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Justin Bieber

6Justin Bieber’s Raising Hell In Paris Now, Too, I Guess

justin bieber

This little asshole just won’t go away. After nearly causing Britain’s collective heads to explode with his sheer idiocy, Justin Bieber has since moved his Tour of Terror on to mainland Europe. First stop, Paris, where Baby Bieber and Co were apparently asked to leave the Meurice Hotel for having shitty attitudes and inciting riots from his remaining fans.

From Metro:

Justin Bieber has just been kicked out of the Meurice Hotel in Paris,’ Paris based TV and radio presenter Jean-Marc Morandini revealed in his blog on Monday.

‘It was a decision taken by the management of the luxury hotel because of his attitude in the establishment, and because of the nuisance caused by the presence of his fans around the buildings.’

The 19-year-old was slapped with the ban after he and a ‘vast’ entourage booked up a six figure stay at seven suites based over two floors at the ‘Hotel of Kings’, which boasts British royals, US president Franklin D.Roosevelt and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie as former guests.

But within a few hours hundreds of young fans had begun massing outside and even inside the lobby.

A source at the establishment revealed the noise had become ‘intolerable’.

‘There were kids everywhere screaming and shouting, and the other guests just didn’t like it,’ said the insider.

‘Justin was clearly encouraging his fans – that’s something he has to do.’

I can’t believe anyone still cares about Justin Bieber, but then, teenage girls (ones who like Justin Bieber in the first place, that is) are pretty stupid. Apparently the hotel spokesperson followed up the reports by saying that Bieber and his team definitely left super suddenly but they wouldn’t throw him out because that’s not really their policy. Read: “We totally threw him out but we don’t want to deal with the Beliebers. We saw what happened with Olivia Wilde.”

March 19, 2013 at 9:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

5Justin Bieber And Lindsay Lohan Are Totally Not Friends

lindsay lohan justin bieber

Justin Bieber – of all people – made fun of Lindsay Lohan on Instagram. Apparently this was one stop he had to make on his Justin Bieber Destroys Himself Tour. In a caption on his account, he wrote, “… to those comparing me to Lindsay Lohan look at her 2012 tax statements ;)”

justin bieber instagram(In case you can’t read this, it’s Beebsey going on and on about how awesome he is and “I don’t care if you believe in me” and ending with “I think I’m going pretty damn good. And to those comparing me to Lindsay Lohan look at her 2012 tax statements ;)”

I think we can all agree that the winky face is the most offensive thing here. Apparently, he quickly deleted it but that did nothing.

TMZ reports that Lindsayyyyy was not pleased.

Lindsay is telling friends … it’s too little, too late … and “karma” will bite him in the ass.

We’re told Lindsay feels Bieber’s comments were “senseless and mean” — she’s never had beef with him … and has no idea why he chose to single her out, bullying her on an international platform.

THE AGONY.

The Beebs offered a super speedy Beeby apology. Via TMZ:

My post was only up for a few minutes but I realized right away that what I said at the end was wrong and distracted from what I was trying to say. I immediately deleted it and rewrote it so it would show what I was really feeling and those words are up now.

By “rewrote it” what me means is that he took out all Lohan references.

Justin: don’t apologize. Lindsay: do your taxes. Now everybody go home and get some sleep.

March 15, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

5Justin Bieber Blames the Gym and Meanies For His UK Breakdown

justin bieber amsterdam

I think we’re reaching the conclusion of Justin Bieber‘s epic UK breakdown. Let’s do a checklist here, just to recap:

- Cries about the “worst birthday ever” after trying to sneak underage kids into a club and not getting his own way

- Turns up three hours late for his own concert

- Wears ugly outfits on a “dare” then can’t seem to keep his shirt on

- Goes on insane Twitter rant about how rough he has it but won’t listen to the haters

- “Collapses” on stage and goes to the hospital for oxygen and an Instagram selfie session

- Fights with photographer and threatens to “f-cking beat the f-ck out of him”

- Cancels Portuguese concert over “technical equipment loading issues”, aka low ticket sales

- Gets advice from will.i.am

- Takes trip to Amsterdam to get blazed out of his mind and forget about the disastrous last few weeks

That about finishes the cycle, doesn’t it? Now, Justin has already promised (threatened?) UK fans that he’ll return to the country in the future, but he’s also not willing to let things go without setting the record straight. He’s NOT a total asshole, guys, okay? It’s just that he was really tired from working out so hard and because the paparazzi are real meanies!

From Germany’s Bild magazine:

“It was a hard week. I was working out every morning and had a huge show every night,” he told Germany’s Bild.

“When people are pushing their camera in your face all day long and yell mean things at you [it's hard].

“I’m only human, too. I’m far away from home, I miss my family, my siblings and my friends.”

I suppose it is tough when your mother is too busy using your name to sell herself to any area of the entertainment industry that’ll take her to put you over her knee and spank your obnoxious ass back to normalcy. Also, how in the hell does going to the gym – unless you’re taking steroids, I guess? – make you act like a total prick?

Alright, at the end of this entry, we’re now a Bieber-free zone for at least… well, until he gets arrested or deported or something equally as hilarious.

March 13, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

1Justin Bieber Is Getting Advice From will.i.am Now, I Guess

justin bieber pics

Justin Bieber isn’t having a very good 2013 so far. He’s showed up hours late for his own concerts, been kicked out of two clubs, got in a fight with a photographer and canceled another show over what seems to be low ticket sales. His transformation into complete and utter waste of space seems nearly complete!  But if you’re going to have your head so far up your own asshole you can’t see the light of day, you’ll want to consult someone who’s been there, done that, right? Enter will.i.am!

From Channel 5 News (via DigitalSpy):

will.i.am has now referred to Bieber’s troubles and questionable behavior as a mere “bump in the road”, insisting that he is still “a good kid”.

“I already gave [advice] to him on the phone, he’s good, he’s a good kid,” the Voice UK coach told Channel 5 News. “When you’re 17, 18, 19, 20 the world can get you off course but he’s gonna be alright.

“He has a good family, good people around him. Just every once in a while there’s a bump in the road.”

The “bump” in this case is more like a giant crater that’s going to swallow the earth and all its inhabitants into a black hole of his ass hattery, but okay, WILLIAM. Second of all, the world doesn’t get you off course, but way too much money, a mother who just wants you as a cash cow and otherwise probably would have still been thinking about the abortion she was going to have, “friends” who want to reap the benefits of your work, employees who are enablers because they don’t want to lose their jobs and record labels who want to make as much off you as they can before the world forgets about your stupid, skinny ass will definitely get you off course.

Also, shut up, will.i.am. You don’t even go here!

March 12, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber, will.i.am

14Justin Bieber Cancels Concert, Remains An Asshole

justin bieber photographer fight

Justin Bieber cancelled one of his upcoming Portugal concert, according to E Online. Whose f-cking ass is he going to kick over this one?

“Due to unforeseen circumstances, Justin Bieber was forced to cancel the second operation, in Portugal, on 12 March,” the Portuguese promoter Everything is New posted on their Website. “The Canadian singer is eager to play for the Portuguese fans on 11 March.”

The message also promised a refund to fans who had purchased tickets for the concert. “Holders of tickets valid for March 12 should contact the respective place of purchase to receive a refund within 30 days of the date of the scheduled concert, which ends April 11.”

The Beebs has been having a bit of a rough time lately. What, with his inability to find a shirt that says on his body and showing up late to his own concert and having the worst birthday ever. Best of luck to you, Mr. Bieber. Or whatever. I don’t really care.

March 11, 2013 at 5:30 am by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

12Justin Bieber’s Playing The “Pity Me” Card Now

justin bieber hospital pics

Another day, another Justin Bieber story (I know, I’m sorry). He’s still in the UK, he’s still an asshole, but this time, we’re supposed to feel bad for him because poor baby Justin felt like he “couldn’t breathe” while backstage at the O2 arena and had to see the medics. After performing a shortened set, he went to the hospital, had some oxygen and felt so ill, he managed to find time to Instagram the experience. Why him, God? How could you torture such a pure, innocent soul?!

From TMZ:

A source close to Justin tells us the singer felt woozy during the show at the O2 Arena … and with 4 songs to go, he stumbled backstage where he collapsed.

We’re told the singer was pulled into a private room where he was treated with oxygen from emergency personnel.

Sources say Bieber was advised to go to the hospital … but declined … insisting that he “had to finish the show for his fans.”

That’s when Bieber’s rep, Scooter Braun, went on stage and told the crowd … “Justin’s got very light breath. The whole show he’s been complaining, He’s backstage with the EMTs and the doctor.

I hate to say this whole thing is totally bullshit, but… it’s totally bullshit. He gets a bunch of bad press and is called out for the little prick that he is, goes on a weird Twitter rant and then suddenly falls ill and we’re meant to feel bad for him? No thanks. I don’t wish ill on anyone – not even Justin Bieber – but that doesn’t apply here since the whole thing is fake as f-ck. There’s nothing wrong with this kid. Health-wise, anyway.

UPDATE: Bieber just got into a massive fight with a photographer this afternoon and “lunged” at him, saying, “What the f-ck you say? What d’you say? I’ll f-cking beat the f-ck out of you man!” What a class act.

March 8, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber