Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Blind Items: John Mayer’s Already Thinking of Breaking Up With Katy Perry

photo of katy perry and john mayer pictures
From Blind Gossip:

This high-profile female celebrity bought her boyfriend a beautiful new automobile this holiday season. She even told him that there were no strings attached so that he could feel more manly about it.

He is so appreciative of her thoughtful gift that the first thing he did was to thank her with a few special hours in the bedroom.

The second thing he did was to start calling dealerships and researching the car online to get an idea of its value. That way, when they break up with next year, he can sell it for cash.

He has told friends that he already knows the relationship will likely not survive the upcoming scandal of her discovering how much he cheats on her. But will she be surprised when she finds out the gender of those with whom he is cheating?

So now, I don’t know if Katy Perry bought John Mayer a car, but duh, it wouldn’t really be at all surprising if Katy Perry did buy him a car, because Katy Perry would totally do what she needed to do to keep a man. Also not surprising? That John Mayer would be cheating so brashly on Katy Perry and not really trying to hide it. That last thing? The thing about John Mayer cheating on Katy with other dudes? Well. Also not surprising. As a matter of fact, nothing about this whole situation is all that surprising, and the fact that it’s not surprising isn’t surprising either.

15 CommentsLeave a comment

  • jennifer lopez and casper. Mayer has $$$$$$, selling a car for cash, it seems rather moot for him. on the other hand, Casper?

    • Hi, you_are_stupid. If I thought it was J. Lo and Casper, I wouldn’t be saying that *I* think it’s Katy Perry and John Mayer. That’s all.

  • Nah, I’m with Emily on this one. Mayer has too much money to be researching the resale value of his car, and I think it’s *much* more likely that Casper’s gay than that Mayer is.

  • John Mayer has a 20 million dollar watch collection. I doubt he would need to go online to sell a car his girlfriend gave him. Jennifer Aniston bought John a Bentley and he didn’t take it. Since he knew they were dunzo.

    John likes to play head games with girls. He doesn’t rob them financially

    Jennifer Lopez is the easier guess.

  • Lol I LOVE how Emily posted this yesterday but guessed it was a different person. Getting a little repetitive, huh Sarah?

    • Whoever
      Submitted on 2012/12/29 at 9:27 am
      Lol I LOVE how Emily posted this yesterday but guessed it was a different person. Getting a little repetitive, huh Sarah?

      Submitted on 2012/12/24 at 4:43 pm | In reply to Sarah.
      Plus you’re a stupid annoying fucking bitch.

      Submitted on 2012/12/23 at 8:56 pm
      At least correct your mistakes. Sarah you’re singlehandedly making this site go downhill.

      Yes, I’m totally going to take a miserable, total stranger who calls me a “stupid annoying fucking bitch” seriously. Totally.

  • Unlikely guess aside, same story with different approaches on one site – it would be really great as one post.
    Quote -> Author1’s opinion -> Author2’s opinion

    Posting it as 2 different stories makes it look like the second author (Sarah) doesn’t read the blog and doesn’t know what’s already posted. I’m not saying that’s the case here I’m just saying it doesn’t look good.