Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Ellen Records The Audio Book of Fifty Shades of Grey

Oh, how I wish this was actually happening. How I wish that Ellen was recording Fifty Shades of Grey in its entirety, working her special brand of magic all over that mess. Sadly, I don’t think it’s going to happen. But we still have this little video to show us what could have been.

Ok, listen: I started reading the first book last night. And it’s amazing. I’m only on the third chapter, but Ana/Bella has gone on about how beautiful Christian/Edward is at least twenty times. When she sees his teeth for the first time, she stops breathing because “no one should be this good-looking.” She bites her lip and messes with her hair all the time, quirks courtesy of Kristen Stewart, and her inner monologue consistently has lines like “double crap” and “holy crap.” She says or thinks some form of “oh crap” twelve times in the first two chapters. I counted.

All I know is that I can’t wait for this movie to happen. Anybody else?

5 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I too started reading the book yesterday. Loving it so far. Was thinking who would play the characters in the movie. Was picturing Brad Pitt from the “Legends of the fall” days…
    Not sure who in today’s world could play the part.

  • I love the book in all its silliness. And i really never got into twilight so that connection wasnt there for me. I did wonder if there would be an audio version.

    • If you love the silliness of this book, then you should try Twilight. It’s the same kind of silly, and it’s fun to make the connections between characters. Yay for silly books!

  • This book is so crappy I don’t even know where to start. I never made it through the first Twighlight book either because Bella and the authors constant fight against the subordinate clause drove me mad. It is just some cheapo mommy porn everybody seems to get off of. Yesterday it was Twighlight, then Hunger Games, now this rubbish… tomorrow it might be something about a mutilated gold fish who has a weird sexual relationship with a can of tuna.

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