Sad day today, everyone. Jack LaLanne, if you don’t know him, was the original Richard Simmons. Or if he wasn’t the original Richard Simmons, he was the earliest Richard Simmons that I know of because cripes, I’m only twenty-seven years old. There could have been a male exercise guru in the twenties or thirties, but guys, I just don’t know.
LaLanne, who was famous for being super fit and into juicers (also, remember those old commercials from The Black and White Era of television featuring facial exercises?), passed away last night at the ripe age of 96 years old. LaLanne died from complications of pneumonia, and at that age, ladies and gentlemen, that’s enough to do anyone in, really.
Jack was survived by his wife of fifty-one years, Elaine (Elaine LaLanne, I know, crazy right?) and his children, who were present throughout both his illness and subsequent death.
Apparently there’s much to be said about living healthy and taking good care of yourself. I decided seven months ago to quit smoking, and by virtue, stop killing myself, right? I’m not going to credit that to old pal Jack here, but I will say that hey – maybe I’ll live to ninety-five now, too. Unless I’m in a situation like The Notebook and I fall mad in love with someone that my life is fucked without, or, you know, or I end up having sex with Adrien Brody. Then we’ll have to change plans, but for now? I’m going to go the Lalanne route, you mark my words. Except for that juicer part. I’m not really a fan of juices.
RIP old friend.
You think they’ll bury him in a onesie?
I know him, yes right, he was formerly richard simmons. i hope he rest in peace