0Rob Pattinson Drives His Crappy Truck Full Of Belongings Off Into The Sunset

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are apparently really over, because the actor was photographed driving his crappy truck stuffed with all of his crappy possessions off into the rolling hills of Los Feliz. I’m sparing you with one photo; The Daily Mail posted 9. photos of the same effing truck, from slightly different angles and varying distances. Nine. How effing creepy and weird is that? To have someone photograph you doing the sad break-up move-out?

Although maybe there’s a different explanation for this. Maybe he’s just helping a friend with a yard sale. lolz.

Apparently the couple discovered they “grew apart” and that’s what ended it, but it really all depends on who you ask. Some say they’re not completely broken up. For example, The Daily Mail says they’re trying something out where they’re allowed to see other people, while TMZ is insisting that Kristen Stewart is actually a hologram. So the whole thing is really very confusing. Kind of like Beyoncé’s “pregnancy.” Then again, maybe this is all Katy Perry’s fault???

Expect Rob to buy a bar soon. Trust me.

May 21, 2013 at 5:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

1RPattz and KStew “Grew Apart” In the Span of 10 Days

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have called it quits again, and while many might think that the crack in their relationship appeared when KStew let Rupert Sanders go down on her in an “empty” (save for the paps) parking lot last year, you’re wrong. They were all fine and well! Relationships can totally survive cheating and not be completely destructive after that! Everything was going great, according to People, until Rob returned to LA from New York on May 8, when Kristen and Rob’s usual moodiness took on a darker tone and they “grew apart“. Well, okay.

The exes, who were inseparable just weeks ago, grew distant since Pattinson returned from New York to Los Angeles on May 8.

“They again went from spending every second together, to spending more time apart at their separate houses,” a source tells PEOPLE. “Kristen has been in a terrible mood, and it was obvious that things were not great with Rob.”

A major sign pointing to the demise of their romance was the absence of Stewart, 23, on May 13, the date of Pattinson’s 27th birthday.

“It was very strange that they didn’t celebrate Rob’s birthday together,” the source says. “He had friends over at his house, but Kristen was not part of the celebration. For the past few days, they have not spent any time together.”

Reacting the same as when they last split after Stewart’s fling with her Snow White and the Huntsman director Rupert Sanders, the source says the actress once again “[hasn't left] her house for days, but [has] surrounded herself with friends 24/7.”

LOL, I mean, whatever and all. They’ll end up back together soon enough after Rob has cried over a bottle of whisky and written some more emo songs and Kristen has smoked 20 bongs and launched a few more gay rumours. I kinda root for these two, despite the fact that Kristen cheated which is the more reprehensible behaviour in a relationship and I know I could never forgive it myself.

On a side note, did you know that neither Netflix nor Hulu Plus has any of the Twilight movies up for streaming, but they do have a parody movie called Breaking Wind? Not that I’m speaking from experience of having searched for them earlier this weekend or anything.

May 20, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer

2Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart May Have Broken Up Again

RPattz and KStew are a match made in cheating vampire heaven, and there’s nothing that can tear them apart. Well, not for long, anyway. For now, however, not even Grandma’s pearl ring can keep them together and they’ve decided to call it quits long enough for Kristen to hook up with Rupert Sanders again and for Rob to perform an emo acoustic set at some seedy LA open mic night. In other words, it’s not forever.

From People:

As rumors of relationship trouble continue to swirl, a source tells PEOPLE that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have called it quits after more than three years of dating. Reps for the two could not be reached.

But the source says it would not be surprising if the on-and-off-again pair got back together again.

The news follows online reports that Pattinson ditched out on his 27th birthday plans arranged by Stewart.

Oh my God, how could this be happening? More importantly, will Nutty Madam issue a statement? One can hope so. Speaking of hopes, I’m not giving up on the OTP that is KStew/TNast.

May 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

2Robert Pattinson May Have Given Kristen Stewart His Grandmother’s Pearl Ring

It was Kristen Stewart‘s 23rd birthday last week, and to celebrate,  on-again boyfriend Robert Pattinson apparently decided it was a good opportunity to hand over a precious family heirloom: his grandmother’s pearl ring. Apparently he didn’t bother to put it in a box or leave a card or anything, he just wrapped some tissue around it and slipped it through her mailbox, which is a surefire way to get something thrown in the trash, in my books.

Anyway, here’s the scoop from OK Magazine:

“Rob gave Kristen his grandmother’s treasured pearl ring,” a source said.

“He just casually wrapped it in tissue, put it in an envelope and slipped it into her mailbox. No note, no words, just the ring. It was a huge statement on Rob’s part symbolising his full forgiveness of Kristen and his renewed trust in her future.”

Pattinson also bought Stewart a number of other gifts, including a pen worth $53,000 to add to her collection.

The insider added: “There was the latest chain and bracelet set from Versace, and a Hermès silk scarf.

“He also managed to get hold of an original vinyl copy of her favorite Van Morrison song, ‘Madame George’.”

There are so many things to “LOL” and “WTF?” about here. First of all, a $53,000  pen? I begrudge spending $1.99 on a pack of Bics. Second of all, ‘Madame George’ is KStew’s favourite Van Morrison song? ‘Beside You’ is a way better track on Astral Weeks, but to each her own, I guess.

This story is probably total bullshit anyway, and KStew doesn’t really seem like the diamonds and pearls type (?D to the I to the A to the M…?), but whatever.

April 18, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

8Robert Pattinson Might Be Living with Kristen Stewart Again

Robert Pattinson finished with Kristen Stewart a while ago, but if there’s one thing we all know, it’s that Robsten is unbroken. Or… something. People just won’t let these two break up like they were always going to do anyway, and now that they’ve been seen in the same place again – namely, the birthday party for Katy Perry‘s assistant (and Kristen’s possible LOVAH), Tamra Natisin. Because two people can’t be in the same place without f-cking, didn’t you know?

Now some source has gone over to Hollywood Life and started spouting off about how Rob’s living at Kristen’s again and there’s even wedding bells in their future. Well, that’s the most untrue (and disastrous) bullshit I’ve heard in a while:

A friend of Kristen’s tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY, “Rob is living at Kristen’s. He considers it his home, Kristen’s there, their dogs are there and most of his stuff is there — that is whatever is most important to him. He considers Kristen’s home, his home too. I guess his home is where is heart is. And right from the get go Kristen made it clear that it was also his home.”

Our insider says that Rob, 26, and Kristen, 22, are recovering from their trial separation quite nicely. “Again they have been inseparable since Rob’s gotten back. I think the distance did them good. Rob isn’t showing any signs of needing any sort of space from Kristen, that’s for sure.”

As previously reported, a source close to KStew told us that she’s regained her confidence in the relationship. “Kristen is confident that her relationship With Rob is stronger than ever and has no problem whatsoever with Rob wanting to take things slow. They have been together pretty much non-stop since he’s been back. He has just only arrived but the first person he wanted to see and spend time with is Kristen, and of course Bear and Bernie.”

Listen, I like Rob and I like Kristen (or at least don’t give enough of a shit about them to hate them) but this is just not going to work. Kristen is too much of a stone cold butch bitch to cater to Rob’s emo ways (LOVE U, ROB) and she’s also GAYYYYYYYY (or maybe that’s just wishful thinking). Sorry, I’m Team Tamsten on this one. I mean, come on:

March 22, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer

0Robert Pattinson Is Apparently In a Pretty Explicit Dior Ad

Take this with a grain of salt and all, but Robert Pattinson‘s new Dior campaign coming out in May is apparently pretty “explicit” and includes him “acting out a foursome” (or FOURSOME, as The Sun like to put it). All this debauchery wasn’t just a nice “f-ck you” to Kristen Stewart, but it also earned him £8 million ($12.1 million). Hurrah!

Let’s have a read, shall we?

R-Patz indulges in some “arty” bed-hopping for a new Dior men’s clothing campaign which will be appearing everywhere from May.

He filmed his demanding gig just after Kristen broke his heart when pictures emerged of her and director Rupert Sanders getting it on. So he must have given the arduous shoot some extra welly — with an “e” not an “i”.

A Dior source revealed: “The advert is sexually explicit. It is pushing the boundaries of what you can get away with in advertising.

“Robert is topless for part of it and kissing one of the models with tongues. He really gets stuck in.

“There’s another scene where he takes part in a foursome in various states of undress, although it’s not clear whether those scenes will make the final cut.

“According to the people on set, he didn’t take much persuading to get into the role. He got stuck right in.”

Well, I would hope he got stuck in – they didn’t pay him to stand there and look pretty. Also, hilarious that they think it’s explicit to kiss with tongues and for a bro not to wear a top. Okay, then. However, I’m looking forward to seeing this. Love me a bit of Pattinson, and I don’t care who knows it!

March 21, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer