But man oh man, that face. That face!
Here’s some photos of Lindsay Lohan trying to be the redhead everyone fell in love with a decade ago, and is she pulling it off? Well. You guys answered yesterday’s poll best by saying that her newly-dyed red hair was a start, and if she really, really tried, she might end up better off because of it. But the face. Oh, I just can’t even. And while the hair is looking better, I want to start taking bets right now as to how long it’ll be before she dyes it black – signaling an impending drug bender disaster – or goes back to platinum blonde; meaning that she wants the public to see her all vulnerable-like and pretty baby-bunny soft (which is always a fail).
I think people think that I’m totally harsh on Lindsay, and maybe I am, but for good reason. She’s been a disappointment to herself time and time again, and that’s got to be rough. And it’s my job to pick her up when she needs it, and to smush her down when she’s wrong, and sometimes? Well, guys, I’m not human, and sometimes I get those instincts reversed. The thing is, though, Zooey Deschanel, a lady we kind of revere around here, was said to have some choice comments of her own about Lindsay and her recent SNL appearance, and the general consensus was … well, it wasn’t bad:
“It’s so hard [being on SNL]. And can I say something? I thought she did a really good job; everyone reads off cue cards. There were some people saying ‘She read off cue cards!’ Everyone — the cast members, the host — everyone reads off cue cards. That’s how it’s done, because they change the script right before, so you have to read off cue cards.”
So there it is. Even though I didn’t say it myself, there’s a bit of positivity in this post, even if you had to read through half of the damned thing to find it.
I suppose I should lay off a little bit. … No, no, you guys were totally right, and I agree that Lindsay’s come a few inches on her way to recovering the right kind of spotlight that she once had. Right? But really, putting red hair dye on it is akin to dumping salt on a wound from a mortar round. Will it keep it from getting infected? Well, maybe. You could try. But will the end result be a nasty, puckered mess that you try to hide from the world? Most definitely, guys. Most. Definitely.