Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Oh Happy Day! Paris and the Douche Call It Quits!

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Oh you guys. It’s been a crappy day. It’s been a crappy week and a crappy couple of months. But, for a brief shining moment in time, my life is happy. Why, you ask? Because Douche Reinhardt finally got his comeuppance — he was unceremoniously dumped by the reigning queen of unceremonious dumping, Paris Hilton.

“In response to the inquiry on whether Paris Hilton has split up with Doug Reinhardt, yes, this is true they are no longer together. They remain friends and ask that you please respect their privacy,” a rep for Hilton says.

Ummmm whatever. Sources say that Douche is DEVASTATED and begging Paris to take him back. No way, Jose! When will you boys learn? Paris is “so in love” for six months, tops. Then she’s over it. It’s no longer hot. Or huge. Or whatever it is she’s calling it these days. YOU ARE NEVER THE EXCEPTION, BOYS!

Seriously though this happened fast. It was just a couple days ago that Doug was answering questions for Paris on the red carpet. I knew she wouldn’t stand for that for long. NEVER attempt to steal Paris Hilton’s spotlight. She will have her revenge!

So long, Douchie. We won’t miss you. Good luck trying to get Amanda Bynes to take you back … or even The Hills.

10 CommentsLeave a comment

  • She wasnt going to let Miley steal her thunder either. lol

    The world is now safe from all evil-at least for today. And more important, they have not bred!

  • when she really finds someone that she cares about nobody will beleive her ass, this chick don’t evne know what love means. over these years i have loved a total of TWO men!! obviously she doesnt know wtf is going on.

  • Everyone’s breaking up right now. THIS IS SO FREAKIN AWESOME!!!!!! It’s like a can feel the world becoming a better place as I type.

  • I wish I could find the article I had read about Paris and her “relationships”. It made the most valid point about her.

    I will try to paraphrase…

    but Paris “thinks” she is a great find. That she requires and deserves the very best in a man. What one would consider a “get”.

    Example… say how when Jennifer Aniston married Pittm he was consider, at that time, the ultimate “get”.

    Wonky Hilton thinks she is worth a top “get”.

    brawahahahahaa!!!!!

    Yes I laughed when I read it too.

    So as she randomly dates these LA douche’s…. while she believes she will marry very well.

    And deserves to marry well. That the herpes… the sex tape… the wh*ring around… does not count against her. Because she is a GET!

    And sadly this latest douche probably is as close as she is ever going to get to a man with family money. For she is a complete joke to the old money set on the east coast. Which she thinks she deserves to marry into….

    And isn’t she about to be 30?!? Man, it is time to hang up the wh*re act and get a clue.

  • Oops, Doug – can’t buy me love. And just when they got their couples posing down – what a loss to the tabloid world!

    I think that he’s just upset that he wasted so much money on presents for a woman who is given tons of stuff from companies who hope that she wears their dress, bag, jewelry or whatever. And if that doesn’t work, Mummy and Daddy will give her whatever she wants.

    So she’s extremely spoiled and doesn’t value things. Doug’s strategy of giving her presents is like throwing gifts down the black hole of Paris’ inner vacuum – they disappear into the void, never to be seen again.

  • Always unoriginal Parasite stole ‘huge’ from Gwen Stefani talking about her marriage and children, break-up of No Doubt.

  • This is terrible news! Now more people will have to put up with the two of them! They belonged together. They were the perfect match. Now we will have to see pictures of them separately, when you used to be able to just see them together and that was it. And you just know that people would have gotten bored of them eventually, and they would gradually disappear from the world.

  • Paris has moved to bigger things

    CHRISTIANO RONALDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    oh, what i wouldn’t do to get it on with that man
    Paris is a lucky girl