Oh no, it’s totally cool, universe, go ahead and keep ripping real love apart and then playing matchmaker for couples that don’t need to exist. Go right ahead, it’s fine. No skin off my back. No, just skin off my newly blackened heart*.
On the latest in the crumbling relationship between Johnny Depp and his girlfriend of fourteen years, Vanessa Paradis, it looks like the two former lovebirds are now living separately. Specifically, on separate continents:
French actress-singer Paradis, 39, has spent the last few days in Paris, where on Friday she shopped in the Marais district and went for a fitting at Chanel’s headquarters on Rue Cambon.
While Paradis is expected at Monday’s Paris premiere of her film Café de Flore, Depp, 48, has been keeping a low profile in Los Angeles. He was spotted sporting a fedora and driving a luxury sports car Thursday, and he showed up later that night at the Hollywood Museum, according to sources.
He’s due in New Mexico next month to start production on his new movie, The Lone Ranger.
Well, if that isn’t the straw that broke the camel’s back. I tell you, if that isn’t just the worst news that I have ever heard, the most heartbreaking thing … oh wait, apparently there’s a new quote from Vanessa where she explains that she doesn’t believe in soul mates:
French actress Vanessa Paradis has spoken about feeling “in the depths of myself” as her 14-year relationship with Hollywood star Johnny Depp is said to be on the brink of collapse.
Miss Paradis hinted at the strains on her in real life in interviews to promote her latest film.
The star, 39, who has two children with the Pirates Of The Caribbean star, was in Paris promoting Cafe De Flore, in which she plays a single mother.
The actress, who did not refer to Depp by name, claimed she didn’t believe in marriage or soulmates because “if you lose your soulmate everything is done for.”
She went on: “Cafe De Flore speaks of love, its joys, its pains and its dramas – to love and to lose. This story upset me, I was upside-down, in the depths of myself.”
She added: “The idea of a soulmate is beautiful and very romantic to talk about it in a movie or a song, but in reality, I find it scary.”
I’m so sorry, you guys. I’ll try to find some good news, I promise. I know it’s a lot to take that the man who said “marriage is from soul to soul, heart to heart” and his longtime lady love are on the road to … well, I guess no more heart and soul. This has gotten way too bleak, hasn’t it?
*I know that the heart doesn’t have skin, you guys. I know that. It just speaks to how heavy all these breakups are weighing on me that I’m talking about my heart being skinned. Which I know is impossible.