Katy Perry just released a screengrab from her upcoming video “Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)” and it’s pretty tragic. It is better than the whole alien bit she just did and wayyyy better than the time she shot whipped cream out of her boobs, but it’s still a miss in my book.
I know, I know, I hate Katy Perry’s tired guts and I can’t stop talking about it, but I just don’t get this chick. Sure, “Teenage Dream” was fun and so was “California Gurls,” but fun is different than really good and dressing up like a teenage dork in 2011? Snooze. Neither fun nor good.
Do you guys think this video theme has potential or can we just be done with her now, please?
May 12, 2011 at 5:30 am by Molls
First of all, let me preface this by saying that I think artichokes are fucking disgusting. There are not – ARE NOT – many foods I dislike, but artichokes are on that list, along with liver, grapefruit, and salmon. But despite my aversion to artichokes, Katy Perry loves them. And not only does she love them, she IDENTIFIES with them, calling them ‘magical.’
For her sit with Vanity Fair magazine, Katy tried really hard to be relatable, and despite my general ambivalence toward Katy Perry, she actually made some pretty valid points. Aside from the bizarre vegetable-and-religion ranting, anyway. Here are some of her better quotes from the interview:
“My career is like an artichoke. People might think that the leaves are tasty and buttered up and delicious, and they don’t even know that there’s something magical hidden at the base of it. There’s a whole other side [of me] that people didn’t know existed.”
(Am I the only one who laughs when they hear the word ‘base’? As in, like, the ‘base’ of the penis? Sorry, my inner thirteen-year-old is showing.)
“I didn’t have a childhood. [I wasn't read any books] except the Bible, and [I wasn't] allowed to say ‘deviled eggs’ or ‘Dirt Devil’.”
Wow. Freaky ma, huh?
“I think sometimes when children grow up, their parents grow up. Mine grew up with me. We coexist. I don’t try to change them anymore, and I don’t think they try to change me. We agree to disagree. They’re excited about [my success]. They’re happy that things are going well for their three children and that they’re not on drugs. Or in prison.”
But so, so disappointed that they’re not in a David Koresh-like cult.
“At this point, [spiritually] I’m just kind of a drifter. I’m open to possibility…. My sponge is so big and wide and I’m soaking everything up and my mind has been radically expanded. Just being around different cultures and people and their opinions and perspectives. Just looking into the sky.”
Girl’s parents are going to have a field day with that one. And ROFLCOPTER @ her sponge being so big and wide and soaking everything up.
“I don’t care what people say about my relationship; I don’t care what they say about my boobs. People are buying my songs; I have a sold-out tour. I’m getting incredible feedback from my music. … I don’t take anything for granted. There are 500 other girls right behind me. And I know that, because I was one of them. I remember what it’s like to be someone who’s always trying to get there—sending out tons of e-mails … trying to connect with some person who could connect me with some other person. And I wouldn’t be working at this pace now if I didn’t truly know that fame is fleeting.”
Good point, girl. The rest of the interview was pretty crazy, but you brought it all together at the end. Kudos.
May 4, 2011 at 5:30 am by Sarah
10Katy Perry Doesn’t Know How She Feels About Osama Bin Laden’s Death Because She’s Not a Real Person
I’ve been on a real Katy Perry tear lately, but the girl deserves it. Check out the wide range of emotions she went through in public on her Twitter account after finding out that Osama Bin Laden had been captured and immediately killed by someone working on behalf of the United States.
First she was all, “AMERICA, FUCK YEAH,” which goes along really well with her Christian robot past and then three minutes later she was creating conspiracy theories. Two minutes after that she was worried about the troops and then finally, a whole thirteen minutes after her initial Tweet, she decided to get all zen on us and point out that maybe we shouldn’t have killed Bin Laden (you know, at least before we could pump him for information and torture the douchenozzle in public.) This would be one of the only times I think it’s okay to casually throw around the word bipolar.
I am happy to allow for a certain amount of ignorance at home. Everyone’s uninformed about something. I can’t blame the girl for not being completely aware of all world events, but it reads like she pulled the trigger on the “FUCK YEAH,” stuff and then all the layers of the situation started to sink into her teenage dreamin’ brain. Any sane person looking at her train of thought in these Tweets can tell that she has no idea what the hell happened last night or over the course of the last decade.
Shut up, Katy Perry. No one expects you to do anything more than stand around and look pretty.
May 2, 2011 at 7:30 am by Molls
First of all, you cannot tell me that this girl has a good voice live. Sure, she’s got an impressive range, but what good does that do her if her actual tone is awful? It just seems like she’s got this great big voice and no real sense of style.
Secondly, speaking of style, I was so distracted by the split up the front of her dress and that the diaper-ish bikini bottoms underneath kept popping out as she moved her legs. And it’s clipped together by what? A sparkly orange slice? I’m pantless and wearing a t-shirt that says “This is What Cool Looks Like,” on the front of it, and even I can tell you that that outfit’s a boiling hot mess.
April 30, 2011 at 3:30 pm by Molls
So Katy Perry and Kanye West performed their latest single on American Idol last night, and as I’ve probably said before, I haven’t watched a single episode this year. However? My mom called me in the middle of this performance and asked me who the hell these weird-ass people were, lip-syncing and trudging all over the stage, singing about aliens – and I just KNEW that she was talking about Katy and Kanye.
As for my mom, I’m not sure if she understood what was really happening on stage, and maybe she liked it on the whole, but I also sometimes wonder if I’m not adopted. See, my mom’s a big Lady Gaga fan, and I KNOW that shit didn’t get passed down to me.
April 22, 2011 at 4:30 am by Sarah
Man, Russell Brand sure is in love with that Katy Perry, huh? You can tell because he never talks about anything else. Well, in this little interview, he manages to stop with all his love claptrap and focus in on Katy’s uterus, or more specifically, the poor handful of humans who will soon be expelled from Katy’s uterus:
“I love children. I am very much looking forward to becoming a dad. Who knows when? Soon I hope. I really love children. I think when I’m among children is when I feel most liberated.”
“I go nuts with children. When I’m around my friends’ children, I jazz them kids up, I swear at them, I get them all worked up, I say crazy stuff to them. I fill their heads with nonsense and then leave them.”
“I secretly want to [move back to England]. I have a fear of hearing my American children speak to me in American accents.”
I was on Russell’s side, I really was. I thought he was going to keep his life turned around and become such a strong, beautiful husband and father. But those people who come in when you have a kid and get them bouncing off the walls and then peace out? Fuck those people. I’m taking back a sliver of my love, Russell. Pull it together.