2Kim Kardashian And Kris Humphries Are Officially Divorced!

The marriage was a 72-day sham that lasted long enough for the check to clear in the bank, but some idiots still want to convince us that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries‘ love was real and their divorce was an unexpected travesty – even though she didn’t even want to go on her honeymoon with him. Yeah, and I’m the queen of England. In any case, the pair came face to face in court today and someone’s told TMZ (or some TMZ intern has dreamed it up) that Kim was excited to see Kris because she still has a whole lot of love for him. Uh…

Sources very close to Kim tell TMZ … Kim is actually looking forward to seeing him.  She’s saying she does indeed still love him as a person, acknowledging, “We just didn’t work as a couple.”

We’re told Kim has actually reached out to Kris numerous times, but he never responded.

Kim is saying they have “unfinished business” and need to talk things out so they can truly move on.

This is probably complete and utter bullshit, but even if it’s true, I think it’s pretty clear it’s all one-sided and there’s definitely no love lost, from Kris’ perspective.

In any case, we can all celebrate now because the case is closed and they are now officially divorced!

Kim Kardashian is officially a single woman … because the judge dissolved her marriage to Kris Humphries in today’s court hearing … and we’ve learned Kris walked away with NOTHING.

Here’s what sources connected with the case tell TMZ:

– Kris gets NO money from Kim.  As we’ve reported … he had previously demanded $7 mil.

– Kris dropped his demand for an annulment based on fraud.

– Each party will pay their own attorney’s fees.

This is not just a settlement. It’s a WIN for Kim and her lawyer, disso-queen Laura Wasser.

Sounds good to me, especially if it means we never have to hear about the two of them again. Good riddance!

April 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

5Kim K Didn’t Want To Go On Her Honeymoon With Kris Humphries And Now He’s Using It Against Her

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are dragging up all kinds of unresolved stuff in their settlement conferences on this long and annoying road to divorce. Humphries is alleging that their wedding was a scam. Which is why he’s bringing up this honeymoon thing. From The Daily Mail:

Kim Kardashian did not want to go on honeymoon with Kris Humphries, it has been reported.

Kris was the one to push for the honeymoon. Kim didn’t want to go on the honeymoon because they were scheduled to move to New York City to begin filming Kourtney & Kim Take New York,’ a source told Radar Online.

‘She also complained she was stressed out from planning the wedding. Kris was stunned and very hurt because it was important to him that they go away. Remember, he wasn’t playing basketball at the time because of the NBA strike, and they wouldn’t be able to take one for a year.’

The insider then claimed that Kim hired a photographer to come and snap photos of the couple while they soaked up the sun.

‘Kim finally relented. Kris was absolutely dumbfounded when a photographer appeared out of nowhere and started taking pics of them by the pool,’ the source said. ‘Kim happily posed, and Kris realised her camp had arranged it.’

At her divorce deposition Kim confessed that she was against going on the holiday, which Kris is allegedly using as part of his case against the 32-year-old reality star, claiming their marriage was fraud.

Kim would of course never fake anything regarding her life or her show (as if there’s a distinction.)

Ray J, you can have her.

April 18, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

8Producer Confirms What We All Knew: Kardashian Show Is Fake

Kim Kardashian is at war with ex Kris Humphries. Humphries is alleging that he’s being screwed over because their wedding was a sham and that Keeping Up With The Kardashians was edited to make him look bad.

Kardashian producer Russell Jay, came clean in court. And it’s soooo good. From Radar Online:

[Jay] says there are at least two scenes that were “scripted, reshot or edited” to make Kris look like the villain after Kim decided she wanted a divorce. Jay said in the court documents that Kim not only knew about Kris’ “surprise” proposal, but insisted producers reshoot the scene because “she didn’t like how her face looked in the first take,” according to Life & Style magazine. The magazine reports Russell reveals that a scene where Kim confesses to her mother, Kris Jenner, that she was having trouble in her marriage with Kris was actually shot after she filed for divorce in 2011.

RadarOnline.com exclusively reported about this scene being shot in December, after the trip to Dubai that took place in October before the spilt.

Jay also said that a scene where Kim is furious because Kris is having a party in their hotel room while she was out of town was faked too, and Kim was actually in the hotel and knew everything that was happening!

These can’t be the only parts of the show that were scripted. What other scenes and Kardashian moments do you think were faked?

March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives

7Kris Humphries Is After a Pound of Flesh From Kim Kardashian

Don’t ever get famous, or at least make sure you don’t have a family when you do because they will run their traps to any press outlet that will listen. That’s what’s going on now with Kris Humphries‘ aunt and uncle (like, why bother?) – he claims that Kris wants revenge against she-devil and couch-ass haver Kim Kardashian. In fact, he actually wants a “pound of flesh” from her, which I’m sure she’ll be glad to donate ten-fold, if all the bullshit about her horror at her pregnancy weight gain are to be believed.

But his aunt Dedria said yesterday: “It was a sham. My understanding of marriage is people are going to give it more than 72 days unless there’s serious abuse.”

Dedria, 55, added at her home in Lansing, Michigan: “If I felt somebody had duped me and used me in front of the whole world, I would be very angry.”

If the marriage is annulled, Kris could argue that the pre-nuptial agreement was not legitimate — and he would be freed from the confidentiality clause which prevents him from publicly shaming his ex.

Dedria declared: “An annulment says it wasn’t valid in the first place. She should admit that it was a sham at the very least.”

Her husband, Kris’s uncle Mike, 60, revealed that Kris’ hard line in the divorce battle is because he wants REVENGE.

He said: “I can just see him wanting a pound of flesh back. I believe he wants payback.”

Was the marriage a sham? Obviously. Is Kris Humphries the biggest dope to ever roam planet earth? Definitely. Who in the hell is stupid enough to believe that it’s true love with Kim Kardashian? An idiot, that’s who. She’s keeping that expensive ass ring and now she’s having Kanye’s baby, the end.

But seriously, Aunt Dedria and Uncle Mike? Cool it. Kris is a big enough dolt on his own without you helping him look worse.

March 12, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer

9Kris Humphries’ Lawyer Dumped Him

Kris Humphries and Lindsay Lohan have something in common: both got dumped by their lawyers. Marshall Waller, lawyer of said alpaca, played the irreconcilable differences card and split. Oh man, ouch. And on Valentine’s Day, too! Just for fun, since this is what I consider fun, I Googled Marshall Waller to see who else he’s represented and found reviews of him, like a Yelp for lawyers. Most of them favorable! And in case you were wondering, he charges $295 – $525 per hour. Super!

Hopefully Humphries can find a new lawyer soon so this poor horrible nightmare for Kim “My Face Looks Super Different But I Haven’t Done Anything To It” Kardashian and Kanye “This Is Why People Hate Me” West can end. Ms. Kardashian said that she really, really wants to be legally divorced before her baby is born, to which everyone says, “Lol, no, that’s not how the law works, sorry.”

Which side are you rooting for? I’m guessing most of you are going to comment with, “neither.”

Via Eonline.

February 15, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

14Kris Jenner Won’t Let Kim Kardashian Get That Annulment

Well, goodness gracious! All this time that Kris Humphries has been pushing for an annulment, Kim Kardashian has been perfectly willing to agree to his terms – the marriage was a fraud, y’all – but she hasn’t yet. And you know why? It’s because Kris Jenner is the worst mom ever, that’s why.

From Radar:

Kim Kardashian is willing to give her estranged husband, NBA star Kris Humphries, an annulment on the grounds that the marriage is fraudulent, but her momager, Kris Jenner, has shot it down because she fears that it will damage the Kardashian brand, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

“Kim has made it known that she is ready to give Kris an annulmentbecause she just wants to move on with her life. If she doesn’t give an annulment, Kim will be forced to testify at a trial after her baby is born this summer, which is the last thing she will want to do,” a source told RadarOnline.com exclusively.

“Kim’s baby daddy, Kanye West, doesn’t understand why she hasn’t already just given Kris the annulment. Kim’s momager, Kris Jenner is adamantly protesting to her daughter’s idea because of the possible ramifications it could have for the Kardashian empire. Kris is concerned about the negative press and criticism Kim will get if she goes through with it. Kris’ main concern is how E! would react to Kim’s decision since the network aired their wedding special,” the insider added.

I still don’t understand this seemingly constant fear of “damaging the brand.” It’s not like this is the thing that’s going to make or break the Kardashians. No, the Kardashians have move passed that point, and now they will live on regardless. Like cockroaches.

But still, would an annulment really do more damage than that tiny little Kimye baby at the divorce trial?

January 18, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Emily