Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Will.i.am

will.i.am Thinks Taylor Swift Is “Dope”, Wants to Work With Her

taylor swift will.i.am

will.i.am is pretty much the worst and I can’t stand the sight of him – which is too bad for me since he turns up EVERYWHERE and we can’t seem to get rid of him no matter how hard we try. Now he wants to try and make himself even more relevant by collaborating with… Taylor Swift? Dear God.

From E! News:

“Taylor Swift is dope,” will.i.am told me earlier this week before performing at a music festival in Norway.

“I’d like to work with Taylor Swift. I like the girl. We could do something really fantasy-like. That would be cool.”

Why is everything “dope”? Why does he think she would want to do something “fantasy-like” (whatever that even means) with him? All of this is just so wrong. Don’t get me wrong – I like a few Black Eyed Peas songs, admittedly, but ever since he went solo, he’s started ruining everything he touches. I know some people would say Taylor Swift is bad enough on her own, but come on.

will.i.am Has ADHD, Which Is… Ooh, What’s That Shiny Thing?

will.i.am

Before everyone gets their knickers in a twist, ADHD is a serious issue, blah blah blah, but yes there’s treatment for it and no, it’s not life threatening, so lighten up. Anyway, it might explain why will.i.am is so f-cking annoying all the time – he suffers from the disorder.

Will’s had ADHD for years, but he doesn’t take Ritalin or any other drugs for it. Instead, music is his cure and he’s learned how to control it. Incidentally, sometimes things like ADD/ADHD and related issues can actually be a positive thing for artists, and since he’s rich and inexplicably famous now, it seems to have all worked out for him.

From The Mirror:

“I have ADHD. I’ll admit it. Did you hear about the elephant that got into that fight with a gorilla? Sorry, that’s my ADHD kicking in.

“I’ve got all this stuff in my head at the same time as I’m doing stuff and I don’t know how to stop or slow down. But it’s all good because I know how to control it.”

The American music producer has revealed how music, not anti-hyperactivity drug Ritalin, is his cure for the condition.

He says: “For every obstacle there’s some type of solution. So if you have ADHD it’s your passion point. One thing I learned about ADHD is that it’s hard to keep your attention and you can’t sit still and you’re always moving and thinking about a whole bunch of things.

“But those traits work well for me in studios and in meetings about creative ideas. I’ve figured out a place for it. If you listen to the songs I write, they are the most ADHD songs ever. They have five hooks in one and it all happens in three minutes. I figured out a way of working with it.”

And Will, whose new album #willpower is out now, also manages to avoid feeling down through his love of music.

He added: “If I was stuck at a different job I’d be horrible and wouldn’t survive. Music is my therapy and my straitjacket. Music keeps me sane and keeps my mind on something. It’s fragile up there.

“My mind would wander, and if it wanders then that’s not good because I could scare myself thinking of weirdo stuff. Music brings control to my thoughts. It’s not escape – it’s just order. I’m making order out of a disorder.”

To be honest, I’m not at all surprised by this revelation. will.i.am is always so all over the place and hyper that it kinda makes sense. I’m trying to be nice today (heh), so I’ll just say good for him for figuring it all out.

will.i.am Admits He Stole a Song, But He’ll Make It Better!

will.i.am

I’m not sure what’s more annoying about will.i.am: his face, his voice, the fact that he calls everything “dope”, his inflated ego, those stupid periods in his name, his friendship with Justin Bieber, the fact that he totally steals songs… Well, let’s concentrate on the latter, for now.

Right, so the track ‘Let’s Go’ featuring Chris Brown (double ugh) from Will’s new album #willpower (dumb) is a rip off of Arty and Rat Zo’s ‘Rebound’. Billy didn’t clear the rights before using the beat, nor did he acknowledge that he’d taken it… until he was called out, of course.

Arty and Zo seem like nice bros, so here’s what each of them said on Twitter and Facebook, respectively:

“I really and truly appreciate all the support you are giving me and Arty in response to will.i.am’s copyright infringement. However, this doesn’t excuse the horrific abuse you’re sending the way of will.i.am and Chris Brown, and it especially doesn’t excuse being racist.”


Anyhoo, William went on KIIS-FM to discuss this whole thing yesterday (thanks to DS for the transcript) and admitted that he definitely took the song but promising that he’s “fix it” – probably by trying to pay Arty and Zo off:

“So this song by Chris Brown ‘Let’s Go’. Arty is a dope producer so I wrote this song to rebound this last year.

“I got in touch with Arty and showed it to him, did a different version to it ’cause I asked him [to] make it newer ’cause I don’t just wanna take your song and rap over it. But we did that, we collaborated.

“But in a year’s time, time’s gone by [and] we preferred writing over and using the [original] rebound. Something happened and the clearance… hopefully we resolved the issue.

“I’m a fan of Arty; I think he’s great and the world needs to know about how talented those guys are. It’s sad that it’s turned into a fiasco but hopefully it’s resolved because I’m a fan of those guys to the point where I wrote to their instrumental.”

Asked if he had originally collaborated with Arty on the song, he replied: “No, I heard his ‘Rebound’ and then wrote a song to it and then contacted them last year. A year has passed and we’re fixing it now.”

“Do you like James Brown? Love James Brown. He changed Hip-Hop. People sample. You heard the song ‘American Boy’ by Estelle? That original, I did the original instrumental on my song on my album Songs by Girls.”

Stop trying to justify it, man. You stole the beat and thought they weren’t popular enough for you to ever get caught, but you did. Now pay up and shut up.

The Daily Bieber: Justin Banned From Austrian Club, Pattie Mallette to the Rescue?

justin bieber

I know we’re all tired of Justin Bieber (and I’m particularly tired of typing the word “asshole” over and over again), but he can’t seem to stay out of the news for longer than 24 hours and refuses to tone down his… assholery (?) so that we can stop writing about him. After smuggling a monkey – and no, that’s not a euphemism – to Germany and refusing to pay for a tattoo, the latest news comes all the way from Austria, where this punk ass has been banned from a nightclub for having his entourage/security team bust up the camera phones of fans enjoying themselves/taking a few snaps.

From The Austrian Times:

Baby Pop singer Justin Bieber has been banned from Vienna’s trendiest nightclub.

He went to the Passage club in Vienna, Austria – built on the site of a converted underground station – where he was surrounded by bodyguards.

According to the management at the club the bodyguards then smashed cameras of fans in the club, destroyed mobile telephones and even groped some of the young girl fans who reportedly left in tears after the Saturday morning assaults.

Club manager Joachim Bankel confirmed: “Justin Bieber is no longer welcome here.”

UGH, this fucking kid. Can he not just be banned from, like, planet earth as a whole?

In other news, will.i.am still thinks anyone gives a shit what he has to say about, well, anything, and is still sounding off on Bieber. His most recent pearl of wisdom saw him claiming that Justin’s money sponge mother, Pattie Mallette, will get him back on track. You know, despite being done with parenting him and all.

From The Daily Telegraph:

“Justin’s going to be okay. It’s dangerous to be a child star, but it’s dangerous to be a child in the ghetto, or to be a child at school being bullied.

“If you have good parents, you’ll be all right. Justin’s mom is great.”

When we eject Justin into space, let’s send will.i.am with him, shall we?

Justin Bieber Is Getting Advice From will.i.am Now, I Guess

justin bieber pics

Justin Bieber isn’t having a very good 2013 so far. He’s showed up hours late for his own concerts, been kicked out of two clubs, got in a fight with a photographer and canceled another show over what seems to be low ticket sales. His transformation into complete and utter waste of space seems nearly complete!  But if you’re going to have your head so far up your own asshole you can’t see the light of day, you’ll want to consult someone who’s been there, done that, right? Enter will.i.am!

From Channel 5 News (via DigitalSpy):

will.i.am has now referred to Bieber’s troubles and questionable behavior as a mere “bump in the road”, insisting that he is still “a good kid”.

“I already gave [advice] to him on the phone, he’s good, he’s a good kid,” the Voice UK coach told Channel 5 News. “When you’re 17, 18, 19, 20 the world can get you off course but he’s gonna be alright.

“He has a good family, good people around him. Just every once in a while there’s a bump in the road.”

The “bump” in this case is more like a giant crater that’s going to swallow the earth and all its inhabitants into a black hole of his ass hattery, but okay, WILLIAM. Second of all, the world doesn’t get you off course, but way too much money, a mother who just wants you as a cash cow and otherwise probably would have still been thinking about the abortion she was going to have, “friends” who want to reap the benefits of your work, employees who are enablers because they don’t want to lose their jobs and record labels who want to make as much off you as they can before the world forgets about your stupid, skinny ass will definitely get you off course.

Also, shut up, will.i.am. You don’t even go here!

If You Keep Condoms in Your House, Will.I.Am Thinks You’re Tacky

A photo of Will.I.Am

What’s that?  You keep condoms in your house because you’re smart?  You think it’s good to be prepared?  You actually listened in sex ed?  Well, fuck all you heard, because Will.I.Am has spoken some gospel to Elle, and the verdict?  Condoms are OUT!

ELLE: If you walked into a woman’s house, what one item would convince you that you weren’t compatible?

W: If she had condoms in her house, that would just fuckin’ throw me off. That’s just tacky.

ELLE: Well, okay, I could see if she had a candy bowl full of them on the coffee table. But if she’s got a few in a drawer, wouldn’t that simply suggest she’s health-conscious?

W: I just think, like, if you’re into someone and you guys get to that level, then that’s something you should converse about together and say, “Hey, maybe we should get some.”

I was going to do that thing I do where I pretend that Will.I.Am is as wonderful as he thinks he is, but I just don’t have the heart today. Condoms are “tacky,” really?  What an ignorant, careless thing to say.  I don’t need to rant about STDs or unplanned pregnancies, you guys are smart enough to get that, but I just can’t believe that Will is douche enough to say these things in an interview.

Are there any redeeming qualities at all in Will.I.Am anymore, or is he just an annoying, pretentious shell of a man these days?

The Black Eyed Peas Are Way Above “My Humps” Nowadays

When you’re as distinguished and talented an artist as Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas, you have an extensive, enviable repertoire, you know?  You have dozens upon dozens of powerful pieces to choose from at any given performance, and it’s up to you to decide which particular gift you want to give your audience.  Tragically, Will has made the choice to retire one of his most well-known, most well-loved masterpieces, “My Humps.” Check out his official statement:

“It got to the point where we didn’t want to play ‘My Humps’ no more. You know, ’cause ‘I met a girl down at the disco,’ I just didn’t want to say that no more, lyrically. It wasn’t like my best lyrically, but it was fun. It wasn’t lyrical miracles, but the beat was rocking, so we throw the beat in there and just let the beat linger.”

I never knew that Will was so modest.  “It wasn’t lyrical miracles,” please.  When I hear Will ask that timeless question, “what you gonna do with all that ass, all that ass inside them jeans?”  I weep.  But, just as Van Gogh could not paint Starry Night for all his days, the Black Eyed Peas must move on to new artistic endeavors.  I can only hope that they fill the lovely lady lump-shaped hole in my heart soon.