Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kristin Chenoweth

Ugh, Kristin Chenoweth, Get Over Yourself

kristin chenoweth bikini

Kristin Chenoweth is a tiny little lady with a big voice and some big curves. By curves I mean boobs. I’m talking about her boobs. She pointed it out first, in People Magazine via E Online, when she said that shopping for a bikini is like,

“Hell on Earth. I’m a 32C on top. I have curves! I’m not a stick, so the wrong suit can make me look squatty. I have to watch that.

I am all for a positive and healthy body image, so K.C., stop putting yourself down! Stop subliminally apologizing for your body (read: I can “look squatty” and “I have to watch that.” No, you do not have to “watch that.”)

Now she’s saying she has a muffin top, but is trying to make it seem like she’s owning it, by turning into a cute jokey tweet. Check it:

kristin chenoweth

She is 4’11″ so I guess it’s reasonable that she could still only weigh 88 pounds…but holy shit. Anyway, the point is, no, you do not have a muffin top, and stop trying to relate by saying you do and making a hashtag joke. Doing this is a twisted way of building yourself up and putting yourself down at the same exact time. It’s saying, “I don’t weight a lot but I feel bad about saying that so let me throw in this dig at my own body.”

I do not know was thinking or where she was coming from when she tweeted this, because I am not Kristin Chenoweth. I’m saying that this can be misconstrued pretty easily and that as someone in the public eye and in the media with a lot of followers, this is not a smart tweet. (Celebs + twitter = not usually a good idea.) And I guess don’t expect a Coca-Cola endorsement any time soon.

And seriously, “hell on earth”? That’s the figure of speech you’re going with in regards to buying a bikini top?

She’s funny and sweet and I still like her, even though she shows up to award shows dressed like she’s going to a Jennifer Lopez costume party.

Kristin Chenoweth Ain’t Feeling American Airlines’ Nonsense

Kristin Chenoweth is pretty much close to royalty in several communities – there’s the Broadway community, the animal loving community and of course, the gay community. I don’t know what kind of monster you have to be not to recognize a queen when she looks you in the eye, but apparently American Airlines didn’t get the message and messed with the wrong bitch aboard a flight late last month:

From TMZ:

The altercation went down this week as Kristin boarded a flight from Dallas to L.A.. We’re told Kristin had her emotional support dog in tow — as she always does — when she was confronted by a gate agent supervisor who claimed Kristin didn’t have the proper paperwork to bring the dog on board.

When Kristin protested, insisting she had done everything correctly, the agent got “verbally abusive” in front of several passengers … scolding the actress … and Kristin was so shaken up, she burst into tears.

Eventually airline officials realized a mistake had been made — and Kristin was allowed to board the flight with her dog. Whoops.

After the flight, Kristin tweeted, “American Airlines: Dallas flight attnt supervisor Ms. Kidwell. Abuse not okay. #tripfromhell.

Obviously American later realized the error of their ways and made a public statement, saying:

“We have been in touch with Ms Chenoweth to offer our apologies for the misunderstanding,” a spokesperson said. “We refunded the cabin pet charge as soon as we realized the mistake. We hope she will consider flying American again in the future.”

Hell no. I flew American once from New York to Manchester and once was all it took for me to realise that they suck and I’ll stick with British Airways (the best airline in existence, for the record), even if I do often have to do that hellish layover at Heathrow. Their planes are dirty, they only have those TVs that come down from the ceiling every 7 or 8 rows and their customer service is ass, as is their tendency to delay flights. Boo all around.

Watch This: Kristin Chenoweth Goes Full Sedaris on ‘Letterman’

Some of you might remember that Kristin Chenoweth is my other spirit animal. (Yes, OK, maybe it’s more of a spirit zoo. I have a whole spirit menagerie that I regularly visit for inspiration.)

Anyway, here is Chenoweth on last night’s Letterman. And I am not kidding: whoa. Chenoweth ordinarily strikes me as cute, chirpy, and sincere, but this time, she goes “full Sedaris.”

Fortunately, I love Amy Sedaris! I love all the Sedares. I wonder whether the Talent Family is in need of another sibling.

I’m not sure whether Chenoweth’s Oklahoman accent matches Amy’s North Carolinian one (my ear honestly has trouble hearing the difference), but shouldn’t these women be best friends, at least? They can go out together for ice cream in matching A-line dresses!

In the video, Chenoweth purports to be on loads of Benadryl. I was skeptical at first, but no, the Jezebel comments section is filled with hilarious Benadryl anecdotes.

Father’s Day: Kristin Chenoweth Hopes You’ll Buy a Milkshake, Already

Kristin Chenoweth and a Frosty

Look! It’s totally my heroine, the lovely and talented Kristin Chenoweth, grinning Glee-fully by the Wendy’s Frosty dispenser on Monday, June 13.

According to Hollywood Life, her celebrity benefits a neat cause: for every Frosty they sell this Father’s Day Weekend (today! And tomorrow!), Wendy’s will donate 50 cents to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. So if you aren’t already considering adoption, well, at least think about maybe buying a Frosty this weekend. Frosties are really good with fries.

I’ve always adored Kristin Chenoweth’s talent, but only today I discovered that we are both adopted ([!!!!] and additionally, both raised as Southern Baptists! Help!), so obviously I am all about Chenoweth’s advocacy work. Myself, I was kind of old for being adopted, so I can’t help but admire the Foundation’s mission—a lot of their work focuses on kids in foster care who often tend, too, to be older.

There’s no fun, friendly way to put this, but this weekend really weighs on me: my adoptive dad died exactly one week ago, after a long illness. There! I finally said it, after a suitably wordy intro, to a bunch of anonymous readers. I hope that’s OK.

So in tribute, I feel compelled to remind you that every parent, like every kid, is so, so precious. If you are able, treat your dads, step-dads, and father-figures to plenty of love and hugs and milkshakes today, and tomorrow, and every day.

Kristin Chenoweth Is One Classy Broad

A photo of Kristin Chenoweth

Yesterday, Kristin Chenoweth stepped in as a guest host on Live With Regis and Kelly, and she proved to be the adorable, charismatic woman we all know her to be.  I mean, it’s not like I check out the show every morning or anything, but Kelly best watch her back, that’s all I’m saying.

One of the more charming moments happened when Kristin told a story from a performance of Wicked in which she was on stage, mid-song, and she got a touch of diarrhea, so she ran offstage, had a flying monkey strip her dress off, took care of business, then stepped back on to continue on with the show.  You know, no big deal or anything.

I remember being worried about getting hiccups during a show at my tiny college theatre, so I can’t even imagine being so afflicted on Broadway.  Just another example of Kristin Chenoweth being completely infallible.

Kristin Chenoweth is On One

Kristin Chenoweth Tweets About Cough Syrup

From time to time we’ve all enjoyed the side effects of the medicine we’ve had to take after feeling crappy. You ain’t never caught me frowning at some liquid codeine post-dental surgery or a little bit of a muscle relaxant from the doctor after going in for a bad back. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying the buzz when it’s prescribed, you know what I’m saying? Well, Kristin Chenoweth knows what I’m saying because homegirl is fuuuuuucked up on some sorta cough medicine she got to help her recover from a throat infection and Tweeting through the whole thing. Almost as good as Louis CK‘s drunken plane ride last week.

Is Kristin going Mormon on us and tripping on some OTC shit, or do are we thinking she’s got the good stuff?

Glee Is Not Going To Take Your Shit

Glee Cast

Back on April 26, Newsweek went and posted an absurdly homophobic article on their website that essentially stated that while straight actors play gay roles all the time, gay actors cannot play straight roles.  You guys just pray about that ridiculous statement for a minute.

The article mentioned actors like Sean Hayes (formerly Jack on Will and Grace, currently the lead in the Broadway revival of Promises, Promises) and Jonathan Groff (Rachel’s new boyfriend on Glee, also a pretty big deal on Broadway) come off as “wooden and insincere” while playing straight.  I have not seen Promises, Promises, but I watch Glee like it’s my job, and Jonathan Groff could seduce the fuck out of anyone, male or female, so you better open your eyes, Newsweek.

Kristin Chenoweth, Sean Hayes’ costar and a guest star on Glee, had some strong words to say about this article:

“This article offends me because I am a human being, a woman and a Christian. For example, there was a time when Jewish actors had to change their names because anti-Semites thought no Jew could convincingly play Gentile. Setoodeh [the author of the article] even goes so far as to justify his knee-jerk homophobic reaction to gay actors by accepting and endorsing that ‘as viewers, we are molded by a society obsessed with dissecting sexuality, starting with the locker room torture in junior high school.’ Really? We want to maintain and proliferate the same kind of bullying that makes children cry and in some recent cases have even taken their own lives? That’s so sad, Newsweek!”

Ryan Murphy, the creator of Glee, has taken this a step further by inviting the president of GLAAD to boycott Newsweek until apologies are made to all actors mentioned in the original article.  The author hasn’t apologized, but he has attempted to explain his reasoning and point of view on the issue, and nobody even cares.

I’ve seen all sides of this issue in action, and it seems to be more of an individualized thing.  I’ve seen straight actors play gay and vice versa with no problems whatsoever.  I played a lesbian once, and nobody told me I was wooden and insincere.  I’ve also seen gay boys struggle to butch up as required by certain roles.  However, my favorite experience with this issue by far is watching a straight man be completely unable to play a flamboyant gay man.  If you have never seen a somewhat insecure straight man attempt to do an elaborate drag routine involving a stripper pole to “Proud Mary” in a gold minidress, I highly recommend it.