Today's Evil Beet Gossip

DWTS Cast revealed and explained

I don’t even watch Dancing with the Stars and yet I look forward to the line up release like it was the Oscar noms. Something about having the answer to “where are they now” is comforting.  And then of course every season is peppered with random athletes trying to break into the reality tv game.

But if you’re like most people, the list often reads like a who’s who, no really, who are you. So lets break this down.

Amber Rose – Ex GF of Kanye, Emoji creator 2016-08-30 10-19-35
Laurie Hernandez  – Olympic gymnast 2016-08-30 10-20-13
Maureen McCormick  – That’s Marcia Brady, bitch. 2016-08-30 10-20-54
Terra Jole – She’s a little person on a reality show called Little Women. ha. cute. 2016-08-30 10-25-43
Marilu Henner – She was on a show called Taxi. Hit it up on Hulu, it’s awesome. 2016-08-30 10-21-28
Vanilla Ice – 90’s joke, now has a house reno show on HGTV of something. 2016-08-30 10-29-19

Calvin Johnson – Obvs a football player, possible DWTS hottie winner 2016-08-30 10-28-25
Jake T. Austin – Was on a Disney show with Selena Gomez, most famous for dating his own stalker. 2016-08-30 10-31-09
Babyface – Singer? I think he sang. I know he produces music. This seems misguided for him. I think he’s successful. 2016-08-30 10-45-04
James Hinchcliffe – Canadian race car driver. I know, right? Who knew? 2016-08-30 10-44-21
Rick Perry – Was Governor of Texas, ran for President, all around boogie man. I got no idea why he’s doing this. 2016-08-30 10-43-55
Ryan Lochte – Olympic swimmer, professional douche bag, pretty to look at. 2016-08-30 10-38-08
Jana Kramer – I was totally lost on this one. Apparently she was on One Tree Hill. And she made an attempt at a music career, but I’ll assume it was a failed one since I never heard of her. 2016-08-30 10-37-09


“Dancing With the Stars” returns on Monday, Sept. 12 on ABC.