The other day Emily told you guys about the unlikely pairing of Marilyn Manson and Lana Del Rey. And then, a few days after that, she told you about Marilyn Manson being all buddy-buddy with Johnny Depp. Now? We have Marilyn Manson and the female-wannabe-Marilyn Manson, Taylor Momsen. I mean, she’s chalk-white and all knees and elbows like Manson, she’s got some serious eyeliner addiction—like Marilyn Manson!—and hell, her last name is even similar to Manson (Momsen, Manson, what-the-f-ck-ever). So I guess it’d make sense that these two would eventually cross paths in the music world, and here it is. They did. How ’bout it.

The above video is over eighteen minutes long, and while I freely admit that I watched the entire thing with no shame, I’ll also candidly tell you that I cringed throughout most of it, because while Marilyn Manson is pretty badass, he still kind of scares the goth-fearing sixth-grader in me. No, really: one of my very best friends turned all “goth” on me in sixth grade, and I’m going to be dead honest with you—I had no idea how to deal. No f-cking clue. She became all dark and black nail-polished and silver-spiky and all ‘Cake and Sodomy’, and it was a shock for me, alright? It was a shock. I dealt, and things were alright, but I’m not going to pretend that I was taken aback by all of it, all from the petite dress-wearing girl with the formerly honey-blonde hair, clear mascara, and Claire Danes smile.

Anyway. To make a long story short, Taylor appears around the 1:54 mark, OK?

Taylor took the stage at these, the 2012 Revolver Golden Gods Awards—the very same show where Johnny performed with good ol’ Mair later on in the set, and the audience went … well, ‘nuts’ wouldn’t exactly convey what I’m trying to say when ‘apathetic’ is more along the lines of what I mean … but they seemed to enjoy her well enough. Probably because at least half of them thought that a live goat would be disemboweled onstage while Taylor drew pentagrams and upside-down crosses on Marilyn’s bare ass with its blood. I mean, I know that’s what I see when I envision these two together, you know?

All I know is that it’s way better than picturing Manson and Barry Manilow performing side by side. Do you know how uncomfortable that crowd would be? Damn.

Really, as Sarah told you a couple of weeks ago, the BFF-ship between Johnny Depp and Marilyn Manson is not new at all. As Manson said, he and Johnny first met on the set of 21 Jump Street, where he was an extra, and the friendship started there. That means they’ve been friends for 24 years. That’s longer than I’ve been alive, you guys. So why am I referring to this as a “new BFF alert”?

It’s because they’ve just really started to come out with their friendship. I can’t remember ever seeing anything about these two dudes together, and it really is, as Sarah referred to it back when she first told you about this wacky friendship, some mighty intense f-ckery. In what world would a man like Johnny Depp and a man like Marilyn Manson make such close friends?

I have no idea, but in that world, Johnny Depp shows up at Marilyn Manson’s concert and plays guitar during a cover of “Sweet Dreams.”

And this wasn’t in that video, and I know because I suffered through it one more time just to check, but Marilyn had some sweet words to say about Johnny after the song was finished:

After running through the song “Sweet Dreams,” Manson, 43, shouted to the crowd, “If you don’t recognize my personal friend … my personal savior, my personal guitar hero … Johnny Depp!” The crowd roared its approval.

“My personal savior”? Goodness, this bromance must be more intense than I originally thought.

I’m so sorry, you guys. I know that when you started your day, when you got on your computer and came over here to Evil Beet to check out the goings on, it never even entered your mind that this was a possibility. I know it never entered mine. I actually wasn’t too sure we’d hear all that much about poor Lana Del Rey ever again, ever since her tour was postponed back in February. But here we are. And I’m not too sure how we got here.

By the way, that photo up there was taken backstage at an awards show in Germany last week. I have no idea what Barry Manilow has to do with anything, but that’s usually the case. However, you can see the new lovebirds, Lana and Marilyn Manson, up there, pressed close together. That’s something, isn’t it?

Here’s something else: the actual rumor itself. Be warned, it’s pretty racy!

Shock rocker Marilyn Manson has sparked rumors he’s dating rising star Lana Del Rey after they were spotted sneaking into a hotel together.

The pair hooked up at a restaurant in Berlin, Germany the night before the Echo Awards on Thursday and were seen leaving the eatery together in a mini-van after midnight.

Del Rey was booked into the city’s Concorde Hotel but was spotted arriving with Manson at his hotel, the Grand Hyatt, and they were then photographed sneaking into the elevator together, according to local publication B.Z.

OMG, scandal upon scandal!!!

But really, something about this just makes me feel all icky and gross, and I’m not quite sure what it is. While I do enjoy Lana Del Rey, I don’t love her to the point of having serious, serious issues with her taste in men like I would with other celebrities. And while Marilyn Manson generally gives me the willies, this still feels weird in a slightly different way …

Oh, God. I figured out what it is, why this is so gross to me: who’s going to tell poor little Taylor Momsen?

Image courtesy of Gawker

NSFW! NSFW! Marilyn Manson was seen entering Chateau Marmont with a masked lady. The only reason this is news? The lady’s peekaboo Silvio Liu dress (NSFW! NSFW!), exposing a fuzzy merkin where her hoo-hah would be. Are these two going steady, do you think?

Manson’s date is none other than performance artist Narcissister, a professionally-trained dancer and “living mannequin” who is never photographed without her mask.

Now, I know lowbrow performance art strikes anyone who has to work for a living (read: anybody who is finally out of art school) as uselessly presumptuous, but this girl has some game. She recently appeared in a special, family-friendly performance on America’s Got Talent:

Jump in for (NSFW! NSFW!) photos of Narcissister with her date, Marilyn Manson, who seems uncharacteristically humiliated. And take a look at more of her work—if you’re so inclined—at Narcissister dot com (NSFW! NSFW!).

(more…)

Just in case the word ‘crazy’ isn’t enough of a descriptor of what being in a relationship with Marilyn Manson is like, let these photos be indicative as to how nuts (or desperate to prove something to your mom) you have to be as a person romantically involved with the Manse.

A very blurry and, um, pointy Evan Rachel Wood is depicted in the NSFW photo gallery after the jump, and just as we were talking about how catatonic Lindsay Lohan’s ghostly dead nips are, Evan Rachel Wood’s are the opposite and are very … well, quite active.

Anyway, ALL nipples aside, can you just imagine the arguments between these two former lovebirds: ‘I’m artsy-noir.’ ‘NO BITCH, I’M artsy-noir.’ ‘Alright, well MY fake blood concoction is better than YOUR fake blood concoction.’ ‘SPAWN OF FUCK, I’ll SLICE you open from GROIN to GULLET with the medieval demon-slaying dagger that I’ve had surgically implanted in the shaft of my penis.’

Or, you know. Something.

(more…)

“He had a hand in raising me. I’m always gonna love that guy. He’s a genius, he’s an amazing artist.”

And by ‘Dad,’ I clearly mean ‘Marilyn Manson,’ because there are no other males allowed – did you hear me, you bitch, none! – in Evan Rachel Wood’s life, even if they are broken up. Ever.  He’ll cut you, you know.