The American Music Awards happened and I don’t think anyone really cared that much, but here’s your outfit recap, just in case. Yeah, it’s a day late. Honestly, who really cares? We covered Katy Perry’s “is this offensive” Geisha performance, which was probably the most interesting thing of the whole night. So here’s the outfits, a touch late, but we can still have fun oooo-ing and aaaah-ing and WTF-ing. Which is what I’ll need your help with. I want you to pick the best, worst, and most WTF outfit of the night. Here we go!
I’m all for various modes of parenting so long as they work for you and they’re healthy for both mother and child. Breastfeeding is great – super nutritionally beneficial for the baby, helpful for moms trying to ~shed the baby weight~, etc. Alicia Silverstone is mad about breastfeeding (and also about chewing her food and then putting it in her 2-year-old son’s mouth like a bird) and has devised a sharing scheme to help moms who are unable to breastfeed.
Here’s the plan as she described it on her website:
A couple weeks ago, another mama I know gave birth to a son. She e-mailed to let me know how things were going, and she was beside herself. She’d tried to do everything so that this baby would have the healthiest, happiest start in life–she nourished herself during pregnancy with clean, kind foods; had a beautiful home birth; and planned to breastfeed from now until her son could say, “No thanks.” But because of a breast reduction surgery, she found she wouldn’t be able to make enough milk for him, no matter how much precious boobie time they spent together. She tried reaching out in her community for donor milk, but it was almost impossible to figure out what kind of lifestyle choices the donors had made. And after all that hard work keeping herself vibrant and healthy, she felt she had a right to demand better for her baby.
A lot of women unfortunately have a similar struggle, and there’s no reason why they shouldn’t be able to give their babies the most amazing start in life with clean, mean, glorious breast milk. And because we are a community of beautiful souls who recognize the importance of food as health, I say we help support those mamas and babies who need a hand during one of the most important times in their lives. Welcome to the Kind Mama Milk Share, a way for moms to connect with other moms in their area. If you have milk to share–post it here! If you are in need of milk–post it here! Think of all the babies we can help raise together! It goes without saying that common sense precautions should be taken.
The comments section on her site is FULL of mothers both offering to donate their LARGE supply of breast milk and others looking to have some shipped. There are talks of Fed Ex shipments, blood tests for HIV and hepatitis and more. It’s all rather… strange, which makes me think I might not be as progressive as I’d like to think. In theory, this is a wonderful idea that’s totally natural and also fosters a community among new mothers, but on the other hand… your baby is drinking someone else’s titty milk. I don’t know! I’m so torn!
What do you guys think?
It’s a vibrator. Alicia Silverstone wants to sell you a vibrator.
Here’s her pitch:
Ok, ladies– sometimes it’s nice to have a little extra…something…when you’re getting it on (solo, with your partner…whatever floats your boat). There is one personal massager company that’s actually Kinder than all the rest.
These vibrators from Leaf come in a bunch of different shapes, all inspired by nature. I like that they look natural and feminine…like leaves and flowers…not scary. Plus they’re made from phalate-free, super-soft (and safe) silicone, and they use rechargeable batteries. And they’re shipped to you in packaging that’s not only discrete, but made from recycled materials.
There’s a few different varieties so you can pick one that speaks to you. It’s nice to know that you can get your green on and your groove on at the same time!
It makes sense that a lady who feeds her child by chewing food and spitting it in his mouth would be into eco-friendly sex toys, but you know what doesn’t make sense? How a vibrator can be shaped like leaves and flowers.
Oh, but wait:
Who’s buying one, huh? Treat your genitals to a leaf! Go wild!*
*These are actually pretty cute and not at all terrifying, so I’d totally support you in this.