First there were those hideous commemorative coins, and now there’s this crazy-faced doll. If I were Kate Middleton, I’d be starting a semi-aggressive letter writing campaign right about now. The first paragraph would open with “Isn’t it enough that I’m marrying the the mediocre prince?” You know, because Prince Harry is clearly the hotter prince? Did I get off topic somewhere?
Oh right, poor Kate Middleton and her crazy-faced doll with the cheap, stupid clothes and accessories. This girl’s going to be a princess, she doesn’t have to stand for this outrageous insult to her good looks. And I’m sure some of you are thinking “there are way more important things than looks, the royal family has more serious matters to attend to.” And I fully agree, I truly do, but hey, if you’re going to get a Barbie made in your likeness, wouldn’t you at least take the time to make sure it’s done right?
All I’m saying is that I’ve seen that look that’s in the doll’s eyes before, and it’s usually when my puppy lunges at my face, bites my lip, then jumps to the floor so she can poop. And then she tries to eat her poop. And I don’t want to associate a future princess with the nomming of feces, ok?