Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Katy Perry

Katy Perry Has A New Man in Her Life

A photo of Katy Perry

But who could it be? I was thinking about making you guess, but since it’s so early I’ll save you the agony and let you know that it’s this guy:

A photo of John Mayer

Oh yes, there are rumors that Katy Perry is getting involved with the one and only John Mayer. Just think about that for a second. Let it really sink in. Like, picture them nuzzling necks or something. Could you just die?

From Us Weekly via Celebitchy:

Katy Perry’s last Friday night was a memorable one: She spent it with John Mayer!

Days after her divorce from Russell Brand was finalized, she joined the singer July 19 at West Hollywood’s Soho House. “They were affectionate, holding hands and cuddling!” says a witness. The duo had an encore the next night, when the Montana-based crooner, 34, shared pizza with Perry, 27, at her house. If it all seems a little rushed, consider that Perry — also casually seeing musician Robert Ackroyd — has had a thing for Mayer for years.

And onlooker recalls a flirtfest at NYC’s Goldbar on September 11, 2009, when “she made it her mission to hook up with him.” However, they left separately — then Perry hit it off with Brand the very next day. While Mayer’s rep says “they’re not dating,” Perry is plowing ahead. Says the insider, “She nailed down her crush!”

How does anyone have “a thing” for John Mayer, let alone “a thing” that’s lasted for years? I could maybe see hearing “Your Body is a Wonderland” for the first time and considering it for a minute, but that would have to be the extent of it. Over the years, John Mayer has proved himself to be quite the douche, but then again, so has Katy. So who knows, maybe these two douches can just douche together. Picture that.

Forbes Released Their Top 10 Highest-Paid Under Thirty List

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This year’s list is pretty predictable, when you take into consideration the biggest things that’ve happened this year—the second-to-last ‘Twilight’ movie debuted, Adele won every award known to man, (kill me for saying this, but) “girl power” dominated the charts with Katy Perry, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, and Taylor Swift, and of course there’s Justin Bieber and Lil Wayne. And that’s the list, guys. The whole thing. All of it. Check it out:

#10—Robert Pattinson, $26.5 million
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#9—Taylor Lautner, $26.5 million
photo of taylor lautner comic con pictures 2012 pic

#8—Lil Wayne, $27 million
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#7—Kristen Stewart, $34.5 million
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#6—Adele, $35 million
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#5—Katy Perry, $45 million
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Love It or Leave It: Katy Perry’s Independence Day Ensemble

A photo of Katy Perry

This is what Katy Perry wore to a bar on the 4th of July. It’s a little costumey for me, but hey, that’s Katy! What do you think?

Ok, fine. Look, this isn’t really about what Katy Perry wore on the 4th of July, obviously. Her outfit isn’t that cute or awful or remarkable at all, and I don’t want to insult you by trying to pretend like that’s the focus of this story. No, the focus of this story is something much bigger, and much more shameful.

I have a confession to make: I went to see the Katy Perry movie last night. And I loved it.

I went as sort of a joke, honestly. I thought it would be really funny – and a good few parts of it were – and I wanted to tell you guys all about it. But at some point, I stopped making fun of her and I started rooting for her. The movie showed quite a few clips from a video she made when she was 18, when she talked about how she wanted to write songs and become a star, and it showed a lot of clips of her interacting with fans. There was this one particularly adorable part where this little boy interviewed her backstage, and oh man, don’t even get me started on the segments with Katy’s grandma.

Then there were the parts about Russell Brand, and since I’m being completely honest here, I’ll go ahead and tell you that I cried a little bit. She did an interview at the beginning of the tour where she said that she’d found the love of her life, which was especially sad, since we all know how that ended. Then, later in the tour, when Katy got the news that Russell had filed for divorce… jeez. You see her lying in her makeup chair and just crying while her assistant and her makeup artist whisper about it. She reaches out her hand, and her assistance hands her this box, and Katy pulls out a necklace and puts it around her neck and starts crying harder, and her assistant tells her makeup artist that it’s a necklace that Russell got for her. They ask her if she wants to cancel the show or just do her best, and she tells them to start putting on her makeup. For her first entrance in the show, she comes up through the floor on this platform, and you see her just doubled over, sobbing, and the crowd is chanting her name, and finally she stands up straight, gives a nod, and puts on a big smile. It’s actually kind of heartbreaking.

But then there were parts that were not so endearing, like when Russell sent her a text joking that they should name their firstborn son after Ronald McDonald, and she said “babies can’t have babies, and I’m still a baby.” Remember when they got married and they both did all those interviews about having all those babies together? Yeah, that’s kind of shitty.

Regardless, what I’m trying to tell you is that for the next few weeks or so, I’m probably going to be a Katy Perry fan. I know that that was the goal of the movie, and I know that it was edited to make Katy look like a fun, awesome, saint of a pop star. I hate myself a little for buying into it, but I already know that I’ll be singing “Part of Me” for the rest of the weekend, and sometimes you just have to give in to this sort of thing, you know?

Blind Items, Revealed!

Today is a magical day. Or, well, yesterday was a magical day, but Sarah and I were busy celebrating America’s birthday, so we’re just getting to the magic today. See, yesterday CDAN revealed tons and tons of blind items. Let’s stop with the preamble and get right to those, all right?

This A list celebrity and former singer who seems to always wear sunglasses was out over the weekend when she stopped to watch a woman on the street singing for money. The celebrity said, “You are better than I ever was. Honestly, so is everyone.” She then actually laughed and dropped $500 into the bucket.

Who could that be? Any guesses? You don’t have to guess, because we already know it was Victoria Beckham! See how fun this is? It’s only just beginning!

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Quotables: Katy Perry Wants to Be Just Like Madonna

A photo of Katy Perry

“I think Madonna, especially in the beginning of her career when she was laying the foundation, was evolving every single time and giving a new visual and a new idea to the public. She kept everybody interested because you never knew what she was going to do next, but whatever she delivered was a solid product. I just hope to be the same. I hope to continually make people interested and hopefully in 10 years look back and have written songs that have become timeless.”

Despite how ridiculous Madonna is, it’s not hard to see why a newer singer like Katy Perry would want to be like her. Madonna had her first hit single when she was 24, and here she is, touring around the world and exposing her no-no zones at 53. She’s out of her mind, but she’s still a superstar.

But does Katy Perry have a chance of enjoying a similar career? I really, really don’t think so. I mean, can you see Katy Perry releasing albums thirty years from now? A 57-year-old Katy Perry strutting around, singing “I Kissed A Girl” while millions of people went wild over her? Does she really have that sort of staying power?

Love It or Leave It: Katy Perry Almost Had It Right

A photo of Katy Perry

Here’s a photo of what Katy Perry wore to the Part of Me movie premiere. I absolutely love it. I love it so, so much. It’s definitely, without a doubt, my favorite thing that Katy’s ever worn. That amazing dress, and the matching shoes and lipstick? It’s perfect. I could go on and on about this dress all day, but I won’t.

I won’t because Katy Perry ruined it all by wearing this hot mess on her way to the airport:

A photo of Katy Perry

It does look comfortable, but at what cost?

Here’s a closer shot of the dress and the leggings:

A photo of Katy Perry

The only thing I understand about these photos is that Katy is in her dark place. Perhaps she’s coming up with beautiful, moving songs in her head. Perhaps she’s just wasted. Who can tell? I’m not sure, but with an outfit as horrendous as this one, I really don’t want to analyze it hard enough to find out.

Katy Perry Is Taking A Break

A photo of Katy Perry

From Contact Music:

Katy Perry is taking a break from showbiz.

The 27-year-old singer reportedly wants to step back from her career and take time to properly recover from the breakdown of her marriage to Russell Brand last year.

According to the Daily Mirror newspaper, she said: ”I need to let my heart heal.”

Katy spent much of her 14-month marriage on her world tour and has hinted that her career was one of the causes for the split.

She said: ”For a modern woman, it is important to be supported and that there is equality in every aspect.”

Katy – who is now dating Florence + the Machine guitarist Dan Aykroyd – recently insisted she doesn’t regret her failed relationship with Russell, 37.

She said: ”Everybody asks me if I regret something, they ask me if it’s going to be that one moment [her marriage].

”Actually it’s really a lesson learned and it’s super valuable, I could not buy this lesson.

”And I apply it to my life, I learn and a lot of the time, I get really good material for my songs.”

The brunette beauty was unsure if she wanted to open up about her marital troubles in her upcoming documentary film ‘Katy Perry: Part of Me’ but ultimately wanted to be honest about her life.

She said: ”The whole movie is about overcoming obstacles, overcoming my family, my set of rules and belief systems.”

OH DEAR GOD NO. You can’t leave us like this, Katy Perry! Not when I’ve gone over two years with hearing your annoyingly catchy songs everywhere I go! What would I do without you to tell me that I’m a firework, and what would I strive for if you weren’t there to tell me about such beautiful things as teenage dreams and California gurls? How can I survive in this world without you?!