Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Beyonce

Beyonce Woke Fans Up At 8am To Tell Them To Go Vegan

beyonce vegan

Beyonce had the Beyhive all crazy over the weekend by teasing that she was going to make a “big announcement” during her appearance on Good Morning America on Monday. Lazy bitches across the country got up super early to watch this live, only to find out that it wasn’t a tour or a new album that was on Bey’s mind, but her diet. Specifically, she wanted you to know first thing Monday morning that she’s vegan and you should be, too.

Literally, the entire appearance was to try and sell that shitty 22-day vegan meal plan she’s been trying to hawk that people aren’t all that fond of, apparently. She spent the entire “video” claiming that being vegan was the only way she got her nutrition under control and that it has tightened her skin and made life all-around more wonderful. Basically a load of shit to try and sell crap that even she probably doesn’t actually eat. “I have to share this!” she exclaims completely unconvincingly. Gimme a break. Fuuuuuck that. Nope. BYE, Beyonce.

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Nicki Minaj & Beyonce’s “Feelin’ Myself” Video Is Amazing

nicki minaj feelin myself beyonce

Taylor Swift may have stolen the internet on Sunday night with the “Bad Blood” video premiere, but Nicki Minaj and Beyonce kinda just outdid her with the release of “Feelin’ Myself”, which I think you can see from the screencap above is all kinds of amazing.

Of course, if you want to see the whole thing, you have to subscribe to Jay-Z’s bullshit music streaming service, Tidal, which will run you a cool $9.99 a month. Or you can just troll YouTube for when fans upload the full thing there and watch it before it inevitably gets deleted.

As you can see from the screencap above, the full video consists of lots of Nicki & Bey eating burgers, having ~silly girl time~ and, well, feelin’ themselves. So there’s that.

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Beyonce releases ‘Die With You’ on Jay-Z’s TIDAL music service

beyonce

Jay Z‘s TIDAL – basically a try-hard chic version of Spotify – was unveiled earlier this month with a ridiculous business model and an even more ridiculous membership fee (about 4x that of Spotify). It’s clearly going to fail, but for now, Beyonce is trying to keep her man’s venture afloat by releasing ~exclusive~ material ONLY through TIDAL. Get your credit cards ready if you want to hear the entirety of ‘Die With You’.

Bey released the first teaser of the track on Facebook, directing everyone to head to TIDAL to buy it. Will you take the bait?

Die With You. Watch the full video on TIDAL.com

Posted by Beyoncé on Saturday, 4 April 2015

I’ve never been so wishy-washy over an artist in my life. Sometimes I absolutely love Beyonce and think she’s an absolute queen. Then she oversaturates the world with her presence and I need her to go the hell away for a long ass time to give us a break from her bullshit. It’s a difficult thing to reconcile, but just FYI, I’m in the “go away for a long time” phase at the moment.

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Kid Rock: ‘Beyonce’s not hot; I like skinny white women with big tits’

kid rock

Welp, whenever Kid Rock gives his astute opinions on matters of the heart, what can one do but sit back, listen and take time to properly reflect on the profound observations he lays at our feet? Kid’s latest diatribe involves Beyonce, and particularly how she’s totally not hot at all and he doesn’t get what all the fuss is about. However, he’s not hating – you’re free to like what you like, just as he’s free to chase his own dreams: white women with a low BMI and humungous breasts.

From Rolling Stone:

Rock sometimes seems like a right-wing politician catering to his base. He won’t play Europe or mainstream U.S. festivals, but he will play SeaWorld. His fans love it when he shouts things like “Fuck Radiohead” onstage or attacks mainstream pop. He’s “flabbergasted” by Beyoncé worship. “Beyoncé, to me, doesn’t have a fucking ‘Purple Rain,’ but she’s the biggest thing on Earth. How can you be that big without at least one ‘Sweet Home Alabama’ or ‘Old Time Rock & Roll’? People are like, ‘Beyoncé’s hot. Got a nice fucking ass.’ I’m like, ‘Cool, I like skinny white chicks with big tits.’ Doesn’t really fucking do much for me.”

Well, hey – at least he’s honest. Can’t fault him for that! And he – God help me for saying this – actually kinda has a point. Beyonce has had a lot of songs that people know, but is she a legend yet? Eh… debatable.

One more thing – don’t expect Kid to have a country career anytime soon!

Rock could have had a country career after his 2001 hit with Sheryl Crow, “Picture” — he is routinely asked to co-write with Nashville’s top songwriters – but he’s not interested. “In country, those award shows make your career?.?.?.?and I don’t suck dick,” he says. “I’ll tickle your balls a little bit. But I ain’t gonna suck your dick.”

LOL, okay, man. Whatever you say! I legit like Kid Rock – he seems like an absolute ass, but he’s hilarious and doesn’t give a shit what anyone thinks. You can’t help but find that enjoyable.

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Unretouched Beyonce photos leak and the internet has a meltdown

beyonce

Beyonce is known to many as the most beautiful woman in the world. And hey, there’s no denying that she is a good looking lady. However, she’s not quite as perfect as all the photos would have you believe – even those on her own Instagram. For today, a ton of unretouched photos from a 2013 photoshoot leaked, and the entire internet had a meltdown of epic proportions because… well, they’re kinda brutal.

The Beyhive lost their damn minds and started sending all kinds of threats and shit to the site that originally posted them, so they eventually took them down – but not before the rest of us grabbed a few. There were something like 100 or so of them! Obviouly the big deal is that – gasp! – Bey has pimples! And smile lines! And kind of a weirdly regular, albeit pretty, face!

beyonce unretouched

beyonce unretouched

beyonce unretouched

So there you have it – it’s ~the real~ Beyonce, with pimples and wrinkles and somewhat unflattering makeup. Do we all feel better about ourselves now?

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Kanye West was NOT happy with Beck’s Album of the Year Grammy win

kanye west beck

Remember in 2009, when Kanye West got himself in a shitload of trouble for rushing the stage during Taylor Swift‘s VMA acceptance speech? He pulled the same bullshit again at the 2015 Grammys, but in a jokey way, so it was totally hilarious instead of completely inappropriate, right?!

Beck won the coveted Album of the Year award at last night’s ceremony, beating out Kanye’s beloved Beyonce (the woman he wishes he was with instead of Kim but never had a chance). Agree or disagree with this result, most people – including, you know, the actual nominees – handled their loss with some amount of grace and police clapping. Kanye, who let’s be clear was NOT nominated in this category, rushed the stage to protest before quickly running offstage to uproarious laughter from the audience (and abject horror from Bey and Jay-Z):

Huh. Well yes, ha ha, that’s all very funny. Kanye’s learned from his mistakes! He has a sense of humour! All is well in the world, right?

Right?

Well, no, because after the broadcast ended, Kanye headed over to talk to correspondents at E!, where he tore their logo off the mic and went on a long-winded rant about how awful the Grammys are because giving Beck that Album of the Year award means that creativity isn’t being celebrated (because, you know, only Beyonce and Kanye and Jay-Z can be creative in the world) and yada yada.

“The Grammys, if they want real artists to come back, they need to stop playing with us. We ain’t gonna play with them no more. Flawless, Beyoncé video, and Beck needs to respect artistry and he should have given his award to Beyoncé.

And at this point, we tired of it because what happens is, when you keep on diminishing art, and not respecting the craft, and smacking people in the face after they deliver monumental feats of music, you’re disrespectful to inspiration. And we as musicians have to inspire people who go to work every day and they listen to that Beyoncé album, they feel like it takes them to another place, then they do this whole promotional event that, they’ll run the music over somebody’s speech, the artist, because they wanted commercial advertising.

And by the way, I got my wife, I got my daughter, and I got my clothing line, so I’m not gonna do nothing to put my daughter at risk, but I am here to fight for creativity. That’s the reason I didn’t say anything tonight. But y’all know what it meant when ‘Ye walks on that stage.”

I think Kim’s face says it all, here:

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Beyonce and Jay-Z are moving to LA!

beyonce jay-z blue ivy

Watch out, west coast – Jay-Z and Beyonce are coming your way! I guess they got tired of New York, because they’re looking for properties in Los Angeles and have already enrolled Blue Ivy in an elite private school. I feel like this move makes sense, especially with their new ~vegan lifestyle~ – so prepare for another set of celebs to move into the area!

From TMZ:

We’ve learned … Beyonce and Jay Z are currently living in a hotel in Beverly Hills and actively looking for an estate to buy on the westside of L.A., which includes Beverly Hills, Holmby Hills and Bel-Air. We’re told they have already discreetly looked at a number of homes, but so far none fit the bill.

We’ve also learned the famous couple enrolled their 3-year-old into a toddler program at an elite private school — we know which one but we’re not naming it. But we will tell you, the tuition is $15,080 a year.

We’re told Blue Ivy was admitted halfway through the school year, which is unusual. The school generally only accepts students at the beginning of the school year.

As for why they’re moving, sources connected with the couple tell us they want “a change in lifestyle.” You’ll re recall, Bey and Jay spent the summer in a $200K a month rental near Bev Hills.

We do not know but assume they will keep their New York digs.

I wouldn’t want to live in LA (I’m an east coast girl at heart), but if I was mega rich and could have properties on both coasts, I would definitely find a place in Malibu or in the Canyons cos they’re so nice. Ah, dreams.

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