Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Break Out Your Sun Lamp And Lock Away The Fritos And Razor Blades

Some dudes in England, and by “dudes” I mean “idiots, have come up with a mathematical formulation that pinpoints today, January 19th as the most depressing day of the year.  Components of the formula include the economy, holiday bills and the fact that it’s a Monday.  They predicted that up to 25% of the British workforce might call in sick to work today.  You know what depresses me?  That I can never get back the thirty-seven seconds I lost reading about these fuckwits.  Sorry to share the misery, but it is Blue Monday and I don’t want to be alone.

How can we combat this perfect storm of malaise?  I feel so…so powerless.

22 CommentsLeave a comment

  • 24 hours and 6 minutes until Barack Obama is inaugurated. How can this possibly be the most depressing day?

  • Maybe in England they have to call in sick but here in the USA it’s a holiday! Let’s all go to the beach and be depressed together. The real sun is so much better, you can use those razors to shave your bikini legs, and fritos are always better with a bit of crunchy sand

  • I live in Luleå, Sweden, on the 65th latitude, an hour away from the Arctic Circle ( which is on the 66th, btw. Anchorage is on the 61st).
    We have 5hrs of daylight, providing it’s not cloudy, cause then you’re f*cked. It’s minus 13 degrees Fahrenheit and the hair in your nostrils freeze within 0.1 seconds. Even the pidgeons throw themselves in front of trucks in an attempt to commit suicide!
    Those wankers in sunny Britain, should come an visit me, I’ll give them a personal tour of “the-worst-Monday-ever-imaginable”… and if they’re nice I’ll even throw in a tour of Santa Claus’s village.

  • i watched a very moving MLK day march go by my office this morning, and everyone i know is super excited about the inauguration. those brits just need something to look forward to.

  • She should take a page out of the Modonna Handbook on Million Selling Records: The more hoopla surronding your song, the better.

  • I have heard that before- our history teacher in HS would inform us what day every year was going to be the most depressing. I wouldnt call them fucktwits.

    Today is a little bit depressing actually- my credit card statement from the holidays came out last night and I dont have classes or work to distract me from all these little depressing issues that have been bothering me lately, but yes, Obama is on his way and that is enough to keep me sane =)

  • You’re joking? I had the best Monday of my life. Basically, my new boyfriend and I have spent the whole day in my room.

  • This is true! The reason it’s depressing is because it’s my sister’s birthday. She’s been depressing the shit out of me for decades!!! Now she’s depressing EVERYONE!

  • The article is an oversimplification of statistics, and is pretty idiotic. Of course most people aren’t depressed on some random day of the year. That said, the effect on people of the weather and darkness does make a difference. Ms Poppins, just because you have shorter days where you are doesn’t mean that only seven or eight hours of daylight (depending on where in the country you are – I get eight down here on the relatively sunny southeast coast) is great. I believe we’re roughly equivalent with Stockholm? And, although it was only cloudy where I live, half of the British Isles was still being bashed about by storms coming in from the Atlantic. So I think it’s fair to say that some people would have been affected.

    And MLK Day… Yeah, as others have said, this was for Britain. Why would we celebrate MLK Day?

    So, in conclusion, it’s a silly idea although not as lacking in merit as you’d think from a tabloid-style overview, and isolationist national outlooks won’t help you understand it.

  • You didn’t close the quote on the word idiot. I thought that was…. is the word I’m looking for idiotic? Nice forced rant.