Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Ke$ha Eyef-cked A-List Hobo Johnny Depp

kesha johnny depp hobos Ke$ha

Ke$ha has maybe been brushing her teeth with too many bottles of Jack, because she claims that she and Johnny Depp had “eyeball sex.” Eye f-cking Johnny Depp would have been a really sexy thing to happen to a gal (or hell, a guy) ten years ago, but now the idea of having Mr. Depp eyef-ck me would make me feel like I was staring into the eyes of the hobo from David Lynch’s Mulholland Dr.

The NYDailyNews has the whole creepy story:

Glitter rocker Ke$ha may not have spoken with actor Johnny Depp, but she still claims to have had an intimate connection with him when both stars attended a charity show last year.

According to Metro, the rocker and Depp gazed at each other longingly across the room.

“Me and Johnny Depp had eyeball sex at the benefit concert for Superstorm Sandy in Los Angeles,” Ke$ha said.

“We never really talked — we just had eyeball sex,” the 26-year-old “C’mon” singer explained.

Johnny “Worst Willy Wonka Ever” Depp is apparently super serious with actress Amber Heard so if this is true it basically means that he cheated on her and is a life-ruiner and is no better than Tiger Woods.

J/K, OBVIOUSLY.

I’m amazed that she was able to break away from drinking her own pee long enough for this to (allegedly) happen. I will say that they do make a very fine hobo couple.

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