Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Katy Perry

Blind Items, Revealed!

Today is a magical day. Or, well, yesterday was a magical day, but Sarah and I were busy celebrating America’s birthday, so we’re just getting to the magic today. See, yesterday CDAN revealed tons and tons of blind items. Let’s stop with the preamble and get right to those, all right?

This A list celebrity and former singer who seems to always wear sunglasses was out over the weekend when she stopped to watch a woman on the street singing for money. The celebrity said, “You are better than I ever was. Honestly, so is everyone.” She then actually laughed and dropped $500 into the bucket.

Who could that be? Any guesses? You don’t have to guess, because we already know it was Victoria Beckham! See how fun this is? It’s only just beginning!

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Quotables: Katy Perry Wants to Be Just Like Madonna

A photo of Katy Perry

“I think Madonna, especially in the beginning of her career when she was laying the foundation, was evolving every single time and giving a new visual and a new idea to the public. She kept everybody interested because you never knew what she was going to do next, but whatever she delivered was a solid product. I just hope to be the same. I hope to continually make people interested and hopefully in 10 years look back and have written songs that have become timeless.”

Despite how ridiculous Madonna is, it’s not hard to see why a newer singer like Katy Perry would want to be like her. Madonna had her first hit single when she was 24, and here she is, touring around the world and exposing her no-no zones at 53. She’s out of her mind, but she’s still a superstar.

But does Katy Perry have a chance of enjoying a similar career? I really, really don’t think so. I mean, can you see Katy Perry releasing albums thirty years from now? A 57-year-old Katy Perry strutting around, singing “I Kissed A Girl” while millions of people went wild over her? Does she really have that sort of staying power?

Love It or Leave It: Katy Perry Almost Had It Right

A photo of Katy Perry

Here’s a photo of what Katy Perry wore to the Part of Me movie premiere. I absolutely love it. I love it so, so much. It’s definitely, without a doubt, my favorite thing that Katy’s ever worn. That amazing dress, and the matching shoes and lipstick? It’s perfect. I could go on and on about this dress all day, but I won’t.

I won’t because Katy Perry ruined it all by wearing this hot mess on her way to the airport:

A photo of Katy Perry

It does look comfortable, but at what cost?

Here’s a closer shot of the dress and the leggings:

A photo of Katy Perry

The only thing I understand about these photos is that Katy is in her dark place. Perhaps she’s coming up with beautiful, moving songs in her head. Perhaps she’s just wasted. Who can tell? I’m not sure, but with an outfit as horrendous as this one, I really don’t want to analyze it hard enough to find out.

Katy Perry Is Taking A Break

A photo of Katy Perry

From Contact Music:

Katy Perry is taking a break from showbiz.

The 27-year-old singer reportedly wants to step back from her career and take time to properly recover from the breakdown of her marriage to Russell Brand last year.

According to the Daily Mirror newspaper, she said: ”I need to let my heart heal.”

Katy spent much of her 14-month marriage on her world tour and has hinted that her career was one of the causes for the split.

She said: ”For a modern woman, it is important to be supported and that there is equality in every aspect.”

Katy – who is now dating Florence + the Machine guitarist Dan Aykroyd – recently insisted she doesn’t regret her failed relationship with Russell, 37.

She said: ”Everybody asks me if I regret something, they ask me if it’s going to be that one moment [her marriage].

”Actually it’s really a lesson learned and it’s super valuable, I could not buy this lesson.

”And I apply it to my life, I learn and a lot of the time, I get really good material for my songs.”

The brunette beauty was unsure if she wanted to open up about her marital troubles in her upcoming documentary film ‘Katy Perry: Part of Me’ but ultimately wanted to be honest about her life.

She said: ”The whole movie is about overcoming obstacles, overcoming my family, my set of rules and belief systems.”

OH DEAR GOD NO. You can’t leave us like this, Katy Perry! Not when I’ve gone over two years with hearing your annoyingly catchy songs everywhere I go! What would I do without you to tell me that I’m a firework, and what would I strive for if you weren’t there to tell me about such beautiful things as teenage dreams and California gurls? How can I survive in this world without you?!

Katy Perry Will Never Learn

A photo of Katy Perry

From Star via Celebitchy:

Is Katy Perry about to make the same mistake twice? Sources tell Star the fast-moving pop star, 27, is already house hunting in London with her new beau, guitarist Robert Ackroyd, just three months after meeting him. “Rob has been staying with Katy in L.A., but now he needs to be in England because he’s playing in all the summer festivals. He begged her to go with him,” says the source. “At first Katy wasn’t sure because he’s got such a ladies’ man reputation [sound familiar?] and only recently split from his ex.” But he insisted he’d put his bad-boy ways behind him to be with her.

Rob, 29, even went so far as to take out his iPhone and delete the numbers of every single ex-girlfriend in front of Katy. “He told her he just really wanted to be with her all the time and that it would be all fun and no drama,” says the source. “She was so taken with the gesture that she agreed to do it.”

There’s just one bump in the road to their happiness — her ex, Russell Brand. “Russell lives in the U.K., and both Katy and he have agreed that they can’t live in the same town anymore,” says the insider.

The amazing thing is, Russell, 37, who Katy says was “unbearably petty” during their 14-month marriage, has actually agreed to give up his home turf in the U.K. and move to L.A. for the summer. Katy is surprised and delighted that he’s being so accommodating.

“She has definitely moved on from Russell,” the sources says. “She’s telling friends she’s madly in love with Rob and has never felt this way about anyone before,” the sources says. “Katy really feels inspired by England, and she just can’t wait to put this horrible year behind her and go forward with this amazing guy by her side.”

I don’t even know where to begin with this. History repeats itself, I guess, and in this case, the history is that a couple of years ago, Katy met a different man who had a similar reputation for being promiscuous. They dated for three months, then they got engaged. The wedding was several months later, and the divorce was filed several months after that. So obviously, in the meantime while she’s waiting for the divorce to finalize, a great idea would be to do the exact same thing all over again.

And if I was concerned about moving in with my boyfriend because I was worried he was a player, then he probably just wouldn’t be my boyfriend anymore. Deleting ex-girlfriends’ numbers from your phone doesn’t exactly sound like an amazing promise of commitment to me. And call me cautious, but if a guy tried to convince me to move in with him because it would be “all fun and no drama,” then again, that would be a no for me.

But hey, I guess if you’re Katy Perry, then getting a house with someone isn’t such a huge deal. It wouldn’t be exactly the same as, say, a lovable gossip blogger buying a house* with her fiancé. There’s a lot more money involved, and a whole lot more travel. I guess for Katy Perry, buying a house in England isn’t really a big deal at all. At least I hope it isn’t, because I really don’t want to write all the engagement, wedding, and divorce stories all over again.

* IT’S ME, YOU GUYS. I’m buying a house! Expect questions about buying carpet and putting down kitchen tiles and gardening within the next few weeks.

Katy Perry Is Doing A Whole Lot of Talking About Russell Brand

A photo of Katy Perry

She also has crazy/scary/dead/drugged out eyes. But let’s just focus on that first thing for right now, all right?

Katy Perry is working on promoting her tour documentary, which, by the way, I’m definitely going to see. She’s doing a lot of interviews, and she seems to be focusing a lot on the footage that shows her dealing with the breakup of her marriage with Russell Brand. Remember that interview that she did earlier this week where she discusses how she had to bend over to cry so she wouldn’t mess up her fake eyelashes? Yeah, she’s been saying a lot of things like that. Poor Katy, I guess.

Here are a few things that Katy had to say on her appearance on The Tonight Show last night:

“Just because you’re in the spotlight doesn’t mean you get to dodge the curveballs — they’re actually bigger,” the Wide Awake singer told Leno. “I think if you were to see the movie and it was completely avoided, you’d think, ‘Hmm that’s strange, I know something else happened in her life last year.’”

Katy said she wanted to handle the split “delicately with the most integrity I could,  and show, ‘Yeah I’m going through the same situation that half of America goes through and somehow I landed on my feet.’ So you don’t have to lay down and die like you think.”

The Firework singer added that “it wasn’t always exciting to watch those unflattering scenes where I’m crying and having an intense moment, but I think people will relate to me more seeing me at my lowest point and now at my highest point.”

And just in case you want to hear one more thing about Katy Perry crying, People has another story about the Part of Me documentary:

In her new movie Part of Me, Perry, 27, pulls back the curtain to discuss why her marriage with Brand, 37, fell apart.

The biggest strain on their relationship, she reveals, was her busy touring schedule. As scenes in the movie show, Perry used days off from her grueling world tour to take side trips to see Brand. Yet the time apart still took its toll.

In one scene, Perry is seen sobbing uncontrollably backstage – minutes before show time. Eventually, she rallies. “Start time,” she says before hitting the stage.

Perry also hints that her rocketing music career was a source of tension between her and Brand.

“I thought to myself, ‘When I find that person that’s going to be my life partner, I won’t ever have to choose [between the partner and my career] … they won’t be threatened or have weird motives,” Perry says. “Then I started to realize, that’s not true. That fairytale I had is not true for me right now.”

The pop star says she did everything she could to save her marriage. “I have that same belief system with everything, from career to my life to my personal life, everything. And I will do everything it takes to not fail. And I did everything it took but it still failed.”

What “weird motives” is Katy saying that Russell Brand had? And yeah, I’m sure she did “everything it took” to make her marriage work, except, you know, spending time with her husband.

Have I mentioned how excited I am to see this movie?

Katy Perry Has No Regrets

A photo of Katy Perry

Uh, no offense to Katy, but if she thinks that she doesn’t have any regrets, then she might want to rethink things. I can think of five things off the top of my head that I would regret if I were Katy Perry, and that only includes things like burgundy lipstick and stupid dresses. If we were to get into the serious stuff, then I don’t even know how many regrettable things we would find.

But it doesn’t matter, because I’m not Katy Perry. Katy Perry is Katy Perry, and in this interview, boy, is she ever:

On tears and fake eyelashes: “There were times when what was going on in my personal life was so overwhelming that I had to bend over to let those tears fall straight out of my eyes and not my false lashes just as I’m about to go up on that ramp and sing ‘Teenage Dream.’”

On religion: “I’m no poster child for Christianity.”

On honesty: “Like how I write my songs, honesty has always worked for me,” she says. “So if it ain’t broke, why f-cking fix it?”

On her divorce: “I still believe in love and marriage. I’ve just learned lessons along the way. I regret nothing.”

She identifies with Kim Kardashian: Perry adds that, like Kim Kardashian’s ill-fated 72-day marriage to NBA up-and-comer Kris Humphries, “Nobody knows what really happened except the two people who are in it.”

She also said that she’s going to start her own record label, which sounds just wonderful.  Since we don’t hear nearly enough Katy Perry songs on the radio, it’s really exciting to know that we could also start hearing songs discovered and approved of by Katy Perry on the radio.  Can’t wait!

Also, how long until Kim Kardashian starts trying to make best friends with Katy? Will it air on this season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, do you think?