I know, I know; we need to stop riding the Beyonce Baby Train someday, but guys, today is just not the day, OK?
I happened across some photos that were taken just last night, at the New Jersey Nets basketball game, where Jay and B were photographed in attendance looking … well, looking like they don’t have a newborn at home and like Beyonce never even heard of a little something called “Braxton-Hicks.” (Ask her – trick question. Bet she gets it wrong.)
I mean, I’m glad you’re still rocking the blue nail polish and what not, girl, but I’m sorry. No amount of nail polish is going to convince me that you didn’t just formally adopt your sister’s surrogate or whatever it was you did.
But wait! – before we go full-snark here (I know; I laughed mirthlessly at that, too), the Daily Mail has An Explanation as to Why Beyonce’s So Fit Already:
She [Beyonce] was said to have gained 40lbs when pregnant with her daughter Blue Ivy, but appears to have shed any excess weight in record time.
Beyonce reportedly moved her personal trainer, Marco Borges, into her home following the birth and has been rising at 5am for a cardio session while doing high intensity training on the treadmill later in the day followed by a total body circuit including lunges and squats.
So, DUH. Beyonce’s post-baby weight loss is totally and completely legit, and it has absolutely nothing at all to do with stopping anabolic steroids before the facial hair really started to get thick. I mean, come on. How could you even think otherwise?