Today's Evil Beet Gossip

George Lopez Spoofs Schwarzenegger Mistress, Remains Unfunny

Hey, look, another George Lopez ‘I’m not funny’ moment! How surprising!

In this particular segment of Lopez Tonight, George takes a swipe at Mildred Baena, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s most recent baby mama (and former housekeeper). Baena was identified earlier in the month as being the mother to a child that she and Schwarzenegger had out of wedlock, and while he was married to Maria Shriver. I’m sure you all know that, but in the off-chance that one of you happened to be hanging out under a rock with Arnold’s illegitimate kid for the last ten years or so, there it is.

Lopez, who I long thought to be kind of rude (I know, someone even ruder than me, who would have thought) has definitely crossed the line in this one, making it seem like Baena was the one who wooed Arnold away from his wife, forced him to have sex with her, and then intentionally gave birth to a baby whom she kept SECRET for all of these years. Yup, Mildred Baena, the home-wrecking instigator of illicit affairs who apparently had tons to gain.

I know that it totally takes two to have an affair, but Baena isn’t the only one who’s been identified as being an on-the-side girlfriend of Schwarzenegger’s, and that fact in itself makes me think that Arnold was the one who sought this woman out, changed her life forever, and fucked up most of what his wife, Maria Shriver, thought to be true. Though Baena apparently wasn’t innocent in her role in the scandal, I feel that Arnold is ultimately to blame – but I guess George Lopez WOULD take a swipe at Baena instead: he definitely does resemble an aging female housekeeper than he ever could a former Mr. Universe and successful actor or whatever. Just saying.