There was a real likelihood of the evening falling flat. How do you parody a parody? How do you make light of wife-beating? And who invites Mike Tyson to do stand-up, even? But the jokes were scathing, and the Roast bit to the quick. I’ve rolled my eyes at Charlie Sheen‘s recent I-Don’t-Have-a-Job Humble Pie Remorse Tour, and I don’t like him, but he sure did take his lumps like a champ. (Some critics are saying the jokes weren’t mean enough, but seriously, how many more jokes about Sheen ruining his kids’ lives did we really need?)
Comedian Anthony Jeselnik, to Charlie Sheen:
- “Every minute of your life looks like the first two minutes of SVU.”
- “The only reason you got on TV in the first place is because God hates Michael J. Fox.” (Cut to actor Richard Kind, in the audience, having a heart attack.)
- “If you’re ‘winning’, this must not be a child custody hearing. The only time your kids get to see you is in reruns. Don’t you want to live to see their first 12 steps?”
- “How much blow can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men!”
September 21, 2011 at 9:30 am by Jenn
Hey, I didn’t call her a “wharf rat.” I’m just trying to be supportive and agreeable here!
Private Practice star, Kate Walsh appears in the March issue of Redbook and talks about the dissolution of her marriage. This is it in a nutshell: When she got married, she didn’t think she would be getting divorced. She is known for being very persistent and trying, trying, trying. She got divorced after fifteen months. She still cares about her ex-husband. She was sad. She’s dating. She’s an insecure and desperate, quivering wharf rat. She wishes she could call guys and hang up but can’t because of caller ID. She longs for the days of being able to stalk dudes.
Kate obviously hasn’t heard of Facebook. Because I stalk my legions of exes on there. I love when they look really bad and defeated by life. Oh, I meant to say that I hope they are happy. Sigh…see why I could never be a celebrity?
February 26, 2009 at 5:23 am by Wendie
Kate Walsh and Balthazar Getty, neither of whom have had much luck with marriage lately, cuddle up at the Oliver Peoples Hollywood luncheon yesterday in LA.
But my favorite thing about this photo?
The little scrunched-up bulges in Balthazar’s pants.
What did Wendie call that again?
Oh, yes. An ass twat.
February 20, 2009 at 1:28 pm by Evil Beet
In the predictable shit-storm that is the end of Kate Walsh’s 15-month marriage, the divorce filings are flying.
Two weeks after her husband filed for divorce, the Private Practice star has submitted her own paperwork asking for a permanent split from 20th Century Fox exec Alex Young.
Both parties cite irreconcilable differences as the reason their 15-month union wound down so soon, but while Young’s filing listed their date of separation as Nov. 22, Walsh’s counterfiling has the break coming five days earlier.
Point is, don’t get married to some dude you’ve only known for a few months when you’re both ridiculously rich and important. You’ll both end up unsatisfied and divorcing each other.
December 26, 2008 at 9:54 am by Evil Beet
How many times have I said that Kate Walsh and her stupid quickie husband wouldn’t last a year?
Okay, I was wrong. They lasted just over a year. Why must Hollywood be so predictable?
Kate’s husband, Alex Young, petitioned for divorce in November, citing irreconcilable differences.
I know this is horrible to say, but Kate Walsh’s life was seeming a little too fairytale there for my tastes.
But I wonder why it was the hubby filing for divorce. I thought for sure she’d dump his ass. You think she was cheating on him? Or too focused on her career for his tastes? Too much boozing? Secret drug problem? I’ll entertain your wild guesses in the comments section.
By the way, the photo above was taken less than two weeks before the divorce filing. Hm.
December 11, 2008 at 2:44 pm by Evil Beet
Oh, look, it’s Kate Walsh. Perfect, gorgeous, rich, happily married, successful, skinny, kissed-by-every-hot-doctor-on-television Kate Walsh. Looking perfect. Yay.