Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Chris Brown Kind of Just Compared Himself to Jesus

A photo of Chris Brown

Ok, ok. Chris Brown posted this photo on Instagram last night. The caption was “Painting the way I feel today. Focus on what matters!” And here’s the photo:

A photo of Chris Brown

Whoa. Whoa. Hold up. Chris Brown painted a picture of Jesus on the cross because he was painting the way he feels. Are we all getting that? He seriously just did that.

This is so much worse than when he compared himself to Tupac. I mean, I know you guys know who Jesus is, but can we really just take a moment to consider this? Chris Brown considers himself to be a Christian. That means that he thinks Jesus was the son of God. Jesus is Lord. Just to bring it to a more casual place, Jesus was a super peaceful guy who just wanted everybody to chill out and love each other. Jesus was awesome! Does that sound anything like Chris Brown?

But I’m really not the person to be discussing this, guys. After all, I’m obviously one of the many people who crucified Chris. You know, because calling an asshole an asshole is just like crucifixion. I’m just one of those bitches who refuse to believe how great Chris Brown is, and thousands of years from now, when Chris Brown is celebrated and adored, I’m going to be just another poor, stupid soul who was too blind to realize what I witnessed. I’m so glad we could clear this up!

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  • Jesus is super-peaceful, but He punched Frank Ocean twice last week outside of an IHOP. Jesus clearly had his blinker on, and you can’t just swoop in and steal somebody’s parking space when they’ve indicated they are waiting.

  • It’s a good thing He is risen, cause otherwise He’d be rolling in his grave.
    I guess I missed the part of the Bible where Jesus said, “Beat ALL the women!”

  • Jesus, Chris Brown, not even in the same sentence should these two ever be mentioned. Brown doesn’t get it, at all, he’s too busy looking at his own reflection to care about other people.

  • What a waste of space. Can he just die already? Like, if he dropped dead tomorrow, I wouldn’t be sad at all. Not one bit.