Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Cynthia Nixon Is Still Talking About Homosexuality

A photo of Cynthia Nixon

Remember a couple of days ago when I told you guys all about how Cynthia Nixon believes that homosexuality, for some people, is a choice? There were a lot of different opinions on it because it was kind of a weird thing to say. Luckily for us, Cynthia is continuing to speak out on the topic, so let’s go ahead and analyze this some more, shall we?

The interviewer’s questions are bolded:

You’ve been quoted as saying about these two relationships in your life: “In terms of sexual orientation, I don’t really feel I’ve changed … I’ve been with men all my life and I’d never fallen in love with a woman. But when I did, it didn’t seem so strange. I’m just a woman in love with another woman.” I’m a bit confused. Were you a lesbian in a heterosexual relationship? Or are you now a heterosexual in a lesbian relationship? That quote seemed like you were fudging a bit.

It’s so not fudging. It’s so not. I think for gay people who feel 100 percent gay, it doesn’t make any sense. And for straight people who feel 100 percent straight, it doesn’t make any sense. I don’t pull out the “bisexual” word because nobody likes the bisexuals. Everybody likes to dump on the bisexuals.

But it is the “B” in LGBT.

I know. But we get no respect.

You just said “we,” so you must self-identify as one.

I just don’t like to pull out that word. But I do completely feel that when I was in relationships with men, I was in love and in lust with those men. And then I met Christine and I fell in love and lust with her. I am completely the same person and I was not walking around in some kind of fog. I just responded to the people in front of me the way I truly felt.

This whole thing just sort of bothers me, and judging by your comments and by other people’s comments around the web, it bothers a lot of other people as well. And I know that it’s her choice, and of course she can call herself whatever she wants to call herself, but it’s just bothersome, that’s all.

If she’s bisexual (and she is), then what’s so bad about being bisexual? And how awful is it that you don’t call yourself bisexual because “nobody likes the bisexuals,” how is that ok? Do you think if some dude who liked to sleep with other dudes said “I’m physically and emotionally attracted to men, but I don’t like to use the word ‘gay,’ because nobody likes the gays,” that it would be all right?

And I know that sexuality is a continuum, and there’s rarely such a thing as completely straight or completely gay, but listen. If you’re a woman who has only had relationships with men your whole life, and those relationships were fulfilling and you were happy and satisfied and you felt comfortable and so pleased with that, then that’s wonderful. Then if you meet a woman who you’re attracted to and you begin a relationship with her, that’s great too. I’m happy for you. But that’s not being a lesbian, that’s just not. That counts out all the other guys you’ve ever been with, and that’s not fair.

Not to mention, every lesbian I’ve ever met couldn’t even fathom the thought of enjoying a penis, at all, in any sense, ever.

To say that your sexuality is a choice is, in my opinion, a pretty risky thing to say. A kid could read that and go “oh, ok, I thought I was gay, but I’m going to go ahead and make a choice to be straight.” A crazy like Victoria Jackson could take that and run with it so hard. And I’m all for making your own choices and not letting other people define you, but Cynthia Nixon is just getting on my nerves with all this.

Thoughts?

Victoria Jackson: “Some People Thought I Was A Genius, Some People Thought I Was Retarded”

A photo of Victoria Jackson

In the past, we’ve talked about how former Saturday Night Live cast member Victoria Jackson is a total bigot who also might be insane. But listen. We haven’t seen anything yet.

In this amazing interview, we get to hear from Victoria herself, as well as her family. And please believe me when I say that the apple doesn’t fall far from the crazy tree.

Here’s how the article begins, ok? This is the opening paragraph:

Victoria Jackson doesn’t want to meet at her house. “The Nation of Islam wants to kill me,” she explains apologetically in her inimitable shrill voice. Instead, she picks up a reporter at a Miami-area strip mall. Her weathered Honda Civic is adorned with “Nobama,” Marco Rubio, and Tea Party bumper stickers, and inside, it smells like it’s been fumigated with sweet incense.

And it gets so, so much better.

Victoria’s driving technique: She hurtles through intersections and down side streets, holding a Flip cam to her face with her left hand. Steering with elbows and the occasional pinkie, she opens a Bible inscribed with her name and quotes Scripture. Then she turns the camera on a reporter riding shotgun, whom she suspects is a socialist. “Don’t you think that some people are on welfare from cradle to grave,” she demands, ploddingly, “because the government is encouraging them never to work?”

Her sense of humor: “What if we crashed and died on video?” she says, laughing wildly. “That would be the most viral video of the world! You’d be dead, but you’d have a really viral video!”

Victoria’s parents: Marlene Jackson pulls out a throne-like seat for a male visitor to the family’s modest Miami Shores home. “That’s the master’s chair,” Victoria’s mom declares cheerily. “The man is the master.”

Then she delivers cookies and Coca-Cola in old-timey bottles, just the way Victoria’s dad [Jim] likes them.

Like father, like daughter: Soon, Jim begins with booming recollections of his youth as a champion gymnast. “I’m homophobic,” he announces while describing why he doesn’t like to strip in male locker rooms. “I also don’t like fat people. Every time I see a 300-to 400-pound lady or a man sit down to stuff her face, I want to say, ‘No, you fool! You’re killing yourself!’”

Then he adds for good measure: “Our son is 300 pounds.”

Victoria on eating disorders: Jim Jackson believed his family had a gene that inclined them toward obesity. “He said I was ‘genetically inferior,’” Victoria says. “I think it made me nuts. That’s probably where my eating disorders came from.”

Are you as mesmerized as I am?  Then let’s continue, because I assure you, it only gets better from here.  Victoria’s dad makes a joke about how babies who have been aborted would have voted for Obama!  How can you deny yourself this?

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Sinead O’Connor Is Back with Her Husband Again

A photo of Sinead O'Connor

AGAIN, you guys! How many times is this going to happen? I didn’t even think you could have an on-again, off-again marriage, did you? But if anyone could prove me wrong on that, it’s Sinead O’Connor, because, according to her always glorious tweets, the happy couple has reunited. Again.

Yay. My sweet husband is coming home. Very happy girl. Must get pretty-fied by 8pm. Thank u God. Me love me sweet husband so bad. Yay!! : )

Sorry if too much info or too personal.. Just.. Me so happy. Wus sad without him. Love him rotten bad. So me all happy now.. Hurray!!!

YES I me happy!! Me nuh marry the man fi nuttin. Luv ‘im BAD. A true what God put together f*ck all can destroy

At least, I think she’s saying that she’s getting back together with her husband. Deciphering Sinead’s tweets is a science. A really really difficult science. For crazies.

Anyway, this makes the second time that she’s changed her mind about getting a divorce. To help make this a little more clear, I’ve put together a rough little timeline of Sinead’s current relationship. Ready?

- August 20, 2011: Sinead posts a blog entry on her website titled “Is Sinead About to Hump Her Truck?” and announces that she is “in desperate need of a very sweet sex-starved man.”

- October 21, 2011: Sinead announces that the search is off “as successful applicant has been appointed.”

- December 8, 2011: Sinead marries her boyfriend, Barry.

- December 26, 2011: Sinead announces that she and Barry are no longer together.

- January 4, 2012: Sinead announces that she and her husband are back together.

- January 11, 2012: Sinead receives psychiatric help after tweeting that she was in serious danger and needed to go back on her meds.

- January 13, 2012: Sinead blogs about her “innocent flower of a husband,” says the marriage is off again, claims that she will never be in another relationship again.

- January 17, 2012: Sinead checks herself into a hospital to receive treatment for depression, checks out three days later.

- January 25, 2012: Sinead tweets that her husband is coming home.

That exhausted me, just recapping everything, so I can’t imagine what it must be like to have lived it. Sinead’s crazy is going to have to settle down sometime soon, because it doesn’t seem like she can carry on like this forever. At least, I hope not.

Speaking of Sinead’s crazy, she has been tweeting while I’ve been blogging, and she just dropped this little bombshell:

Sinead O’Connor is now officially the happiest woman on earth. Thanks be to JAYSUS! And will from ten a.m Be protecting her tweets

Oh no. She’s saying that no one involved with the media will be allowed to view her tweets and that “any tweets appearing in papers will be traced and perpetrator blocked.” The good news is that I’m pretty certain that I won’t have any trouble sneaking in, and I doubt she’s referring to us friendly bloggers when she mentions that blocking business. The bad news is that now I’m going to have to have Sinead’s nonsensical, horribly written words all over my home page. The sacrifices I make for you guys, you wouldn’t believe.

Love It or Leave It: Rihanna’s New Tattoo

A photo of Rihanna

Look! Rihanna loves Tupac as much as I do! You can tell because of her classy new tattoo, which, in case you can’t read because of the light ink, says “Thug Life.” Rihanna got “Thug Life” tattooed across her knuckles. Can you imagine?

I don’t even know, you guys, this is just so crazy right now. That look on Rihanna’s face, her nails, her John Lennon t-shirt … is this real? Is this really happening? Did Rihanna really get a permanent tattoo that says Thug Life? Across her knuckles?

I guess she did, because she’s going on and on (and on) about it on Twitter:

All these bitches screaming that 2pac back #THUGLIFE

I #LOVE my new tattoo!!! Can’t wait for yall to see it!!! I got it in “Tibetan” this time!!! #approved

Err’body has an opinion, but yall know what yall can do with them!!! #THUGLIFE

I’m thinking I shoulda got a tear drop instead!!! #THUGLIFEmaybe next time

All eyes on Rih, betta picture me rollin’ #THUGLIFE

I can’t deny it, ima riot..u don’t wanna f*ck with me! #THUGLIFEhaaaaaaa

Also, when someone tweeted her with a very reasonable “lol you’re not a thug, stop it,” Rihanna replied with “shut up bitch, swallow!” Who talks like that? Do thugs talk like that? And is Rihanna being serious with this? I can never tell, because whenever Rihanna does anything, my response, without fail, is always “are you serious with this?”

Do you think Rihanna is truly a thug, or should I be mad at her for tastelessly ripping off the greatest rapper of all time?

Anthony Hopkins Is The Brightest Ray of Sunshine

A photo of Anthony Hopkins

Did you know that we don’t even have an Anthony Hopkins category here at Evil Beet? I really can’t tell if that’s bizarre because of how big Anthony Hopkins is, or if it’s completely understandable because it’s not too often that I’ve come across any gossip on this fella. But we can’t focus on the past anymore, we have to live in the now, you know? And now I’m going to share with you this lovely little interview that Anthony Hopkins did with the Guardian.

First though, did you know that Anthony Hopkins composes music? Because I didn’t, and also it’s kind of important for the interview. To get yourself in the proper mindset, here’s a piece of music that Anthony composed:

Did you love it? Now let’s get into the interview:

On being Sir Anthony Hopkins or just Tony: Just Tony. I don’t know why they gave me a knighthood – though it’s very nice of them – but I only ever use the title in the US. The Americans insist on it and get offended if I don’t.

On releasing an album of his music: I’ve been composing music all my life and if I’d been clever enough at school I would like to have gone to music college. As it was I had to settle for being an actor. It was Stella’s [his wife] idea to collect all the scores that were lying around gathering dust in drawers around the house and send them off. After they got played by the Dallas Symphony Orchestra, other people took notice and finally they’ve been recorded by the Birmingham Symphony Orchestra.

On conducting: That was originally the plan. But then I fell over in the bathroom of a hotel in Vienna and broke my ankle, so I couldn’t stand up for any length of time. It was probably just as well, though.

On the kind of conductor he would be: One who knew the names of every member of the orchestra and whose main advice was to get everyone to finish on time together. A conductor can’t be too arrogant with an orchestra and try to impose himself too much. There has to be mutual trust and respect. The same applies to film directors. I can’t stand directors who try to micro-manage everything. When it happens these days I just walk off set, saying if they don’t like the way I’m doing it they can get someone else.Life’s too short to deal with other people’s insecurities.

On moving to the U.S.: Many people talk of London as being the heart of the swinging 60s. It wasn’t for me. What I remember is the grey mist hanging over the Waterloo Road on a Wednesday afternoon. It was so depressing I moved to the land of Donald Duck.

When asked if he had to train himself not to blink as Hannibal Lecter: What a stupid question. You don’t need to train. You just keep your eyes open.

On his greatest achievement: Everything rather blends into one now. It was very nice to get an Oscar but now it just rusts and tarnishes on the sideboard near the TV. You can’t take any of it too seriously. Death comes to us all. Not long ago I was in Arlington cemetery by JFK’s grave and I thought how the great years of his presidency were just blown away like ashes. Nothing really is of any importance and there’s a peace in that.

His ideal night: Staying in and watching Mob Wives on TV. I don’t have many friends; I’m very much a loner. As a child I was very isolated and I’ve never been really close to anyone. Ask nothing, expect nothing. That’s my creed. We’re all just a bunch of sinners crashing around in the darkness.

Awesome, right?  “Death comes to us all” and “we’re all just a bunch of sinners crashing around in the darkness.” I say it’s awesome because I sort of love this man, and also because he so eloquently described my feelings for the past few days. Heidi Klum and Seal are getting divorced? It doesn’t matter, because death comes to us all and nothing really is of any importance. The magical Tilda Swinton wasn’t nominated for an Oscar? Who cares? We’re all just a bunch of sinners crashing around in the darkness anyway.

I hope you guys feel as optimistic as Anthony an I do right now.

You’ll Never Guess Who Blue Ivy Carter’s Godmother Is

photo of oprah pictures photos full length pics
Oh snap. You got it. It’s Oprah.

Media Takeout reports exclusively that Oprah was selected as Beyonce and Jay-Z’s baby’s godmother, while long-time friend of Jay-Z Tyran Smith was chosen as Blue Ivy’s godfather. No wasting time there in choosing suitable godparents. I mean, why not President and Michelle Obama? Why not Kate Middleton and Prince Harry? They just had to go full-gusto and choose one of the other most powerful people in the world to spiritually guide their little Blue Ivy? Alright then. Roll with it.

On a side note, this is something I’ve actually been wanting to talk about. I watched The Color Purple the other night for the 10,482nd time in my life, and it fully dawned on me that Oprah is a really good actress. She was fabulous in that movie. Why did she not do more in film? Why do the whole talk show-humanitarian-entrepreneur thing and completely bypass everything else when it was so clearly evident that she had a whole cornucopia of semi-untapped talent just waiting to overflow into the rest of the entertainment business? Was it because of the whole padlocked-kitchen thing? Was that too much of a distraction? Or did she just really, really enjoy being able to interview Tom Cruise (and replace set couches) time and time again? I don’t get it, guys. Oprah’s talents are so varied, and it’s hard to comprehend that she wouldn’t tap further into them for the greater good of the general public.

I don’t know. I guess that’s all I’ve got to say about Oprah, and Beyonce and Jay-Z’s kid. And The Color Purple – I do love that movie.

Watch This: Maurice Sendak Doesn’t Like Newt Gingrich, or Anybody, Really

“But Newt Gingrich is an idiot. …There is something so hopelessly gross and vile about him that it’s hard to take him seriously. So let’s not take him seriously.”

Maurice Sendak, author of Where The Wild Things Are, responds to Stephen Colbert’s assertion that “children don’t have a work ethic.”

I love Maurice Sendak. As you’ll recall, he “can’t stand” Gwyneth Paltrow, called Salman Rushdie a “flaccid f—khead,” and is glad Roald Dahl is dead. But Sendak is so nice! So it’s all very funny! He is basically the best ever.

Lately he doesn’t like Newt Gingrich either. Honestly, if Gingrich is just an “idiot,” he is getting off pretty light.

Sendak also dislikes “adults,” which pretty well wraps up most of the rest of humankind. Sendak doesn’t know who Vin Diesel is, but if he had an inkling, Sendak might dislike Vin Diesel, too. I mean, it’s a pretty good bet.

This whole Colbert interview is great. Sendak thinks a Where The Wild Things Are book and movie sequel would be, not only boring, but “the most boring idea imaginable!”

Sendak does call Colbert a “man of little imagination,” but I shared Sendak’s astonishment when Colbert went on to hold up a literal bag of dicks. Watch the interview. It’s amazing.