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Justin Bieber

19Justin Bieber Hopes Anne Frank Would Have Been a Belieber

justin bieber anne frank

Justin Bieber does a lot of stupid shit, but he’s finally done something to take idiocy to the next level. While in The Netherlands this past week, he decided to visit the Anne Frank House on Friday with his friends and guards. Because, you know, a Holocaust victim’s memorial is totally the place for a social call. Can you see where this is going? Probably not.

After staying at the museum for a while, Justin decided the best way to commemorate the day was to sign the guestbook, leaving behind a few pearls of wisdom which the Anne Frank House was so moved by (moved to vomiting or punching, probably), they shared it on their Facebook page yesterday.

Yesterday night Justin Bieber visited the Anne Frank House, together with his friends and guards. Fans were waiting outside to see a glimpse of him. He stayed more than an hour in the museum. In our guestbook he wrote: “Truly inspiring to be able to come here. Anne was a great girl. Hopefully she would have been a belieber.”

I’m just going to let that one sit and soak in for a bit. If you haven’t walked away from your computer to schedule a transorbital lobotomy already, let’s just talk about this for a second. Or better yet, let’s not because it’s disgusting, arrogant, narcissistic and further proof of what an absolute dickhead this kid has turned into. Yes, because Anne Frank’s biggest concern in life would have been your shitty music, kid. Fuck off. And yes, that warrants a lack of censoring.

April 14, 2013 at 8:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

6Aww, Wittle Justin Bieber Is Upset That Selena Gomez Is Hanging Out With His Friends

justin bieber selena gomez

Justin Bieber sucks and even Selena Gomez realised it eventually and kicked him to the curb. I guess his friends are a bit more fun than Justin is, because she’s still hanging out with them and he’s crying about it.

From Radar Online:

A prominent member of the ‘Baby’ singer’s entourage, King Kevi, was spotted leaving Selena Gomez‘s Los Angeles area house last Thursday night, and while a source exclusively told Radar that the relationship is purely platonic, it has still caused tension among the tight-knit pals.

“Kevi and Selena are friends. There was a party that night with 15 or 20 people – just a little kick back – and they were hanging out smoking hookah with some buddies,” the insider told Radar.

The aspiring rapper, who has been living at Bieber’s Calabasas, Calif. estate for the past few months, didn’t tell Justin he was heading over to hang with his ex, and got an angry phone call when photos of him there hit the Internet.

“Justin was p*ssed,” revealed the source. “He said, ‘Yo, why were you kicking it with her? I thought you and I were homies.’ He doesn’t think they’re hooking up but doesn’t want his closest friends partying with her.

“Kevi told him there was nothing going on and they’ve gotten over it, but Justin is always suspicious something sexual is going to happen.”

Right, so Justin really does speak like a total f-cking idiot in his everyday life. “Kicking it”? “Homies”? I won’t even go any further with that. I’ll just leave it there for you to digest.

In any case, apparently Kevi thinks Selena is a hot piece of ass but won’t try anything, even though it’s clear she and Justin are never, ever, ever getting back together, as they say.

“They talk sometimes but not that much – once every two or three weeks,” explained the insider. “I don’t think they’d ever get back together, even though she’s not dating anyone else right now.”

Even though he’s got no intention of a romantic reunion, the All Around The World singer would be furious if his friend started dating the Spring Breakers star.

“Kevi thinks she is smoking hot but he is like Justin’s brother so has to keep it low key,” the source said.

So even Justin’s friends prefer to “kick it” with his ex-girlfriend instead of him and he’s crying about it. Well, here’s a hint – try not being such a raging asshole and maybe that won’t happen, “homie”.

April 13, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

14Nearly Half Of Justin Bieber’s Twitter Followers Are Fake

justin bieber

Social networking is a great tool to expand your brand and keep in touch with your fans when you’re a big time celeb (or want to be one), so it’s no surprise that mostly everyone in showbiz under the age of 30 is all over Twitter, sharing tidbits about their everyday lives, getting into feuds with fellow artists and/or hateful fans and quite often making us cringe.

When Justin Bieber was named the most followed person on Twitter last year, some people wondered how that could be. Well, I’ll tell you how: nearly half of his followers are from fake accounts. Ta da! Fake accounts are deemed such when they are following fewer than 50 people, have 1 or fewer followers and who have never tweeted. Justin’s fake count clocks in at an impressive 45% – impressively sad, that is.

Check out this infographic (I love infographics!):

justin bieber twitter

Oh, snap! Even Katy Perry and Lady GaGa are doing better than the Biebs. No surprise, of course – you’d have to be a robot (or 12) to think Justin has anything worthwhile to say. He’s the worst. So, what do you say? Do you follow Justin? Which stars DO you follow? Do any of them actually have anything interesting to say?

April 10, 2013 at 12:50 pm by Jennifer

6The Daily Bieber: 5 Norwegians Schools Reschedule Exams around Justin’s Concert

justin bieber

In what could be one of the dumbest happenings ever, five Norwegian schools have rescheduled their upcoming exams so that students can attend a Justin Bieber concert. Yes, really. Baby Elvis is due to perform in Oslo on April 16 & 17, but educators are worried that teen girls – who are notoriously nutso for this kid in Norway – will skip out on midterms to go see the show. Instead of expecting parents to get their kids to school and expecting the kids themselves to turn up or fail out, the affected schools have decided to postpone the tests.

From Time:

To accommodate this Bieber-mania, five schools in the Alesund region — located some 230 miles (375 kilometers) northwest of Oslo — have rescheduled exams.

Kristin Halvorsen, Norway’s education minister, said she did not intend to intervene with the schools’ decisions.

“I am concerned that students should be concentrating when they take tests and midterms,” Halvorsen wrote The Associated Press in an email. “The local schools have the responsibility to schedule the local midterms, and if they think there is any reason to change the dates, they have authority to do so.”

As the minister explained, “We’ve all been 14-years-old and know that interests can be intense.”

I’m torn on this. Yes, teenagers are idiots and probably would skip school to go to a Justin Bieber concert, but why not let them face real world consequences and fail out, if that’s what they choose to do? Make the repercussions clear and if they choose to ignore them, too bad, so sad. Sorry, but your boss is not going to shut down the office in 10 years when you’re desperate to see the One Direction reunion tour, so get used to being a responsible human being now.

In other, more LOL-worthy news, Justin himself has been boo-hooing to Teen Vogue about how he has no friends. Huh, wonder why – who wouldn’t want to hang out with a total asshole? Oh, that’s right. Everyone.

“Literally, my phone never rings. I only have, like, four people that I keep in contact with. I just don’t trust anybody. But I don’t need a bunch of friends to make me happy.”

My phone never rings either, but that’s because my friends are smart enough to know I won’t answer and to text my ass instead. I don’t think that’s what Justin was going for, but I don’t care because he sucks.

April 4, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

5Blind Leading the Blind: Chris Brown Thinks Justin Bieber Is Like “Baby Elvis”, Is Praying For Him

justin bieber chris brown

LOLOLOL. Let’s all just digest this for a moment. Human shit stain Chris Brown – himself violent, homophobic and just generally a total smacked ass – is “praying” for Justin Bieber after hearing about the younger singer’s recent trouble/meltdown/whatever the hell it is he’s going through.

From Power 105.1 FM’s Breakfast Club:

“It’s a case of how I feel. Being young, having a limitless amount of income to do whatever you want. You have nobody who’s going to say, ‘Hey bro, you look whack right now.’

I feel like the mainstream media… they’re going to target the little black boys around him and say this is why he’s doing it. I’m damn sure glad I’m not around! I pray for him, I pray for myself. I think we’re both great artists… he’s like a baby Elvis.”

Okay, WHAT? There are so many things I have questions on here.

1. Why the hell wouldn’t someone tell you that you look “whack” for acting like a total dipshit? Maybe not the people who you employ, since they’d probably be afraid of, you know, not having an income, but how about your friends or family or something? Christ, that’s dim.

2. I’m glad at least that Chris could admit that he prays for himself, as well, but how is he not an atheist yet considering those prayers have clearly gone unanswered and they’re both still complete assholes?

3. BABY ELVIS???? Cover your ears, Mr. Presley, or you’ll be rolling in your grave. The day Justin Bieber is anything like Elvis Presley is the day I fling myself off the nearest bridge.

Just shut up. Everyone shut up! Justin probably wouldn’t think the Elvis comparison is too off the mark, though, considering he recently compared himself to Jay-Z in an interview with Teen Vogue:

“I don’t need to address every speculation. Remember when Cam’ron dissed Jay-Z? Jay-Z didn’t even respond. Why didn’t he respond? Because he’s Jay-Z.”

LOL F-ck off, kid.

April 3, 2013 at 11:30 am by Jennifer

1The Daily Bieber: Justin Banned From Austrian Club, Pattie Mallette to the Rescue?

justin bieber

I know we’re all tired of Justin Bieber (and I’m particularly tired of typing the word “asshole” over and over again), but he can’t seem to stay out of the news for longer than 24 hours and refuses to tone down his… assholery (?) so that we can stop writing about him. After smuggling a monkey – and no, that’s not a euphemism – to Germany and refusing to pay for a tattoo, the latest news comes all the way from Austria, where this punk ass has been banned from a nightclub for having his entourage/security team bust up the camera phones of fans enjoying themselves/taking a few snaps.

From The Austrian Times:

Baby Pop singer Justin Bieber has been banned from Vienna’s trendiest nightclub.

He went to the Passage club in Vienna, Austria – built on the site of a converted underground station – where he was surrounded by bodyguards.

According to the management at the club the bodyguards then smashed cameras of fans in the club, destroyed mobile telephones and even groped some of the young girl fans who reportedly left in tears after the Saturday morning assaults.

Club manager Joachim Bankel confirmed: “Justin Bieber is no longer welcome here.”

UGH, this fucking kid. Can he not just be banned from, like, planet earth as a whole?

In other news, will.i.am still thinks anyone gives a shit what he has to say about, well, anything, and is still sounding off on Bieber. His most recent pearl of wisdom saw him claiming that Justin’s money sponge mother, Pattie Mallette, will get him back on track. You know, despite being done with parenting him and all.

From The Daily Telegraph:

“Justin’s going to be okay. It’s dangerous to be a child star, but it’s dangerous to be a child in the ghetto, or to be a child at school being bullied.

“If you have good parents, you’ll be all right. Justin’s mom is great.”

When we eject Justin into space, let’s send will.i.am with him, shall we?

April 2, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer