Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Suzanne Somers

Best And Worst Celebrity Looks Of The Week!

Jude Law is excited!

Jude Law is excited!

Time for another round of Best and Worst Celebrity Looks of the Week! Since I covered Golden Globes fashion here, I won’t be highlighting any of that in this post. You’re welcome.

Check out what some celebs were wearing this week and then make your picks for who looked the BEST, WORST, and most WTF.

Which celeb ripped off Sharon Stone‘s 1998 Oscars look? Which celeb ripped off another author’s book cover? And which celeb probably ripped off their dress at the end of the night and thought, “WTF was I thinking?”

Let’s get to it, babies!

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Don’t Worry, Suzanne Somers Is Getting Down

suzanne somers grove extra

Suzanne Somers has a great sex life, in case you were wondering. Were you? If you were, please holla.I want to e-meet the person who was concerned about Suzanne Somers’ sex life. WELL, SHE’D DOING OKAY!! She’s 66, and she’s getting it and getting down and etc. From People:

He’s on hormones and I’m on hormones. I’m going to be so sorry I said that. What is it about men at four in the morning? And then I’m really awake around eight or so. We have busy mornings.

THERE YOU GO! Just something to think about before that Step By Step reunion happens, which we all know WILL HAPPEN.

Okay, just in case, show of hands: who would watch a Step by Step reunion?

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Do You Guys Remember “Step By Step”? Patrick Duffy Does. He Wants A Reunion

step by step

Patrick Duffy starred in the 90′s classic TGIF show Step By Step, a cheesy show about a family and a dude who lives in a van in the family’s backyard. By classic, I mean ~~only 90′s kids will get this~~ type of classic. I loved this stupid show. And Patrick Duffy was pretty good in it. He always made me laugh. Suzanne Somers played Duffy’s wife.

I guess Mr. Duffy’s career has slowed down — a lot — because he’s totally up for a Step By Step reunion. If the Boy Meets World spinoff happened this many years later, I guess anything is possible.

As told to The Hollywood Reporter:

I would love to work with Suzanne [Somers] again.The Step By Step cast was so wonderful to be with. They were my family and I think a little two-hour special about where these people are – not a documentary, but actually doing a show – seeing where they all come to over the years. It would be so fun to play that goofy Frank Lambert character again, aging another 25 years.

Well thanks a lot, asshole and assholes at The Hollywood Reporter, because now I have the Step By Step theme song in my head. I’m taking you bastards down with me.

Suzanne Somers Continues to Share Her Medical Knowledge

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Last month Suzanne Somers was flapping her over-inflated lips — and speaking of huge lips, nice jeans Suzanne! — about Patrick Swayze and how chemotherapy basically killed him.  It’s no surprise that she has a book out this month (her 19th), “Knockout”, which is about seeking alternative methods to treating cancer.

It’s great that Suzanne Somers wants to explore non-traditional approaches to deal with her own health.  But she also claims that chemotherapy isn’t effective in treating lung and breast cancer.  Somers survived breast cancer after a lumpectomy and radiation.

The American Cancer Society is concerned.

“I am very afraid that people are going to listen to her message and follow what she says and be harmed by it,” says Dr. Otis Brawley, the organization’s chief medical officer. “We use current treatments because they’ve been proven to prolong life. They’ve gone through a logical, scientific method of evaluation. I don’t know if Suzanne Somers even knows there IS a logical, scientific method.”

More broadly, Brawley is concerned that in the United States, celebrities or sports stars feel they can use their fame to dispense medical advice. “There’s a tendency to oversimplify medical messages,” he says. “Well, oversimplification can kill.”

Suzanne Somers needs to shut her mouth.  She’s certainly entitled to an opinion, but she’s a celebrity and there are some whackos out there who will make medical decisions based on what Suzanne Somers has to say.  Frightening, but true.  Saying that chemo isn’t effective in the battle against cancer is wholly irresponsible.  People’s lives have been saved by that poison.

And regarding the whole Swayze snafu, Somers issued your basic, insincere apology to his family:  “I shouldn’t have said anything.  I apologized to his family.  We all know that chemotherapy does nothing for pancreatic cancer.”

Suzanne Somers: “Patrick Swayze Was Poisoned”

Suzanne Somers in 2007

I love it when celebs pontificate on complex issues such as Middle Eastern politics or life-saving medical treatment, as if being able to cry on cue makes them an expert in every field. Suzanne Somers is particularly adroit at this method of putting her perky little foot in her perky little mouth.

Recently, Somers — whose oncological experience consists of one season of Three’s Company and stage kissing Patrick Duffy –  asserted that Patrick Swayze died not from pancreatic cancer, but because his doctors poisoned him with chemotherapy.

“They took a beautiful man,” Somers said, “and put poison in his body. Why couldn’t they have built him up nutritionally and gotten rid of the toxins?… I hate to be this controversial… but I have to speak out.”

Of course! Everyone knows that the cure for aggressive pancreatic cancer is organic veggies and squeezing out a few rounds on your ThighMaster.

It’s too bad Ms. Somers has not yet discovered a cure for leather neck-itis

How Is This Better Than Just Getting Old?

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Suzanne Somers went on Oprah and lost her damn mind. She showed what I’m sure was a cringing audience her entire routine (with the exception of the vaginal injection) on air, which includes some 40 pills, hormone rubdowns, and exceptional suppression of the gag reflex (pssst it’s the secret to her marriage). Somers claims that doing this helps her beat the “Seven Dwarfs of Menopause: Itchy, Bitchy, Sleepy, Sweaty, Bloated, Forgetful and All Dried Up.” Fox News

 

She begins with rubbing a syringe of estrogen on one arm, every day. For two weeks out of the month, she rubs progesterone on the other.

 

After that, she injects estriol vaginally, which she graciously spared the audience from watching.

But it doesn’t end there.

She can’t start her day without taking 40 pills, 15 of which she downs in a thick, yellow smoothie her husband makes for her (she says it’s the secret to their marriage!). Then she ends her day with an additional 20 pills at night before bed.

 

 

Now, I’m not saying that Suzanne Somers doesn’t look amazing for a 62 year old, but she is starting to take on certain muppet-like qualities. I think I would rather age gracefully than vaginally inject ANYTHING ever or choke down a 15-pill smoothie. This is not natural. She says she’s “not against going under the knife” but wouldn’t it ultimately be easier and cheaper to do a little nip/tuck maintenance instead of rubbing raw hormones into your flesh? Not to mention I got “Bitchy, Sleepy, Sweaty, Bloated, Forgetful” dwarves kickin it at my place once a month for about 4 days and I’m 23. Those assholes are not limited to Menopause.