5Beyoncé Demands $900 Worth of Titanium Straws and Red Toilet Paper On Tour

Beyoncé is currently treating the world to her dulcet tones on the Mrs. Carter World Tour, and a diva needs to travel in style. We’ve all read the ludicrous demands of the stars, so it should be no surprise that one of the biggest celebrities has some rather interesting requirements for her dressing room, including $900 worth of titanium straws and red toilet paper. Baller!

From The Daily Star:

Beyoncé’s diva demands include £600 drinking straws and hand-carved ice balls to suck on. An insider claims her backstage rider insists that her crew wear only 100% pure cotton clothes, presumably to save her from allergic reactions.

She’s also said to ask for special titanium straws which are used to drink a special alkaline water that’s served at exactly 21 degrees Celsius.

She also demands her dressing room has freshly painted white walls and a new toilet seat, and even makes it clear that she will only use red toilet paper. No junk food is allowed. Instead, snacks must include glass platters of almonds and oatcakes, and there’s a strict green-only policy when it comes to salad bar nibbles.

A source said: “She’s extremely regimented and is taking everything extremely seriously, so she expects her list of demands to be adhered to.

“Working so hard and with the toll the travel takes on her body in addition to the intense shows, she feels that her requests aren’t too much to ask for as she wants to ensure everything goes to plan.”

First of all, I’m down with the new toilet seat. No one’s trying to plant their ass where Bruno Mars’ was the day before, you know? Still, no snacks? I mean, I’d probably have severe diarrhea at the thought of performing in front of 65,000 people or whatever her arenas hold, so I doubt downing a pizza with extra cheese would be a great pre-performance idea. However, I’d like to think after dancing my ass off for two hours, I could have a slice and some peanut butter M&Ms backstage, you know?

Anyway, I love the idea that Beyoncé is allergic to anything but organic cotton. Shit, cotton is a pretty good fabric, though. I’m wearing head to toe cotton myself, right now. I’m in my pyjamas, of course, but whatever!

May 6, 2013 at 11:30 am by Jennifer

4So, Here’s Beyoncé’s cover of Amy Winehouse’s ‘Back To Black’…

I’m generally a Beyoncé fan and and think she can pretty much do anything she’d like and still be a queen. One project I can’t really get behind, though, is her cover of Amy Winehouse‘s ‘Back to Black’ for The Great Gatsby soundtrack. First of all, why? Second of all, WHY? Third of all… you get the picture. It’s so unnecessary. If they couldn’t write an original song for Bey to sing, why didn’t they just secure the rights to ‘Back to Black’ – you know, the actual version? Much as no one should bother covering Beyoncé, even Beyoncé can’t cover Amy Winehouse. It’s awful and unnecessary and I won’t have it.

That being said, Mark Ronson played the track in full on his East Village Radio show last night and while some people thought it was okay, one SoundCloud user in particular pointed out the fact that it’s an “abomination”. I couldn’t have put it better myself.

Take a listen below and then in the comments, rate it on a scale of 1 to 10 of awfulness.

April 27, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer

1Beyoncé Stars In A Commercial For Beyoncé

Beyoncé stars in a new mini music video/commercial for Beyoncé H&M. H&M and Beyoncé teamed up to make this pretentious as hell video to promote their new “Beyoncé As Mrs. Carter In H&M” line.

I normally don’t have a problem with Beyoncé – I don’t even care about her most of the time — but this commercial made my eyes roll so hard I got a headache. She’s frolicking on the beach, mostly in slow motion, singing, eye f-cking the camera. It’s only 1 minute and 30 seconds but I couldn’t get through it. I think I’m just on Beyoncé overload. H&M describes the line as, “an epic fantasy, with glamour, drama and also a sense of humor.” Please, tell me where the sense of humor is, because I really don’t see it, at least not intentionally.

I think I’m just suffering from Beyoncé overload. Can she please just take a break on her private island for a while?

April 25, 2013 at 4:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives

4Beyoncé Thinks Blue Ivy Carter Could Grow Up To Be President

Beyoncé is a modern day feminist, so in her eyes, there’s nothing women can’t do. That includes daughter Blue Ivy Carter, who she believes could grow up to be president if that’s what she wants to do. Her statements come as part of the Chime For Change campaign, a cause that aims to promote education, health and justice for women everywhere and that a lot of celebs have taken part in (see video above).

“I’m telling my daughter everyday, ‘You know you can be president. You know it’s possible.’

“I know she has no idea why I’m saying that, but at 1 years old I’m like, ‘You know you can be president’.”

Well, you can’t say Beyoncé doesn’t aim high. Speaking of the president, though, remember Bey & Jay-Z’s little jaunt to Cuba? Well, the actual president, Barack Obama, said he knew nothing about it and has more important things on his plate.

“I wasn’t familiar that they were taking the trip,” Obama told NBC’s Today. “My understanding is I think they went through a group that organizes these educational trips down to Cuba.”

“This is not something the White House was involved in. We’ve got better things to do.”

Oh, snap!

April 18, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer

1Beyoncé’s New H&M Campain Is Very Full Of Bikinis

Beyoncé is gorgeous and has a great body, so more power to her for getting her bikini on for her new H&M campaign. New photos have emerged which show the singer in pieces from the tropical themed collection and I can’t really hate on homegirl, though none of the swimsuits look particularly great. I guess they’ll come in handy on her private island, though.

H&M must have offered her a shit ton of money to sign this deal, because she certainly doesn’t need any more pocket change and it’s not like they’re Louis Vuitton or something. On the plus side, 25% of the sales from the collection will go to H&M For WaterAid, which helps people in poor countries have access to clean drinking water.

What do you think of the new photos?

April 15, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer

5Jay-Z’s Buying Beyoncé Her Own Island Now

Not content with the space occupied by us mere mortals, Jay-Z has apparently decided to buy Beyoncé a private island on which to holiday with their daughter Blue Ivy. Because, you know, that’s just something that people do. The island, located in the North Abaco district of the Bahamas, is apparently worth over $3 million (which seems like quite a good price for a private island, truth be told), offers complete privacy. You know, until the paps get those super zoom lenses and take pics from a boat in the middle of the ocean.

From The Sun:

A source said: “Jay’s been looking for a private island for the family.

“He wants to turn it into his own Necker Island like Richard Branson.

“He’s getting it partly to mark their fifth wedding anniversary but also, with Bey back in the spotlight, it’s getting impossible for them to do normal things such as go to the beach with Blue.

“A private island means they’ll be able to have quality time with minimum staff and security.”

The island, a short flight from Miami, has patchy phone reception and no satellite TV. Sounds like a nightmare.

Love the random Richard Branson reference – and I can feel this, I guess. I sometimes wish I had my own island to live on so that I could separate myself from the large swath of idiots I encounter on a daily basis (because there’s too many of them and they’d overpopulate a single island), and if you’ve got the money, I guess why not. Still, with them it does come off as a bit showy and excessive and I’m not quite sure why. At least they won’t need government permission for this one.

April 11, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer