Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Megan Fox Slams Lindsay Lohan, Believes in Leprechauns

photo of megan fox pictures esquire 2013 pic
Oh my goodness, Megan Fox, what have you done? I can tell you part of what you’ve done … and you’re going to have to just go ahead and surmise the rest for yourself, because wow. Girl.

No, what you did was unexpectedly get pregnant, drop off the radar and didn’t exploit your pregnancy for all it was worth (like you just know some people have done and—ahem—are going to do), disappeared after your little son was born and then, when you finally did emerge, it was like this new person took your place. It was like everything formerly Megan Fox had dropped away, and there was this demure, intelligent, in touch person in Megan Fox’s place, who luckily looked the same as Megan Fox. I almost had a brain crush on Megan Fox for a minute, especially when she said that she wasn’t going to be posing in bikinis anymore—for the sake of her son, of course.

This new spread and interview with Esquire, though? Holy hell. It’s … well, here. This is what it is. Here’s Megan talking about Lindsay Lohan:

“She [Marilyn] was sort of like Lindsay [Lohan]. She was an actress who wasn’t reliable, who almost wasn’t insurable … She had all the potential in the world, and it was squandered. I’m not interested in following in those footsteps.”

On what it’s like to be famous:

“I don’t think people understand. They all think we should shut the f**kk up and stop complaining because you live in a big house or you drive a Bentley. What people don’t realize is that fame, whatever your worst experience in high school, when you were being bullied by those ten kids in high school, fame is that, but on a global scale, where you’re being bullied by millions of people constantly.”

On posing half-naked all the time, and then making the decision to not (after this shoot, of course):

“I felt powerless in that image. I didn’t feel powerful. It ate every other part of my personality, not for me but for how people saw me, because there was nothing else to see or know. That devalued me. Because I wasn’t anything. I was an image. I was a picture. I was a pose.”

On her belief the prior-mentioned leprechauns and other things:

“I like believing. I believe in all of these Irish myths, like leprechauns. Not the pot of gold, not the Lucky Charms leprechauns. But maybe was there something in the traditional sense? I believe that this stuff came from somewhere other than people’s imaginations … Loch Ness monster? There’s something to it. … I [also] believe in aliens.”

On the bible:

“I’ve read the Book of Revelation a million times,” Megan Fox says. “It does not make sense, obviously. It needs to be decoded. What is the dragon? What is the prostitute? What are these things? What is this imagery? What was John seeing? And I was just thinking, What is the Antichrist?”

And, ahem, on speaking tongues in church:

“I have seen magical, crazy things happen. I’ve seen people be healed. Even now, in the church I go to, during Praise and Worship I could feel that I was maybe getting ready to speak in tongues, and I’d have to shut it off because I don’t know what that church would do if I started screaming out in tongues in the back.”

… More on that tongue-speaking:

“It feels like a lot of energy coming through the top of your head — I’m going to sound like such a lunatic — and then your whole body is filled with this electric current. And you just start speaking, but you’re not thinking because you have no idea what you’re saying. Words are coming out of your mouth, and you can’t control it. The idea is that it’s a language that only God understands. It’s the language that’s spoken in heaven. It’s called ‘getting the Holy Ghost.’ “

I … I just can’t even. I’m going to turn this one over to you, guys, because there’s just too much here for me to pick apart. We’d be here all damn night.

13 CommentsLeave a comment

  • The main picture with the story… Have a look at her tummy; does it look weirdly fake and photoshopped to anyone else??

  • I haven’t seen the Transformers movies, and I ignored every picture of her that was posted anywhere for the longest time just because everybody was saying how hot she was. I figured she must be totally overrated, stuck up, and probably stupid. Then one day I looked a few pictures and watched a couple of interviews. I was wrong. Not only is she really beautiful without any airbrushing, but she’s actually really smart and has a wide range of interests. She doesn’t think she is the hottest thing on Earth and actually makes an effort to interact with her fans. I don’t think the ability to conceive of the unseen and things greater than yourself and be fascinated by those things is indicative of stupidity. It is narrowmindedness, a myopic view of the universe, and a lack of curiosity that are indicative of stupidity. It does seem unlikely that folktales that have persisted over thousands of years have no basis at all in reality. For the record, if you believe in neither aliens nor God, you are every much in the minority.

  • I don’t know. She made up the whole story about falling in love with a stripper for September 2008 GQ. So I take what she says with a grain of salt. Or it was true and she later lied about lying. Either way she clearly doesn’t know how to present herself. Whether she wants to stick out her tongue or speak in tongues, I honestly don’t care, I just hope she develops some self-respect because I actually find her talented. I don’t enjoy her film choices most of the time but in the few I do enjoy I really see something in her.

  • Oh dear. I hate to make fun of someone’s religion, but … oh dear.

    And yeah, the tummy looks odd.

  • Just another pretty face and shitty acting skills. That’s really all it takes these days to be famous in Hollywood eh?

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    This is my song title for Sexy Mrs.Megan Fox:Meg Babe

    This is my chorus for Sexy Mrs.Megan Fox:

    Meg Babe,Let’s Say,I was,Next Door,next to ya,Babe,I’ll bring,some Ice Cream,Every minute,everyday,read Babe,and.

    This is my verse 1 for Sexy,Mrs.Megan Fox:

    And,Girl,how it goes,I growed,Beautifully,glowing,everywhere,showing grace,when I’m out,having fun,shopping around,smoking smoking,come to Town,Sexy Babe,Let’s Clown,Getting down,having fun,Babe,I like when,it’s Sunny,Honey,Honey,Money Money,is for,us,Babe,no kidding,Joking Joking,I’m living,swell Babe,Hope you’re Well,Girl,Hell,I dwell,Angel,We’re,Heaven Sent,Babe,Yo.