Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Can Someone Tell Me What Happened to Mischa Barton’s Face?

photo of mischa barton pictures old face pic
Is it a terribly rude thing to say that someone looks like complete f-cking shit? Because OH MY GOD does Mischa Barton look like complete f-cking shit. What the hell happened here? Is this a result of really bad dental hygiene? Because Lindsay had the same problem and you know what she’s looking like these days, Lord.

Let’s break it down, though, shall we? Do I think that Meesh here got some facial surgery? Well, in a word, no. In four words, “yes definitely,” and “maxillofacial surgeon.” Do you know what maxillofacial surgery is? Here it is, defined:

… Maxillofacial surgery is surgery to correct a wide spectrum of diseases, injuries and defects in the head, neck, face, jaws and the hard and soft tissues of the oral and maxillofacial region.

Because I definitely think that’s the thing that’s happening here. Mischa has some kind of diseased, deformed head that needed some serious attention, and that’s why she looks like a blossoming meth head riding the meth express on her way to meth heaven.

Honestly, it was only a matter of time before her molars did her in. Don’t any of you remember this photo?:

photo of mischa barton eating raw meat gross teeth pics
Because I do. Oh yes, I do.

In related Mischa news, can you believe that Noel Gallagher (of Oasis fame) cast girlfriend in a music video? Because he did:

The ex-Oasis guitarist filmed the promo with the actress in Los Angeles at the end of last month and he believes it is one of the best videos he has made during his career.

Writing on his Tales From The Middle of Nowhere blog, he revealed: ”I had a shoot for my new single. That’ll be the 5th off this album which is unprecedented in all my time making records. This album is fast becoming my ‘Thriller’!!

”I played the part of a slightly hungover grumpy northern taxi driver which is just as well as that’s exactly what I felt like. I feel it’s some of my best work and most definitely worthy of at least one Bafta. That actress Mischa Barton was in it too. Nice girl. (Manchester) City fan would you believe!?!? (sic)”

Mischa, 26, spent most of the shoot running around in leopard-print underwear but the former “O.C.” star didn’t mind because she was so thrilled to be working with the ‘Dream On’ singer and his band the High Flying Birds.

She tweeted at the time: ”Doing Noel Gallagher’s video. Was so excited I barely slept and he didn’t disappoint!”

Well. I’d say “that explains her face,” but that wouldn’t make sense, now, would it? Then again, not many things need to make sense when you’re as methified as Mischa Barton apparently is.

15 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I see nothing wrong with her face. It looks like it’s just slightly altered with age. She looks healthy to me.

  • Well,um,hello there Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton,well,um,how are you,doing today,ma name is Ike Nash,& I came from the Caribbean,from an island,called St.Vincent & The Grenadines,but now I live,in toronto,in the country of Canada,& I am a very gorgeous & sweethearted,kid,& I am,29 years old,& I have written,for ya,a song & the name of it is called,Hello There Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton,& I have written this love song to the instrumental,of a song called Nuff Gal,using all of my very own lyrics,& Nuff Gal,was originally sang by a singer named Beenie Man,& the song Nuff Gal,came from off,of one of the reggae singer’s Beenie Man’s reggae albums,called Maestro,so dear Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton,here,is my love song that I,have written for ya,to the instrumental,of Nuff Gal,that was originally,sang by Beenie Man,using all of,my very own lyrics

    My song title:Hello There Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton

    My introduction before my chorus,for sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    Well,well,life is fun,girl,life,is fun,sipping,cool drinks,girl,in the,sun,girl,I’ll buy you,drinks,girl,hey,girl,I’ll buy you,drinks.

    My chorus for Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    Hey,girl,do you like to swim,girl,do,you play,tennis,having fun,girl,do you,drink after,you have played,girl,hey girl,I,think,you should,have fun,sipping,in the sun,girl,having fun,is the best,thing,girl,having,lunch,is also cool,girl,hey girl,I think you’re cool

  • Mischa Barton as of Now- 2012 is just 26 years old. In the picture adove she looks like age 42- 46. Something is Definitely wrong. The only thing i can think of is that she lied about her real age -only age 26 on Wikipedia, bcause she looks closer to 10 years over her listed age.

  • Well,yo,this here is a track for Mrs.Mischa Barton,& the name of it is called,Hey There Mam,& I wrote this track to the instrumental of a song called East 1999,using all of my own words/lyrics,& East 1999 was originally sang by a group called Bone Thugs N Harmony,& East 1999,that was originally sang by Bone Thugs N Harmony,came off from one of their cds called East 1999 Eternal,so dear Mrs.Mischa Barton,here is my love song for ya,that I wrote to the instrumental of East 1999 using my own words/lyrics

    My Song Title:Hey There Mam

    My introduction before my chorus for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    I don’t,need,no introduction,for this song,Mrs.Mischa

    Verse 1 for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    Hanging out,sitting down town,girl,yo,hey,honey,yo,how’s things,hope it’s cool,yo,so,hey,girl,I hang with James,you,can,sit with,me,plus hey,girl,if you need drinks,I will get you,some,but girl,not for any shame,not for you,to feel shame,girl,no,yo,no,you can feel very comfortable,at my table,I am able,girl,so,yo,hey babe,you can feel very special,when you relax,at my side,

  • Hello Mrs.Mischa Barton,well I will,just like to say something about the song that was written above this song that I am about to write,okay first of all,while preparing to write that song I was feeling very very extremely merry plus happy,but I was interupted by an evil person,someone that was plus is cursed,yep,that person saw me,how gorgeous I looked,how blessed I looked,so they came in ma path,like an Amalekite,and an Amalekite are folks that God does not like,so he commanded his servant Samuel,to tell a king of isreal called Saul,to consume them,but anyhow,I was very very merry plus extremely happy when I was about to write that song that was written above this,but anyhow,I can do more than just write love songs,for ya,but um,my name is Ike Nash,plus I live in Ontario in the country called canada,but I originally came from the caribbean from the island called St.Vincent & The Grenadines,plus I will like to say,that the love song that I have written above this one here was not written to the fullest of my truest potentials,I was going to write it better but I was interupted by a whole bunch of losers plus creepy looking folks,but um anyhow,I am very very gorgeous looking plus very very pleasant to look upon,& um maybe some other time whenever the time is right I will rewrite that same song over for you,but um anyhow,here is another love song that I have written for you,& the name of it is called Honey That Thuggish Ruggish,& I have written this love song for you,to the instrumental of a song called Be Careful,using all of ma very own words/lyrics,& um,the song called Be Careful,was originally sang by a rapper named Bizzy Bone,plus the song called Be Careful,that was originally sang by the singer named Bizzy Bone comes off from one of his cd albums called The Gift,so um,here is ma love song for you,that I have written to the instrumental, of Be Careful,using all of my very own words/lyrics

    My love song title:Honey That Thuggish Ruggish

    Verse 1 for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    One day,bay-bay,girl,I’ll write,you,movies,plus,I,don’t fuss,girl,I’m very happy,so babe,hey,come here,I will,make you very happy,plus girl,hey,this song,is to make,cheer you,up,girl,I don’t curse,plus,I,like your purse,girl,hey,honey,I will put,some money,in it

    My chorus for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    I don’t complain,about fame,being famous,girl,is great,but,girl,still,please be careful,girl,hey,about things,especially,when you’re looking very sexy

    My last verse for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    I’ll,be careful,girl,plus,you,should too,I,won’t,treat you,like garbage,I’m too,cool,plus you’re very smooth,girl,plus so,cute,honey,I am thuggish ruggish

  • Um,hello there again,Mrs.Mischa Barton,once again my name is Ike Nash,& um,I live in Toronto in the country called Canada,plus you can reach me at 416.752.2165 for another screenplay/movie script,& um,this is a screenplay/movie script that I have written for you,& I think that you should create plus produce it as your next new film,plus if you like I think that you should add your very own ideas to it,& this screenplay/television movie script is an idea of mine of what I think should be your next new comedy plus romance film,it was all written plus made up by me Ike Nash,& the name of it should be called Hello There,& the story/theme of this movie should be based upon this:

    One bright plus early friday morning,while you(Mrs.Mischa Barton),was having brunch,with some of your very awesome cool female friends,you were spotted by a fashion designer,while he was walking by the cafe that you(Mrs.Mischa Barton plus your friends)were having brunch at,so then he walked over to you(Mrs.Mischa Barton),then introduced himself to you,then he made a joke with you & asked you if you came down from the heights of heaven,so then you told him yes,that you did,so then he asked you if you will like to appear on some of his television company’s TV shows,with all of your friends,so then you(Mrs.Mischa Barton plus your friends)accepted his offer,to be on some of his company’s TV shows,so then he give you his television company’s telephone number,plus you give him your telephone number as well,so then the very next day he called you(Mrs.Mischa Barton),& asked you,if you will like to have lunch with him & the owner of the company that he worked for,so then you(Mrs.Mischa Barton)said sure why not,so then while having lunch,you both began laughing & talking making all sorts of jokes,with each other,then the very next day,you(Mrs.Mischa Barton & all of your friends)all appeared on one the fashion designer’s TV shows,modeling plus making all sorts of jokes with each other,then after the show was over you(Mrs.Mischa Barton plus all of your friends)all went to a very awesome house party,that was hosted by the film company,then you all had a very awesome time there,then the very next day,you(Mrs.Mischa Barton)appeared on another show again that was hosted by the same company,so you modeled on the show in some very cool outfits that was created by the fashion designer,then after the show was over you got a little bit drunken after celebrating your success on the show,then you went for a limosuine ride throughout the city drinking on some alcoholic beverages,then the very next day,you(Mrs.Mischa Barton plus all of your friends)modeled on another yet again successful TV show,in some very awesome looking outfits,then after the show was over you all went downtown to have a very awesome dinner,then in the ending of this movie you(Mrs.Mischa Barton plus all of your friends)became very happier plus more successful,then you all lived happily ever after.

    The end

    Dear sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton,that was my idea for you of what I think should be your next new comedy plus romance film,plus if you like I think that these other actors plus actresses will also help to make this film a very huge success & they are Mrs.Jessica Biel,Mrs.Megan Fox,Mrs.Carrie Underwood,Mr.Ashton Kutcher,Mr.Charlie Sheen plus Mr.Justin Timberlake,& um,maybe if you like you should telephone them up,then ask them to be a part of your new film,have an awesome evening

  • Um,hello there Mrs.Mischa Barton,well,um I hope that you got ma screenplay movie that I have written for,ya,take care plus enjoy

  • This,is,a rap song,for Mrs.Mischa Barton,plus,before,I continue,allow,me,to re-introduce,myself,my name,is Ike Michael Nash,plus,I reside,in the,city,named,Toronto,in the country,named,Canada,and I,am God’s,very youngest,kid/son,plus,I
    am,a very,angelic,plus,sexy,looking guy,and if you,Mrs.Mischa
    Barton,shall ever happen,to,be,in the city,of Toronto,in the country,named,Canada,at the ending,of this,month,which is the
    month of January,I strongly think,that you,should visit and come into,a very nice Restaurant,named,The Only Cafe,which is located,
    in a very nice neighbourhood,named,Donlands On Danforth Ave East,which is also,located,in the city named,Toronto,in the nation,named,Canada,and the time and,date,of this month that you,Sexy Mrs.Mischa Barton,should arrive,there,at,The Only Cafe,is at,6:30 PM,on the 27th of January 2013,and if you,should arrive there,on this date plus time,I shall surely buy,you supper along,with some fruit juice,plus,for now,this is a rap song,that I,have written,for you,and the name,of it,is called,Be My Model,and I wrote,this very romantic rap song,to the instrumental,of a song,named,The Boss,using,all of,my very own,Lyrics,and the rap song,named,The Boss,was originally,sang by two,rappers,named,Rick Ross,featuring another rapper,named,T-Pain,so this,is my,very romantic rap song,for,Mrs.Mischa Barton,that I,have written,to the instrumental,of the rap song,named,The Boss,that was,originally rapped,by the rappers,named,Rick Ross,featuring,another,singer named,T-Pain,using,all,of,my very,own Lyrics,take it,Merrily,Miss/Ms,see ya,bye now.

    This,is the name of,my very romantic song,for,Sexy,Mrs.Mischa Barton:Be My Model

    This is,my verse 1,for Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    Be my,Model,opening,Bottles,Bottles,of Baileys,be my,Honey,Babe,every summer,down,to,the Winter,you,should,model,for me,Sexy Babe,Be,my Barbie,Doll,any day,all,week,everyday,in,May,Girl,you’re,so Sexy,plus,this,is,what,I’ll say,Open,a,bottle,of,Liquor,for,me,Babe,
    plus,Babe,Going,to the stores,down,the streets,everyday,going,down,the streets,smelling,sweet,everyday,walking,in,the stores,smelling,sweet,I’ll,pay,all,for,your,dinners,Babe,plus,I’m,

    This,is,my,chorus for,Mrs.Mischa Barton:

    Going,to,the Bars,like,the Stars,I’m,Brave,Walking,through,the,malls,always,Smart,Hottie,
    Movies,any day.