Here’s a little bit of background information, just in case you’re not too knowledgeable on that lovely man pictured above. That is Karl Lagerfeld. He’s the head designer and creative director of Chanel. He’s also a major douchebag. Ok, I think we’re all caught up now, so I’m going to go ahead and show you guys some excerpts from an interview Karl gave in which, as the headline suggests, he would be better off just shutting his stupid mouth.

On Queen Elizabeth: I think [Queen Elizabeth] looks very good in her recent photos even better than a few years ago –beautiful, a bit like Queen Mary. She looks a little bit like her grandmother – a more smiley version. In terms of what she wears, she’s come into herself a little bit more – whatever that is.

On Russians: If I was a woman in Russia I would be a lesbian, as the men are very ugly. There are a few handsome ones, like Naomi Campbell’s boyfriend, but there you see the most beautiful women and the most horrible men.

On M.I.A. or perhaps Kristen Stewart: Nowadays people give the middle finger quite quickly – it’s not the best behavior. Everybody does that, what’s new about that? It’s just become a bad habit. People in magazines are 50% bimbo and 50% pregnant women.

On the Obamas: I’m a big fan of Mrs. Obama – and her face, I think, is magical. He would not be there without her. There was an article by some stupid woman, I forgot who, and she said she [Mrs. Obama] was poorly dressed. Mrs. Obama is not a fashion statement, she has other things to do. …My favorite line of Mrs. Obama is when a journalist asked her if she thought her skirts were not too tight and she answered, “Why you don’t like my big black ass?” This is a line I admire. She got me with that. So I want Mr. Obama who I think is very okay— because there is nothing better anyway — [to be re-elected], especially because of her.”

On Lana Del Rey and Adele: I prefer Adele and Florence Welch. But as a modern singer she is not bad.The thing at the moment is Adele. She is a little too fat, but she has a beautiful face and a divine voice. Lana del Rey is not bad at all. She looks very much like a modern-time singer. In her photos she is beautiful. Is she a construct with all her implants? She’s not alone with implants.

Real quick, let me just break your hearts by saying that no, Michelle Obama never made any such comment about her “big black ass.” But that’s just another reason why Karl Lagerfeld is a big ol’ bitch.  Like that Adele comment? Oh girl. Not today.

Just so that we don’t end the day on a somewhat sour note, I’ll just go ahead and share with you a little something that’s been making the rounds lately. I know you’ll love it!

(more…)

Chanel headKarl Lagerfeld doesn’t know when to stop scaring people talking. 

Lagerfeld has implied in the past that Klum is too fat to be a model and now has admitted that he actually doesn’t even know her.  “I don’t know her. Claudia Schiffer doesn’t know her.  She was never in Paris, we don’t know her.”   Gee…what do you think Karl is trying to say?  Do you think he means he doesn’t knowher?  By the way, what his redundancy translates to is:  ”Heidi Klum is too fat for me to acknowledge as a professional or as a human being.”

Anyway, if that wasn’t enough, Klum’s husband Seal wasn’t safe from Lagerfeld’s musings either.  About the singer , who suffers from a condition called discoid lupus erythematosus which causes facial scarring, Lagerfeld said, “ I am no dermatologist but I wouldn’t want his skin.  Mine looks better than his. He is covered in craters.”

Incidentally, Claudia Schiffer may not know Heidi Klum, but she knows where she shops.

Early copies of the Olsen twins’ book, Influence, are out, and the reviews?

Generally positive!

Says NY Mag:

Readers, we just got a copy of the Olsen twins’ new book, Influence. And it’s fantastic. We’re not even being sarcastic. We haven’t felt this way about a book since the one all about the costumes in the Sex and the City movie landed on our desk. Influence consists only of interviews conducted by the Olsens (with editor Derek Blasberg in tow) with the world’s most famous designers, photographers, artists, and tastemakers alongside pictures of them, their work, and the Olsens. We’re talking long, involved, revealing interviews that are, you know, entertaining. With people like John Galliano, Christian Louboutin, Terry Richardson, Richard Prince, and more. Yes, a coffee-table book that’s more than worth a read!

NY Mag also posted some snippets from the Olsens’ interview with Karl Lagerfeld, which is, admittedly, totally awesome.

I think I might have to buy this book.