Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Robert Downey Jr. Has a Cool Murse

Robert Downey Jr and Wife Susan with Matt Damn and Wife Luciana Barroso Have Dinner in Miami, Pictures, Photos

Okay, look, I thought he was sober these days. But you have to be pretty fucking high to wear that thing as a straight man.

Bob Downey and his wife Susan had dinner with Matt Damon and his stupid unfamous wife-who-should-have-been-me, Luciana Boring-oso, at Quattro Gastronomia Italiana Restaurant in Miami.

I would not want to eat at that place. “Quattro Gastronomia” sounds like an intestinal disease, not a restaurant. Here it is used in a sentence: I hope Luciana Boring-oso gets quattro gastronomia and has to be hospitalized for the rest of her life, so Matt Damon can be mine.

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  • Quote from Matt Damon:

    “What I want to do is a character-driven porn movie. It’s all going to be about characters, and the porn’s gonna grow all out of the character’s and it’s going to serve as character development.”

    I could write, produce, shoot, edit, box, sell, and make this work. Call me Matt.

    On Poor Roberto:
    By that look on his head, I bet he wasn’t expecting pictures. His right hand, I think, gives it away.

  • I’m not convinced that Robert Downey Jr IS entirely straight, so the bag is probably not an indication that he’s not sober… ;-)

  • Italians are definitely better lovers (speaking as one). Aryan people are just jealous because of that, plus the fact that we’re exotic and much more interesting.