Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Lindsay Lohan Released from Rehab Early Because She Is JUST FINE, Thank You Very Much

Lindsay Lohan was released today from a UCLA Medical Center rehab after only 23 days because someone is bribing someone she’s all better. Apparently the doctors at UCLA thought the 90-day sentence originally imposed was positively excessive, and they convinced Judge Marsha Revel of that fact.

It turns out Lindsay Lohan isn’t really a drug addict. No, no. She was “misdiagnosed” with ADHD and prescribed Adderall, which caused her to exhibit the same symptoms as someone abusing meth. Now that she knows she doesn’t have ADHD, you can rest assured that Lindsay Lohan will never again touch Adderall, or any other upper, for that matter. Lindsay Lohan knows better. Lindsay Lohan would never.

LINDSAY LOHAN IS JUST FINE.

THANK GOD EVERYONE SEES THAT NOW.

Sheesh.

12 CommentsLeave a comment

  • OK, you seem awfully sure of the fact that Lilo was released prematurely on the word of a bribed Doctor. Despite presenting not one shred of evidence.

    The fact is that court ordered drug rehabilitation is a crock of shit: unless someone wants to stop drug use it’s unlikely to work. So why waste the time.

    Also have you read the previous blog entry by Emily regarding Joaquin Phoenix’s new film? Because she’s positively gushing about how cool it is to take cocaine in that previous entry.

    Presumably as long as it’s packaged into a nice documentary where the coolness can be portrayed it’s all good. Without all the uncool bits like withdrawals, addiction, personality changes and associated violence and emotional withdrawal from loved ones. I suppose as long as it’s shown to be super cool and something male hipster’s do then it’s OK to take drugs according to this blog?

    Just saying – it’s hilarious how bitchy you’re being about Lilo not getting proper treatment, especially when your simply in no situation to know jackshit about her and her supposed issues. You know, considering the previous entry about how super awesome it is to consume cocaine and be a drugged out Hollywood B-celeb.

      • screw that, this blog has gone from witty commentary on the world of celebrities to long “expert” rants about how the writers know best and this and that should be going on. and even the humor has lots it’s pzazz.

      • believe it or not, evilbeet used to be funny and lighthearted, aka a gossip blog, rather than a sting of posts where a few female writers bash other women celebrities over their drug use, sex life, weight or face.

        you may have misunderstood me, by “rants” i was referring to the blog writers, not your comment. i happen to agree with your comment, and have actually written the exact same thing a few weeks ago when sarah used her apparent education in psychiatry and law to tell us all why lilo should stay in rehab.

  • I agreed with Rippit the OggFrog. UCLA Neuropsychiatric Hospital is one of the best, but Evilbeet knows better. Very funny.

  • btw – this is a gossip site intended on making fun of people and GOSSIPING crazy shit about celebrities..it is not intentionally meant to care a great deal or truly inflict any kind of seriousness on or about someone. if you don’t like it here then don’t show up.. i am sure there are plenty of other warm fuzzy places you can go shit rainbows on…ones that have a heart.

  • Funny how she never noticed the ill effects of taking Adderall (spelling?) herself…

    Having been a crooked-doctor-going pill popper back in the days… some of us wearing diving weights under our clothing to convince the doctor, who knew damn well the real reason we wanted diet pills, that our “lard-asses” required a prescription of Dexedrine… Well, let’s just say that speed coupled with booze feels pretty damn good…. And I’m sure that wasn’t lost on Lindsay….

  • P.S. In fairness to both Lindsay and her doctor, though, extreme anxiety can convince you that you are ADD because you can’t focus on anything worth shit when you are in that state. And unless your doctor is wise and experienced, he or she might be convinced that you are ADD as well.

    I really hope Lindsay focuses on her anxiety and issues. That’s the only true cure for achieving balance and moderation.