Tough question: who’s the bigger mess, Lindsay Lohan or Amanda Bynes? It’s a tough call, isn’t it? While Lindsay has been a mess for a lot longer, it seems like Amanda is catching up fast. Amanda hasn’t spent any time in jail yet, aside from that one night when she got her DUI, but she’s working on it, you know? Lindsay has a wider variety of f-ck ups, but on the whole, I think Amanda Bynes’ f-ck ups are more serious in that she’s consistently endangered the lives of other people. Basically, Lindsay’s been going for longer, but there’s no denying that Amanda is going hard. So who wins? Or, let me ask you this: who would you rather have as a driver, Lindsay or Amanda?
Another thing that makes this question a little more difficult is that while we know a whole lot about Lindsay’s family and her upbringing, we don’t know all that much about Amanda’s. All we have is one report that her parents were planning to move to L.A. to be with her just before she went to New York. That’s it. So we can’t really blame any of her current problems on her wacky parents like we can with Lindsay.
“You know, I’m a mother, and I feel that that’s for her mother to speak about, and not me, because people have spoken for my child and myself, so I really feel that’s for her parents to discuss and Amanda herself,” said Dina Lohan, who continued with some advice, “Just be around… It’s hard when your daughter’s not, you know, over 18, and you want to let them go… and they want to, you know, feel like they’re in control of themselves. So it’s a very strategic place for a parent to be, but she’ll be ok.”
Is it just me, or wouldn’t Dina Lohan telling you that your daughter will be ok be a lot like Abraham Lincoln telling you that the play you’re planning on seeing is totally awesome? Or like Tom Cruise telling you that you have a super cool church? Like, thanks for the encouragement, but that particular sentiment coming from you is just loaded with disaster.
But let’s just make our question official …