Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Looking Forward to An NSYNC Reunion?

A photo of NSYNC

Were you also looking forward to meeting a unicorn someday or perhaps having Edward Cullen fall in love with you? Because, according to JC, each of those things are just as likely as witnessing an NSYNC reunion. Which is to say that we will never witness an NSYNC reunion.

I know that it’s a little early to have your dreams crushed, but, just to drive the point home, here’s the news straight from the heartthrob‘s mouth:

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Is anyone else as devastated as I am?

Oh Dear God: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Broke Up?!

A photo of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart

If this is true, then I can’t. I just can’t. I can’t believe in true love, I can’t even believe in happiness. I can’t even believe in myself. Without the love of R-Patz and K-Stew in the world, then what will become of us all?

Before I get myself too worked up again, here’s the story from the National Enquirer:

“Just two days after the couple was inducted into Hollywood’s legendary Grauman’s Chinese Theatre, Robert – who’d been having second thoughts about their relationship – hit Kristen with the news that he’s ending it. They kept on smiling at the Los Angeles premiere but Robert was an emotional wreck – and so was Kristen, who never saw the breakup coming. Explaining his reasoning, Rob told Kristen he adores her, but feels that their romance blossomed only because they’d been thrown together as on-screen lovers for nearly four years. Rob felt it was time to explore other relationships and move on.”

Even though Kristen’s devastated, the source added, she knows they’ve got to put on happy faces to promote “Breaking Dawn” – and the sequel next year.

I refuse to believe that this is true. One, because if it is true, then I would be so utterly devastated, and two, Robert would never break up with Kristen. He’s too much of a sensitive little flower to do that. No, if these two were to break up in reality, it would be all Kristen, and it would be so, so heartbreaking.

What do you guys think: are these guys still the picture of true romance or what?

Just in Case You Missed The Season Premiere of Kourtney and Kim Take New York

A photo of Kim Kardashian
Shame on you for missing such an important program! Shame on you for not supporting Kim Kardashian in this, her moment of need! Shame on you for finding something else to do with your time besides supporting this lovable and wholesome family!

But, just because I love you guys, here’s a gallery that basically sums up what happened on last night’s show, thanks to Amy Grindhouse. You’re welcome, and do better next week!

You Are So Grounded, Justin Bieber!

A photo of Justin Bieber

The Biebz has some seriously awful spending habits. Like, sure, getting a private screening of Titanic for your lady is sweet, and who wouldn’t love to have his $25,000 Stewie necklace, but sometimes enough is enough. Luckily, Justin is still just 17 years old, so when he does something stupid, he can still get his minor ass grounded.

From the National Enquirer via Celebitchy:

Justin Bieber has had his driver’s license suspended – by his overprotective mom! The teen pop star’s driving privileges shifted into neutral after his mom, Pattie Mallette, grounded him for splurging on a $160,000 custom-made hot-rod!

“Pattie blew a gasket when she learned about Justin’s wild spending spree,” a source disclosed. “As a result, she is forbidding him from driving until he turns 18, unless he’s accompanied by an adult chaperon.”

During a recent visit to England, the 17 year-old… singer reportedly treated himself to a customized “Project Kahn” Range Rover, complete with a souped-up Cosworth engine, custom paint job and a sound system worth tens of thousands of dollars.

The underage hot-rodder already owns a Batman-themed customized Cadillac and a Ferrari…

“Pattie is trying to get Justin’s wild spending under control,” added the source.

Does anyone else think it’s weird that Justin was able to spend $160,000 on a car without his mom knowing? I couldn’t spend $20 without my mom knowing when I was his age. I got an allowance for doing chores, and every Friday when my mom gave me my $10, she’d tell me not to spend it on anything stupid. I never did, of course – for the most part, my money went to form my impressive collection of Bowie albums and memorabilia – but it was always said. Now, I know that I’m not a superstar, I’m not the legend that Justin Bieber is, but don’t you think that his mom could have at least laid down the law a little before it got to this point?

Quotables: Adele Had A Revelation

A photo of Adele

“It’s so hard for me to share my feelings. I’ve actually never told a guy that I loved him. I’ve felt them; I just can’t say them. My friend recently convinced me how important it is for guys to know that. I wound up writing letters to all the men I’ve been with, telling them that I did feel that for them. Well, except for the one guy who I wrote and was like, ‘You’re a f*cking c*nt.’”

- Adele tells Cosmopolitan details about her seemingly sordid love life.

Poor Adele. Girl has some issues that are made painfully obvious in her music (and not “painfully obvious” like “OMG, please,” but “painfully obvious” like “ow, Adele, I can honestly feel your pain”), but it’s good that she seems to be working things out, right?

Miley Cyrus Isn’t Really A Stoner, You Guys

A photo of Kelly Osbourne and Miley Cyrus

It was a joke, ok? Miley was all “I smoke way too much weed, LOL,” and everybody took her seriously. Everyone was just so eager to believe that Miley could be into drugs. Well, you should all be ashamed of yourselves, and Kelly Osbourne feels very strongly about that. You can tell because she discussed this fiasco on her Twitter:

let me make something very clear after Miley Cyrus salvia incident we started calling her bob miley as a JOKE! the cake was also A JOKE! it makes me sick that Miley Cyrus so called ‘friends’ would sell her out and lead people 2 believe she is someone that she is not!

u guys if Miley Cyrus is not recording/filming/touring she is works everyday how could she possible do all that if she was a stoner! #think

Seriously though, you know what I think is ridiculous? The notion that Miley isn’t a stoner. Does Kelly think we’re ignorant? Does she think that no one has ever seen a photo of Miley? And another thing: I find it offensive to say that people who smoke weed can’t also be hardworking folk. I know there’s a stereotype, but I’ve seen some people do amazing work while under the influence of marijuana. Take, for example, Montel Williams:

Anne Hathaway Got Engaged to Somebody Boring

Photo: Anne Hathaway with Adam Shulman 12 months ago

Yay! Anne Hathaway is engaged! Can you believe it?

She has been dating her now-fiancé, actor Adam Shulman, for three years. I know! It’s nuts! It’s like everyone totally forgot about him while he was busy being all supportive and loyal and steadfast or whatever. (Meanwhile, Hathaway’s jerk ex Raffaello Follieri has been stewing in prison.)

Hathaway describes this Shulman character as “mellow,” adding, “Mellow doesn’t always make for a good story, but it makes for a good life.”

And I have to agree with Anne, here: “mellow” does not make for a good story. I was excited for Miss Hathaway two paragraphs ago, and now I am falling asleep. Zzz. Of course, Emily was briefly convinced that Hathaway’s boyfriend is a Satanist. We can only hope! Cross your fingers!