Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian & Kanye West Will Renew Their Vows For Their 1-Year Anniversary

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I’m not sure whether or not I find it miraculous that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West will soon celebrate their one year anniversary of being a married couple. On the one hand, Kim hasn’t gone that long without topping up her butt implants, let alone sharing her life with another human being. On the other, both her ego and Kanye’s are so massive that no one else could possibly compare with the self-love they’ve found with each other. And now they’re going to renew their vows!

Kimye tied the knot on May 24th last year in Italy, so how can they outdo themselves this year to say “I do” all over again, despite the fact that they LITERALLY ONLY GOT MARRIED A YEAR AGO? Well, Paris, of course – the Eiffel Tower, to be specific.

From US Weekly:

The insider notes that the “Only One” rapper is renting out the Eiffel Tower for the special festivities. The lavish 58 Tour Eiffel restaurant has also been booked for a private event. The ceremony will take place following the pair’s appearance at the Cannes Film Festival.

The City of Light, of course, is the perfect place for the couple that has everything. “We fell in love in Paris,” Kardashian said at one time, “and then I got pregnant with our daughter in Florence.”

Must be nice to have more money than common sense in this life. Also, what the hell do Kim Kardashian and Kanye West need to be at the Cannes Film Festival for? What on earth do either of them have to do with film in any sense? THEY RUIN EVERYTHING!

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Kim Kardashian’s Selfie Book is Here, But It’s Not Complete

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Kim Kardashian released her book of selfies earlier this month – aptly titled Selfish – and people have been LOVING it. Even the high and mighty literary review sites have lavished praise on it, because it’s basically everything you love (and/or love to hate) about Kim. The book includes 448 pages worth of Kim’s selfies from over the years, as well as her profound observations about what was happening in her life when the photos were taken. In one, for instance, she was so inspired by the beauty of Asia that she knew she had to take a selfie. Work the logic of that one out.

Anyhow, this book has been selling like hotcakes, but there’s one small problem: it’s not complete! Kim discovered some unpublished selfies the other day that didn’t make it to the book, and now she wants to release a special edition to get them in, so as not to have her fans miss a single second of her life.


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So… I basically need to order this book, right?

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The Kardashian Family Thinks They’re Too Classy For Sears

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So, Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian have had their own “fashion” line – called the Kardashian Kollection – that’s been exclusively sold at Sears for years now. They’re fortunate they even got Sears, to be honest – their shit should be relegated to Kohl’s at best, so they should count their lucky stars an actual department stores like Sears wanted their shitty clothes and lingerie. However, now it seems like the girls are getting a bit too big for their britches, so to speak, as they think they deserve WAY better than Sears and are now setting their sights higher, hoping to get the Kardashian Kollection into a bigger, classier retailer.

From TMZ:

The Kardashians and Sears struck a big deal back in 2011 for the Kardashian Kollection, which features all sorts of apparel and jewelry.

By all accounts, the venture was successful. The best evidence we could find … in 2013 the Kardashian fashion empire raked in $600 million and the family got a $30 million cut.

We’ve learned the deal ended earlier this year and the store has been selling off the remaining items, and recently the store has been pulling the items from the shelves.

Sears tells TMZ the parting of ways was mutual, but our Kardashian sources say the family felt Sears wasn’t stable, having closed over 200 stores last year alone and suffering a $159 million loss in the last quarter of 2014.

We’re told the Kardashians have made a new deal with a major retailer and they will announce the partnership soon.

Not like these assholes need to be any richer than they already are, but I do have to say – $30 million cut out of $600 million sales does seem pretty paltry. I know they’ll need to pay the children who make all their junk, the cost of materials, taxes, Sears’ cut, etc, but that’s still a whole lot less than you’d expect them to come out with. I’d expect at least $100 million, but then, I don’t know the business.

Anyhow, I doubt Nordstrom will be picking this shit up. It’s novelty, pure and simple, and most people with any real taste in fashion would be caught dead in their stuff.

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Kanye West Made Kim Kardashian Accept Bruce Jenner As Transgender

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Bruce Jenner confirmed months of speculation on Friday during a 20/20 interview with Diane Sawyer, telling the world that he is transgender and is “for all intents and purposes… a woman”. While the response has been overwhelmingly positive from both the public and his friends and family (or so some of them would like to pretend – looking at you, Kris), one person took it a bit harder than others, and that’s Kim Kardashian. That is, until her husband, Kanye West, really opened her eyes by dropping some profound philosophic truth (about himself, natch) on her.

From Variety:

Bruce Jenner said that Kim Kardashian didn’t know what to think about his transition to a woman after catching him one day in a dress. But then something changed.

“You know what really turned me around?” Jenner recalls the reality TV star asking. “Kanye.”

The rapper, who recently married Kardashian, had the following advice for her:

“I can be the most successful person in the world…I can be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, which I am…but I’m nothing if I can’t be me…if I can’t be true to myself.”

Because Kanye having the freedom to be an egocentric maniac is definitely the same as being trapped in the wrong body and suffering gender dysphoria because of it. But whatever! She got there in the end, I guess.

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Kim Kardashian wants Kris Jenner to cut Rob off

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Kim Kardashian and her brother Rob haven’t gotten along in a long ass time. Whatever issues they have, they just can’t seem to bury the hatchet – that much is apparent. One of Kim’s big frustrations with Rob seems to be that he won’t help himself – everyone else in the family has a “job” and yet Rob is just coasting along, taking his family’s money and not even whoring himself out for it. Kim has a very strong work ethic, so she’s not happy about this and wants Momager Kris Jenner to cut him off… for good!

In the new episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Kim calls Rob “pathetic” and even Kris admits she’s at wit’s end over what the hell is wrong with Rob. They’re one of the richest families on earth, and yet they’ve all found it impossible to light a fire under Rob’s ass to get him to do anything besides eat and sell shitty socks. What gives?

Kim claims that everyone “lick’s Rob’s ass” and does whatever he wants, which seems strange since everyone in that family only does what THEY want and what benefits themselves, so… but Kim doesn’t like attention being given to anyone but herself, so she thinks Kris needs to give him the boot.

Clip from the new episode of KUWTK is behind the cut – I threw it there because I care about you and E! Online has this shit on autoplay and I can’t turn it off. Don’t say I never did anything for you!

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Kanye West is not happy with Kim Kardashian’s personal trainer

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Kim Kardashian hasn’t been shy in admitting that she’s struggled to lose weight ever since giving birth to North West a couple of years ago, but that probably just means that her body is where it’s meant to be, size wise. Her husband, however, doesn’t think so – Kanye West hired her a personal trainer and he’s none too pleased that the trainer also agrees that Kim is probably fine where she’s at.

On Sunday’s episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, he lashed out at wife Kim’s trainer for saying she “couldn’t imagine” seeing Kim at her goal weight of 120 lbs.

“She’s like, ‘There’s no way. I can’t even imagine you 15 lbs. lighter,’ ” Kim, 34, told sister Khloé Kardashian of her trip to the gym. “Kanye’s like, ‘Wait a minute. You are the trainer and you’re telling me you can’t imagine her 15 lbs. lighter? We need to get another trainer, then, because if I tell you she needs to lose weight in between her toe, you would have figured out a f—ing toe weight.”

Wow. If Kim wasn’t… you know, Kim, I’d probably feel really bad for her since she’s married to such a controlling egomaniac. If Kim wants to lose weight for herself, that’s fair enough – we’re all our own harshest critics, but she needs to be realistic in terms of results. Her frame is her frame and she’s never going to be Kate Moss, and that’s worked out just fine for her. But for her husband to become enraged because her trainer can’t maker her skinnier, i.e. his idea of ideal? Dear God.

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Kim Kardashian’s doctors told her she’s having too much sex

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Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have been trying for a while now to get Kim pregnant with their second child, but to no avail. Clearly, God is trying to spare yet another child from being raised with these two as parents, but Kim’s not taking the hint. Instead, she and Kanye are having sex at least 10 times a day, and a doctor has finally told her she’s a hot ass mess (in so many words).

From Life & Style:

“The doctor said he thinks I’m having sex too much,” Kim revealed. “He said one time is more powerful .. so we’ve tried everything. The doctor said when I have sex, I have to lay down for like 10 to 20 minutes .. He said it takes 10 minutes for a sperm to swim up there.”

Kim is frustrated that pregnancy isn’t coming along as easy as she’d like. “Literally teenagers on meth get pregnant in two seconds. It’s crazy. When you don’t want to be pregnant, it happens,” Sighing, she added, “I’ve done everything so perfect to try and get pregnant. There’s a list of things you shouldn’t be doing and I was perfect for 8 to 10 months and now I don’t understand.” Now, she says, she’ll try a different method. “I’m going to do everything that I want to do and that includes going platinum. Hopefully I will get pregnant doing all the wrong things.”

Once again, I love that she doesn’t at all consider that she’s not meant to have any more children. Enjoy the one you’ve got – you’re barely raising her, as it is. What the hell do you want another one for? Frankly, I hope, for the sake of any potential future child, that she can’t get pregnant again. Sure, she has the money to take care of them, but that entire family is toxic and being raised by nannies is NOT giving a child a proper upbringing, regardless of how much you spoil them with material shit.

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