Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Don’t Worry, We Haven’t Forgotten You … Uh …

photo of heidi montag pictures
What’s her name again? HEIDI MONTAG. Right. I have Crystal Harris on the brain from the earlier post about Holly Madison, and I couldn’t think of any other name than Crystal Harris. I mean, yeah, I guess Crystal and Heidi are about the same, really, and on the same level—the only difference is that Crystal’s going to be one rich bitch while Heidi will never be a rich bitch ever again.

This is what Heidi Montag looks like, for any of you who were wondering what thirty grand worth of plastic surgery would look like five years post-op.

What a great investment, huh? What kind of return are you getting on this shit, huh Heidi?

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  • This is,a song,for Mrs.Heidi Montag,and,the,name of,it is,called,Take Me To Hollywood,and I wrote,this rap song,to the instrumental,of a song,named,Excite Me,using,all of my very own,words/lyrics,and the song named,Excite Me,was originally sang,by the reggae singer,named,Sean Paul,so this is,my reggae song,that I have,written,to the instrumental,of the reggae song,named,Excite Me,that was originally,sang by,the singer,named,Sean Paul,using all,of my very own,words/lyrics,take it,Jolly,Miss/Ms,bye,now,oh I almost,forgot,to mention,that the,word,pronounced,as,Lay-Day,in,my very romantic,song,for,you means,Lady,take it Merrily,Mam,see ya.

    This,is my song,title,for,Mrs.Heidi Montag:Take Me To Hollywood

    This is my,introduction,before,my chorus,for her:

    Take,Me,To Hollywood,Lay-Day,everyday,any day,yo,Babe,I’ll,take,a,plane,to meet,ya,Babe,yo,Babe,girl,we’re,very great.

    This,is,my chorus,for,Mrs.Heidi Montag:

    I’ll,take,a,plane,to,see,you,Babe,on,Monday,Friday,to Saturday,I’ll,take,a,train,to,greet,you,babe,every weekend,girl,plus,every month,next,week,babe,girl,on Saturday,come,here,babe,girl,roll,with me,Take,Me,to Hollwood,sexy babe,any day,I’ll,bring some,Money,girl.

    Verse 1:

    I’ll,bring money,plus flowers,babe,every hour,girl,with powers,babe,pure,like,rain showers,when,I come,babe,every month,girl,let’s,shop around,in the towns,and city,where,you’re from,babe,in Hollywood,up,in the hills,babe,I chill,and hang,in a nice,place,I’ll,take you,there,girl,if you,come,here,I’ll take,you there,Honey,Babe,Happily,girl,you’re,welcomed,Sexy Babe,Shopping,all around,girl,you’re,gorgeous,everyday,clubbing,downtown,girl,I’m gorgeous,sexy babe,plus,babe,if,you’re,in town,pretty,babe,girl,come,see me,cause,I’m very,great,sexy babe,yo,girl,cause,I,like,thangs,honey,babe,I’ll,buy,you some,sexy,babe.

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