Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Glenn Beck Is A Total Gleek!

When I think about people that you, the reader, would like to hear more about, one name always comes to mind: Glenn Beck.  We don’t talk about him much in these parts, but I get the feeling that you guys are just the kind of guys who love him to bits.  Or the kind of guys who would love to chop him to bits.  Either way, your moment has come, because Glenn Beck just divulged his massive boner for Glee!

Personally, I detest Glenn Beck, and that’s why this video is so hilarious. Here’s a transcript of the part where Glenn gushes:

This show stands out and stands for almost every value that I have … I’ve seen this show twice this year with my wife this year and I’ve watched it in stunned horror combined with a sense of admiring awe. It is a brilliant, brilliant show. Very, very well done. But it is a horror show. All of the characters are extremely good-looking, extremely talented. She’s by the way hysterical [points at Jane Lynch]. Everybody in here is somebody that your kids would want to be like.

Except everybody is sleeping with everybody else, there’s no values, it’s all self-gratification, it’s a nightmare … Brilliant songs and performances brilliantly edited, brilliantly shots … I looked at my wife and I said, “There is no way to beat this.”

Can’t you just tell how much he actually loves the show?  It’s like his producers went “Glenn, seriously, you can’t like this show, it’s way too liberal,” and Glenn was like “I know, I know, but have you seen Chord Overstreet?”

Quotables: Did You Know SNL’s Victoria Jackson is a Bigot?

“Did you see Glee this week? Sickening! And, besides shoving the gay thing down our throats, they made a mockery of Christians — again! I wonder what their agenda is? Hey, producers of Glee — what’s your agenda? One-way tolerance?”

- Former Saturday Night Live cast member and current Christian crusader Victoria Jackson, in her World Net Daily piece about Glee‘s big gay make out episode.

My gay husband and I were talking about this earlier today: Don’t you hate it when you love a celebrity and then find out that they’re some sort of crazy conservative? Not just a regular conservative, but like, the really extreme kind? That happened to us last year with Dixie Carter and we were straight-up devastated.

Hear Lea Michele Singing ‘Firework’ Before ‘Glee’ Airs Tonight!

We’re not exactly Lea Michele fans around these parts (or Glee fans, for that matter), but even I can admit that I really like her cover of Katy Perry’s “Firework” from tonight’s episode. In fact, I’m kind of interested in watching the show now to see if I’ve had a change of heart.

I doubt that this version of “Firework” will ever be as popular as the show’s cover of Katy’s “Teenage Dream” earlier this season, but as long as they’re taking Katy Perry songs and making them more listenable, I’m not going to complain.

Let me know what you think of the cover by voting in the poll and chiming in in the comments.

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Let’s Talk About How Worthless Lea Michele Is

A photo of Lea Michele

Ok, “worthless” might be a little strong, but so is this deep sense of betrayal I have.  Because listen, I used to love Glee. I’d have little viewing parties throughout the first season, I got all the albums, I loved that cheesy musical nonsense.  But you guys, Lea Michele ruined everything with her awful attitude and her racy, attention whore photo shoots and her annoying acting. She ruined it, and I’m not going to forgive her anytime soon.

Anyway, all these feelings came right back up when I saw this little interview Lea did:

On Broadway’s upcoming revival of Funny Girl and how she hasn’t been approached to do it: “No — where are the calls? Where are these calls? I mean if you don’t know my obsession with Funny Girl … of course, Fanny Brice is me.  I feel very connected to that story.”

On being beautiful: “Working on Glee, playing Rachel Berry has made me feel more beautiful than I have ever felt in my whole life. I go on that red carpet because I now know that true beauty comes from inside. So as long as I’m happy, I put these clothes on. If they like them, they like them. If they don’t, what you going to do?”

On looking like a high schooler: “[I'm] looking younger. Don’t you guys think? I’m just looking younger as the days go by. For me, I’m fortunate that I feel like I look young. As long as the viewers are believing it, then I’ll take it.”

Lea might as well be saying “Yeah, I really enjoy slapping kittens on their little faces and then using their tails and their little baby paws to stir up the meth I cook in my bathtub,” because that’s what it feels like to me.  Maybe it’s her phrasing, maybe it’s because it’s early and I spent yesterday talking to useless robots at Dell and mourning Natalie Portman, but I am all kinds of over it.  What about you guys?

Glee Does Funny or Die

Today, I woke up and my internet connection was slower than Lance Armstrong’s package in a two-testicled race because I live out in the beachside boonies where the best internet service providers go by the wicked generic name of ‘Mediacom.’ And because we got two inches of ice last night, coupled with the fact that MEDIACOM BLOWS GOATS (DO YOU HEAR THAT, MEDIACOM?), sitting here with my laptop waiting to establish a connection faster than 1MBps is like watching paint dry, just .. duller.

As for the video, I’m the first to say that I absolutely detest the show Glee, but I’m willing to admit that this total cornball move of a video totally made my morning – but only because it’s the first thing that’s run on my connection today that hasn’t incurred a debilitating interruption.

Leave your comedic quips in the comments, guys.

‘Glee’ Stops Production Because of Tonsillitis Scare

Although the hit show was filming it’s super important “post-Superbowl” episode, production came to a halt this week on the Glee set after several folks got sick with tonsillitis. I didn’t even know people got tonsillitis anymore. That sounds so old timey and obsolete to me, like small pox.

Production is set to start again on Monday and the time that they missed will be made up for in early January, but damn… Those kids need to be staying healthy. More vitamin C at craft services and less water bottle sharing, you guys.

Katy Perry and Darren Criss Perform ‘Teenage Dream’

The Trevor Project held a live event in Los Angeles last night and no performance could have been more perfect for this show/this year than Katy Perry and Darren Criss performing Katy’s song “Teenage Dream” together. Of course Darren famously covered the song on Glee earlier this year, so he delivered his portion of the song flawlessly.

Do you hear that sound? That’s the sound of 20,000 homosexuals imploding with joy after hearing this version of their anthem.