Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Blind Gossip Insists That The Ball-Gaggingly Good Joe Jonas Sex Tape Is Real

joe jonas britney spears

Joe Jonas apparently has a very kinky very un-Jonasy sex tape about to wreak havoc on his career. Mr. Jonas responded to the claims with this lolzworthy tweet:

joe jonas ball gag

To which Blind Gossip says, “Spin, little Jonai, spin!” They say that the tape (using the term “tape” loosely of course, as everything is done digitally nowadays) is very much real and is going to come out on the 3rd of April. Here’s their update:

It’s apparently called a “ball gag”, not a “gag ball”. Sorry that we didn’t know the proper BDSM terminology.

Some of you have asked about the drugs they were doing at the beginning of the tape. It wasn’t cocaine or heroin. It was marijuana. They weren’t using a bong or a pipe. They were smoking what’s called a “blunt”. It looks like a small cigar.

Who the hell reads and writes Blind Gossip, elementary schoolers?

The tape was apparently Mr. Jonas’ eye-rollingly hipster girlfriend’s idea, whose name I’m not going to even mention because I want to deny her of publicity, and not even because I like the Jonas Brothers, because I don’t, I don’t even care about them, but because of reasons Bitch and Please.

April 3, everyone! Put reminders in your Smartphones! It’s like Christmas!

4 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Um…I read Blind Gossip and I’ve been out of elementary school for about a million years so I don’t know what kids are talking about these days, but I sure as HELL hope they don’t know what a ball gag or a blunt are.

  • Thinking about this and really wondering who on Earth would buy this video. I mean, this isn’t in line with his demographic & no one else cares – do they?

  • I read Blind Gossip and a heck of a lot of others do, too. Based upon comments made, a hell of a lot more read BG than read EB. I think there are a lot of folks that like gossip – blind and otherwise – and to insult any segment of that group is cutting off your nose to spite your face. (And there are not a ton of super annoying ads that make reading the entries a pain in the ass on Blind Gossip. Yet despite the pain in the ass, I endure it to read you guys because me and my “elementary school” brain like your posts. So if I’m stupid then I’m stupid for reading this site as well.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.