch in the Asian actor’s career.