Got a Tip? Help us Beet Off!

Jon Gosselin

7Jon Gosselin Dropped By Yet Another High School Student

Jon Gosselin and Morgan Christie’s romance is over.  Can you hear my heart breaking from all the way over here?

After “months of fighting”, Christie reportedly kicked the deadbeat dad and defunct reality star to the curb — and out of her house — and the main reasons were because he was fat, lazy and mooch-y.  I knew the girl was a little dense for dating Gosselin to begin with, but come on … is that not why all of his previous relationships — including his marriage — foundered?

Jon and his more-famous ex, Kate split this past June and this is the third fleeting relationship with a twelve year-old that Jon’s been kicked out of.

Christie reportedly asked Jon to leave her home this past Sunday and he’s been on his own since.

No word on if he’s aware that Dakota Fanning is available.

March 26, 2010 at 7:56 am by Sarah
Filed Under: Jon Gosselin

22Jon Gosselin’s Two-Faced! Surprise!

I told you guys earlier this week that Kate Gosselin is set to join the Dancing With the Stars cast and now we finally have some answers to the question, “What’s Jon think about that?” If you believe Jon’s Twitter, he’s happy for his ex and wishes her well, but friends close to Jon say that this is just another thing that Kate’s doing that pisses him off.

Jon’s issue with Kate doing the show is shockingly not fame-related. He’s pissed because this new gig will take Kate away from their kids for days at a time and he’s not getting to spend any of that time with them. Instead, Kate will leave the kids with nannies while she competes on the televised dancing competition. I am never one to side with Jon Gosselin, but for real, Kate? You’re leaving your eight kids with nannies over their father so that you can dance with actual famous people and feed your ego? That’s rude.

It’s not that Jon Gosselin is a good father. I don’t believe that he actually even loves those kids. It’s the principle. If Kate is doing this show for money, then she should save her pennies on the baby-sitter front and let her kids spend time with their father. He’s not going to kill them and I’m sure that they’d be glad to have their father around over some random nanny, right? I’m trying to like you more, Kate. I’m trying. Help me out.

And you, Jon. You need to drop the two-faced crap and just come correct. Tell the world your pissed. Who cares at this point?

March 5, 2010 at 3:05 pm by Molls

9The Gosselin Kids Have Some Remaining Enjoyment

The Gosselin kids were snapped playing in the snow today and it seems like they had a good time considering it was dad’s weekend. While the kids frolicked in the snow and pretended for a short while that there wasn’t a man with a camera standing on the other side of their lawn snapping their every move, Jon Gosselin looked after them and rode around on some sort of all-terrain vehicle. It’s good to see that they don’t cry all day.

February 27, 2010 at 10:55 am by Molls
Filed Under: Jon Gosselin

21Oh, You Will Absolutely Die Of Shock When I Tell You Who Everyone Says Has a Small Dick

Could it be true? Could it even be possible that the hunky chunk of man that I lust after all day could possibly have a small package? Sure, sure. Everyone who’s ever slept with him has made claims recently that he’s working with some lackluster man meat, but the pure sexuality that he radiates tells my heart otherwise.

First it was just his ex Hailey Glassman who described his junk to Stepping Out Magazine as “tiny, tiny, tiny.” She said they would often discuss his tiny manhood explaining, “He said, ‘You know how subconscious [sic] I am of down there. I would tell him to his face, ‘I don’t think you would cheat on me because you’re so small.’”

I can’t imagine why a handsome man like Jon would deal with these abusive women, but apparently this is something he’s used to. Another source has spoken to Stepping Out and they said that his original abuser, ex-wife Kate, was much harsher on him and referred to his penis as “Stubby.” Like, that was the nickname she gave it.

These reports sound pretty convincing, but I’m going to have to keep my faith in Jon intact. I mean, how else do you explain all that hot young tail he’s able to reel in?

February 15, 2010 at 9:01 am by Molls

15Jon Gosselin is Having Sex With a 25-Year Old in Hawaii

Even though Jon Gosselin brought ex-girlfriend Hailey Glassman to Hawaii not that long ago, he’s already back with new girlf, Morgan Christie. What can I say? I guess Hawaii is Jon’s pussy zone. I think Jon feels most comfortable putting the moves on someone he clearly doesn’t deserve to be having sex with after slamming down a couple Mai Tais to the sounds of a ukulele band. Jon has never embodied what I imagine a former IT exec to look like anymore than he has in these photos. Fat, sunburnt, divorced, scamming on some chick almost a decade younger than him. Woof.

February 11, 2010 at 12:15 pm by Molls

10Jon Gosselin Willing To Renegotiate His Children’s Emotional Health

Remember when Jon Gosselin said that his kids could no longer film their TLC reality show because he decided that it was bad for them? OK, well, he takes that back. It’s now being reported that Jon and Kate are in talks to bring the kids back in front of the cameras for Kate’s reality show, with Jon getting a cut for his kids’ labor.

From Fox News:

“Kate is taking advantage of every opportunity,” a source close to Gosselin tells Fox411. “She is working her butt off, making payments on the house and finding new jobs and new projects that will pay her enough to secure the life she wants to provide the children. She is in demand and she wants to sustain the demand without overdoing it.”

Meanwhile, Jon is struggling to slide out of the mess he created for himself when he forced filming of “Jon & Kate Plus Eight” to stop last year. Sources say he is in talks with TLC to reach an agreement to allow them to film the family again.

“Jon does not have money for the intense lawyer fees and ensuing battle with the media giant and Kate has asked him to reconsider his decision for the family,” the source said. “She is willing to negotiate with him and TLC so that everyone gets what they want.”

But while the former couple is working toward a professional relationship, don’t expect them to become the best of friends any time soon.

Don’t worry, Fox News. I didn’t expect the two of them to go all BFF on us just ’cause they’ve figured out how to make money off of their kids again.

I should add that I actually really respect what a shithead Jon Gosselin has turned in to. On the show he only had a tiny little bit of visible douchey-ness and after the show it got pretty apparent and now it’s just like “I’m here, I’m queer, gay used to it”, except with being an asshole and a horrible parent instead of being a homosexual. I mean, he’s flying that flag so hard right now. There’s definitely something respectable about that level of commitment.

February 10, 2010 at 9:54 am by Molls