Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Blind Item: More on Beyonce’s Fake Pregnancy

A photo of Beyonce

You guys know I just don’t call someone out for a blind item unless I have a pretty good reason to believe I’m right. And this is one of those times:

She was brought in from outside the United States. She only speaks Spanish (or Portuguese?), and has a child who is approximately Kindergarten age. She is fairly attractive, looks like she is in her late twenties, and has thick, dark brown hair and medium-colored skin. You probably wouldn’t notice her if she was walking down the street. However, it doesn’t really matter what she looks like, as she is simply the Surrogate for a baby that is a genetic combination of the soon-to-be Mom and Dad.

The Surrogate is currently living on the Lower West Side of Manhattan with her first child in a very nice apartment. She is not married, and does not really know anyone in New York, but she does want to stay here once the birth is over.  The apartment is being paid for by the Couple. The Surrogate is well-cared for by a full-time staff person and there is always a doctor or nurse on call. She looks like she is approximately eight months pregnant, and is clearly much bigger than the Mom, who is simply playing pregnant.

By the way, the Mom was physically capable of bearing her own child, but she didn’t want to “ruin” her body.

Beyonce, honey, look. I think it’s pretty safe to say that the game is over. It’s ok if you fibbed a little, just tell us, all right? We won’t be mad. You won’t get in trouble. Just tell the truth from now on, all right?

Now here’s a little something to make you feel better:

2 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Beyonce was probably traumatized by the Easy-Bake oven she got for Xmas when she was a kid, so she’s out-sourcing her kid. No matter whether she ruins her body or not, she needs to get those thunder thighs of hers under control before she turns 30!

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