Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Simpson’s Baby Photos Are Here and She’s Not Talking About Her Rapid 60-Pound Weight Loss, Either

photo of jessica simpson pictures pregancy first baby photo
From People:

… In this week’s issue, Simpson and Johnson give an exclusive interview, plus share the first photos of their little one, who’s inherited her mom’s eyes and her dad’s calm demeanor.

“We stare at her all the time,” says Simpson. “We can’t get enough!”

But becoming new parents hasn’t been without its hardships. Recovering from surgery – Simpson delivered via C-section – isn’t easy, she says, and nursing, which she does throughout the day, has become “a full-on job.”

Still, “It’s the worst if I have to pump and give Eric a bottle to give her,” says Simpson. “I miss holding her and having that closeness.”

Oh man. Can we talk about the C-section thing? The “Simpson delivered via C-section [which] isn’t easy”? Because I know, I did too, as a lot of you regular readers probably know. And you know who else did? Yeah, I know: I’m gonna bring her up again. BEYONCE. Yeah, she recovered from a C-section, too, and in a quarter of the time that it normally takes other women to recover, naturally. Beyonce recently claimed that she lost sixty pounds in the weeks following her pregnancy, and it was all due to diet and exercise, but if you’ve ever had a C-section, you know that exercise just isn’t really a feasible option for quite awhile. Timeline of events? I had a baby in late February. For the first 10 days after the surgery, I could barely sit up and get out of bed without taking it way easy, and even then, I had quite a bit of pain doing so (and I’m no weenie when it comes to pain, guys). About a week after that, the pain had ceased, and after another week, the discomfort and thought of “Oh my God, I’m going to reach for something in a high cupboard and a kidney might come tumbling out,” had been considered at a minimum.

And six weeks after that, though my doctor told me at the six-weeks post-partum mark I’d be officially “cleared” to exercise, is when I decided that my body felt alright enough to go and do side-bending, heart-pumping cardio to the point where I didn’t feel like I’d tear in half if I happened to shimmy my hips during Zumba or Pilates. All at our own paces, right?

But this post isn’t about me, and it’s not about Beyonce—though every damn time I hear anyone talk about a C-section, I naturally think of her and her amazing one-week recovery and running and losing half a person in no time flat—this post is about Jessica Simpson, how adorable her daughter Maxi is, and how wonderful she looks on the cover of People.

Way to go, girl!

10 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Baby, great. C-Section, great. Recovering your body in short time, great. Jess Simpson, show us your huge boobies!

  • Yeah, but on a different magazine cover (US?), she is talking about having lost 30 pounds in 3 weeks.

  • I had a great surgeon for my c section. I was up an hour later and back to normal in a week. I lost all my baby weight in 3 weeks (and I gained A TON). I know I got really lucky and that for some women, it’s really hard, so I’m counting my blessings. Maybe she just got lucky too.

  • Yes, but Jessica Simpson actually WAS pregnant and gave birth to a baby. Beyonce hired hers, remember?

  • Photo Shop Phony Alert!
    Honest to God, for a few seconds I didn’t recognize Porky! So that’s what an infant stuffed with Mac & Cheese, BBQ ‘tater chips and about a ton of white sugar looks like!

  • Yeah so cute, huh? She how she’s got my cheeks? Looks just like me, awwwe. DONT HATE! If this Breaking News is going to hurt your feelings then read no further bcuz, I can’t hold it in any longer. Well, I always like to put it as nicely as possible so I’m confessing that, yes, I was tappin’ that ass. Hey! Quiet, simma down now! Now there’s treatment y’all can find to help you get over this but dont blame me for sending my love army all up in her overaryisms! She told me she was on the pill. I think it was intrapm, uh, entrap, interco, HEY, SHE forced my taddypoles all up in her vagisil! Now that I think about it, I do kinda feel violated! So what about ME? To all of you, Yes, I do accept all your consolation. Your so kind, thank you.