So I’m pretty obsessed with these photos of Violet Affleck leaving the Santa Monica library with her famous mom yesterday because this little gremlin reminds me of someone very special: Me.
The glasses, the whole “sticking library books in her mouth” thing, the spastic arm and leg movements mid-walk. Yeah, all of that looks very familiar to this lady over here and honestly, God bless her. She’s probably going to grow up to be a wonderful woman.
But all of that self-centered shit aside, doesn’t she remind you of one of Amy Poehler’s best SNL characters ever? Jennifer Garner is totally the best mom in the world.
I guess technically I don’t know if he’s “crazed” like the headline reads, but the man who was charged for stalking Jennifer Garner is definitely creepy looking. And stalking generally isn’t sane behavior, so I would think that it’s fair to call him crazed. I don’t want to get sued or something. He’s probably a fine guy who just happens to loiter outside of the elementary school that his favorite celebrity’s child attends. Whatever, no judgement.
The L.A. District Attorney has charged Steven Burky with two counts of felony stalking and two misdemeanor counts of disobeying a court order — for allegedly breaking a restraining order the couple filed against him last year.
Garner has claimed in court documents that Burky has been stalking her since 2002. She was granted the restraining order last year after Burky sent her “packages and letters containing delusional and paranoid thoughts.”
Now, if convicted on stalking charges, Burky — who’s currently in police custody — could face up to four years in prison.
Four years seems like an awfully short period of time to spend in prison for breaking a restraining order and potentially putting the life of a child (a beautiful celebrity child, right guys!?!) in danger. Let’s hope this whackjob gets some heeee-eeelllllp.
Violet Affleck and her pretty pink camera play a little game of “paparazzi” with the paparazzi while she and mom Jen Garner run errands in Santa Monica. This is really one ridiculously photogenic little girl. She’s going to end up in movies, just you watch. They won’t be able to stop her. This kid loooves the cameras.
You guys, I think I just spontaneously got pregnant. These photos of Jen Garner running errands with Violet and Seraphina are pretty much as effective as actual semen when it comes to knocking up a 20-something woman. I can’t tell if I have morning sickness or I’m just nauseous from the cuteness overdose.
Either way, I’m going to name my unborn child Gigli.
OK, maybe the headline is a bit much, but what the hell is Jennifer Garner doing with her babies that makes them little smile-machines? Garner and her hubby Ben Affleck took their older daughter Violet and baby Seraphina out to brunch in Cambridge, MA this morning and little Seraphina was smiling the entire time, just like her big sis is always seen doing. Perhaps they’ve paid off their children to be two of the happiest looking celeb kids out there (Suri can barely be bothered to grin) or they’re just feeding them candy and taking them on unicorn rides all day, but whatever it is, they’re doing something right…
Before there was Suri, before there was Shiloh, there was just one insanely cute celebrity child stealing our hearts: Violet Affleck. This morning Vi and her mom, Jennifer Garner, went out in a pyjamies-clad Starbucks run in Brentwood. Hitching a ride on her mom’s hip, the three year old also wore her smile for the paps and the barista.
It seems like every time we get a round of rumors about Ben Affleck and Jen Garner calling it quits, we get another set of photos of them walking through a park with their adorable daughters.
Here’s Ben and Jen, along with Seraphina and Violet, looking very much the happy family in Boston today.