Today's Evil Beet Gossip

The Snark Sagas: Cutting Comments From the Congregation

picture of lindsay lohan and samantha ronson in a car photos

AC on Jessica Simpson Rocks Big Hair and No Pants in New York:
“That’s because it tastes like bacon.”

evilbeetdouche on Lil Kim Wants Nicki Minaj Dead:
“Violence in rap, didn’t see that one coming. What’s next mistreatment of women, promoting drug use, you say?”

Sammy on Lil Kim Wants Nicki Minaj Dead:
“Ugh. Lil Kim’s a has been troll. The only thing I ever enjoyed about her was watching Diana Ross slapping her boob around. Oh, and watching to see if she could ever NOT look like a prostitute.”

Chaz on Set Your DVR, Lohan’s Gonna Be on Letterman on Thursday:
“Geez Jack…. Ya cunt much, or just havin a lil ouble-tray with your enis-pay? Wait… I’ve got it, you wanna be the meat in a man sammich. Whatever, quit bein a bag of dicks!”

Muttley Macclad on Paris Hilton is Thirty Now, So That Must Mean Her Vagina is Carbon-Dated to Gosh, Who Knows When:
“To quote the Mentors,
“I don’t want your herpes 2
If I get it I will ki-ill you’.”

pinup on Which Young Star Got a New Tattoo?:
“Chin? I’d recognize this facial hair anywhere. (I’m not mean, it’s a fact, she happens to be really pretty girl with hairy cheeks)”

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