Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kylie Jenner

Can Kylie Jenner Actually Sing?


Okay, so this is a bit of a weird one. You know how a few months back, I said Kylie Jenner might be bringing out a single? That seemed – for the time being, anyway – to be a bit of a joke. Have you ever been more grateful for bad humour in your life? I don’t think so. But now she’s posted a Snapchat of herself “singing”, and people are freaking out. Can Kylie Jenner actually carry a tune, or was she actually lip syncing to a portion of a Pia Mia song, as many have claimed? What’s HAPPENING?

I think it’s pretty safe to say that Kylie will never be the next Katy Perry, and frankly, I don’t think this is her voice at all, but homegirl is desperate for attention any way she can get it, so of course she’d be all too happy to let people believe it’s her

Also, she did like, 1 bar, so you can’t even really tell what her voice is like anyway, if it was hers. Not impressed.

What do you guys think?

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Kylie Jenner & Tyga Are Apparently Engaged

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Stop me if you’ve heard this one before, but Kylie Jenner – who is 17 but seems desperate to pretend she’s twice that age – is apparently secretly engaged to her grown ass man* boyfriend, Tyga, and planning to marry once she turns 18 at the end of the summer. Yikes! Now there’s something for her family to worry about.

From In Touch Magazine (via Radar Online):

“Kylie accepted Tyga’s proposal a few weeks ago and made the announcement to her family,” an insider told In Touch magazine. “She wants to get married as soon as she turns 18 in August.”

The source claimed that Kylie “can’t wait’ to get married to Tyga, who has already proven his dedication to the teenage reality star by tattooing her name on his arm. “She told her friends that Tyga gave her a ‘symbolic ring’ for now and she isn’t showing anyone until her birthday, when she’ll make an official announcement… They’re tired of hiding,” the source said.

LOL, a “symbolic ring”. Mean, this whole thing sounds like SUCH a great idea! Imagine what a wonderful life they’re going to have, sitting around in Kylie’s mansion, getting “high as fuck” and eating fried chicken 24/7. Sweet life.

*By definition/birth year. NOT in actuality.

P.S. Check out Kylie’s totally natural hips/ass! Jesus, it’s like watching Kim Kardashian become plastic all over again.

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Kylie Jenner’s Family Is “Worried” About Who She’s Hanging Out With These Days

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Kylie Jenner is only 17, but she lives like a grown ass adult. She’s got an SUV of her own, a mansion of her own, an adult boyfriend of her own, and she doesn’t need any supervision. Well, she actually does NEED it, she just doesn’t have it. However, it seems like her recent escapades of being “high as fuck” on Snapchat have managed to shake some sense into her family, because they’re all said to be “worried” about her lifestyle and the people she’s spending time with these days.

From People:

According to a Kylie pal, her family doesn’t think she’s “out of control,” but “a few are worried” about her boyfriend Tyga’s influence on her. 

“A lot of Tyga’s friends are enablers,” the friend says. “That makes her mom the most nervous. She doesn’t want Kylie getting off track.” 

The 25-year-old rapper has been romantically linked to Kylie since September, and the two have kept their relationship “under wraps as much as possible for obvious reasons,” the friend says. “Her parents know she is going to date who she wants, but they are worried he will have a negative impact on her decision-making.” 

“She’s become a perfectionist because she feels like she needs to be just as sexy as her other siblings, specifically Kendall and Khloé,” the pal says. “She doesn’t feel inadequate next to them, but she’s willing to do whatever she can to herself to make her feel like she’s looked at by the public in the same way.” 

Kylie, who plans to move out into her own Calabasas mansion “the second” she turns 18, “is obsessed with the attention and knows that acting a little scandalous here and there will keep her in the spotlight,” the friend says.

This is what’s wrong with that entire family. Kylie is desperate to be looked at in the same way as Kim, but… no one respects Kim Kardashian. I’ve never met a single person who says anything positive about Kim that isn’t about the size of her ass, her boobs, or anything to do with her appearance. No one’s saying, “Wow, what an intelligent, perceptive and interesting human being!” when they talk about her or anyone in that family. That’s not something to aspire to, frankly, Kylie is 17 and should be in high school, getting an education so that when the public she’s busy pandering to finally gets tired of her try-hard family, she’s got something REAL to fall back on.

I’m not saying the girls can’t be proud of their appearances, or to use them to get further ahead in an industry where frankly looks are what matters. I’m saying that it’s a problem when there’s literally nothing else beneath that. If you’ve ever seen Kylie Jenner in moving/speaking form, you know she’s a living example of why “No Child Left Behind” was formed (and failed).

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Kylie Jenner Swears She Wasn’t High, Just Hungry

kylie jenner high

If your bullshit alarm wasn’t blaring loud enough to wake up the entire neighbourhood after just reading the headline, congratulations: you’ve managed to continue living under a rock. Kylie Jenner posted a video on her Snapchat account this week in which she pretty clearly says that she’s “high as fuck” before biting into some delicious morsels. But since everyone is losing their shit and acting like Kylie smoking weed is the craziest, most scandalous thing they’d ever heard in their lives, she’s since come out and claimed she wasn’t high at all, just hungry!

Sure, maybe she WAS saying her chicken was good as fuck, but uh… that doesn’t preclude Kylie from smoking herself. I just don’t buy it. Also, weed is basically like cigs now in terms of outrage factor – so why she feels the need to go on damage control over something so dumb rather than just being like, “Yeah, son, I was BLAZING!”

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Does Kylie Jenner Get “High As F*ck”?

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Everyone started bugging out yesterday over a Snapchat video Kylie Jenner posted on her account that totally featured her saying “I’m high as fuck” before biting into some piece of delicious food. ESCANDALO! Because, you know, it’s so hard to imagine that a 17-year-old child who’s been dating a grown ass man for the past year who also happens to be a rapper and clearly smokes plenty of weed himself, would be getting high. Also, because she’s a teenager, and none of us EVER experimented with drugs or alcohol at that age.

Raise your hand if this surprises you. No one? That’s what I thought. I think the most important question here is, what is she eating? If it’s that good, I need to get on that.

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Kylie Jenner Finally Confirms Her Lips Are Fake

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I’m sure this will totally come as a massive shock to you guys, but listen to this: Kylie Jenner‘s lips are NOT NATURAL! She actually had fillers done, despite the fact that she’s (still) not even legally an adult and she made this decision when she was younger than she is now! While Kylie has tried to pretend that it’s all about “overlining” her lips, Khloe spills the truth beans in an upcoming episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, because nothing in life exists for this family unless a camera is there to catch it.

It’s “too much” to ask you if you’ve cosmetically enhanced your appearance, when your entire career… is based on your appearance? At least Khloe gave her some good sisterly advice:

Mmmhm. Eventually, Kylie does open up to… the camera to say that she’s “insecure” about her lips and that’s why she decided to inject poison into them, just like her mom and sisters have done before:

LOL, her blank stare. I seriously wish she would just go back to school, get an education, and stop focusing so much on trying to be like Kim. It’s so sad, and so destructive, and it’s clear that she’s sorta just been thrown into this world of whoring herself out to anyone who will pay attention. For an adult who chooses that? Fine, whatever, but Kylie is still a child and if anything, I sorta pity her. She’s SO awkward and hopeless in this world.

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Kylie & Kendall Jenner Want To Trademark Their Names

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Have you ever seen a family less aware of the world around them than the Kardashian/Jenner clan? Every single member – save for maybe Bruce, but he stayed with Kris for, like, 25 years, so I question his judgment, as well – lives in the clouds and has no idea how life actually works for most people. That’s the only reason I can imagine that Kylie and Kendall Jenner thought it would be a great idea to try and trademark their names.

From TMZ:

It’s all part of the Kardashian’s blitzkrieg campaign. We’ve learned Kylie Jenner has filed an application last month to trademark her first name to “entertainment in the nature of providing information by means of a global computer network in the fields of entertainment, fashion and pop culture.”

Kylie also wants to mark her territory for personal appearances “by a celebrity, actress and model.”

Although someone might theoretically use the name “Kylie” with a different font, K.J.’s lawyers could swoop in and argue it creates confusion among consumers. So Kylie Minogue, move over.

BTW … Kendall has filed an application to trademark her first name for the same purposes.

Guys, I wish I was joking. When I first read this, I thought I had accidentally clicked on The Onion because it’s too ridiculous even for them. At least Kendall has a “job” as a model for now, while she’s the flavour of the month. Kylie does absolutely fuck all besides try to look like Kim and date a grown ass man who’s been with her since before she was legal.

Plus, clearly no one has introduced Kylie to the ORIGINAL and forever queen of the name:

I rest my case.

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